The Land of Broships
by thefourteenthdarkone
Summary: A series of oneshots exploring the adventures of the various guilds in Fiore! This will be mostly focusing on the friendships between characters, but there will definitely be mentions of various pairings. Spoilers for all abound, so be wary! Ch35- Gray consulted Lucy on the matter of a gift for Juvia. He should have expected being dragged around the mall for seven hours.
1. Cobra and Mirajane

**Thank you, Dragon'sHost, for this idea! Usually I try and include as little pairings as possible, but it's a Cobra/Mirajane broship fic. How can you not have ships?**

Cobra had decided that whatever divine being decided that it was a good idea for Crime Sorciere, Fairy Tail, Sting, Yukino, Rogue, and Lyon (why was he here?) to be in the same place was an idiot.

Crime Sorciere had been by Magnolia Town and had dropped in to see Fairy Tail. As soon as Yukino heard that her sister was in town, she came running, dragging the Twin Dragons with her. Sting and Rogue had promptly challenged Natsu and Gajeel to a battle, as per usual (or so he heard). Cobra was not surprised to see that they got destroyed. He was surprised, however, when Fairy Tail's personal she-devil sidled up beside him.

"You can hear thoughts, can't you?"

"What kind of a question is that?" And why did she care? Unless…he's sorry for insulting that divine being, whatever it is. It's not showing mercy. Her mind is just like Meredy's, except on a permanent sugar high.

"I was wondering if you could tell me something." came the singsong reply. Singsong voice. That was bad.

"I'm not telling you if Grey wants to kiss Juvia. Or if Elman's in love with Evergreen. Or if Lucy likes Natsu. Or whatever other twisted things your minds' spinning up."

Mirajane made a big show of waving around her arms and shushing him. "_They'll hear you! Be quiet!"_ Cobra stared at her for a second, and then continued, just as loudly, "And I'm CERTAINLY not saying anything about Jellal. I got hit in the face with a meteor once, I don't want to experience that again."

"_BE QUIET!"_

This was going to be a long night.

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"Are you suuurrreee you won't tell me anything?"

"Yes."

"Possiiitttiiivveee?"

"Very."

"Absolutely and completely?"

"Most certainly."

"What if I get Kinana to convince you?"

"It won't work."

Exactly sixteen and a half minutes later, Cobra was being dragged around the guildhall, by a very happy Kinana and a very evil Mirajane.

"You're taking the blame for everything that comes of this."

"That's perfectly fine! So what about Natsu?

"Half of his brain is occupied with battling Erza. The other half is burning off Lucy's clothes to annoy her. I'm pretty sure that doesn't constitute love."

Mirajane and Kinana clucked. "You just don't understand Natsu's mind," came one answer. "It's true love!" was the other.

They were more annoying by the minute.

"So what about Lucy?"

"That girl's thought processes are so complex and twisted I'm surprised she's able to function. Forget it."

"Erza?"

"I reserve the right to not answer that question."

"Cana?"

"Drunk."

"Jellal?"

"See 'Erza'."

After several more answers like this, Mirajane gave him a very sad look. "You know, you aren't helpful at all."

That was the same face Meredy used when she wanted something. Wait a minute…..oh dear lord. It was intensifying. She learned that from the pink-haired menace herself. The _irresistible _pink-haired menace.

"Fine. I'll tell you one thing. But I have to say it really, really quietly."

He leaned very, very close to her ear and whispered, very, very softly,

"_Juvia likes Grey."_

Mirajane's scream of frustration was legendary.

**This was surprisingly hard to write, mostly because I wasn't sure whether I had Cobra right or not. Well, it's done now. I think I'll make this into my first attempt at multichapter fics(though each chapter would be a separate oneshot). If there's a broship you'd like to see in a future chapter, please tell me in a review! Sayonara!**


	2. Meredy and Juvia

**Meredy and Juvia is an amazing broship. I'm really hoping we get some moments in this upcoming arc. This takes place during the one-year timeskip.**

It was pure luck, that they were in the same place at the same time.

Crime Sorciere was looking for information on a dark guild, Ruby River or something like that, whose main operation seemed to involve kidnapping children. Crime Sorciere was all for their total destruction, for obvious reasons. Cobra had heard that they were going to be staging their next attack in this northern town, and so there they were.

Juvia and Grey had been traveling together for a while now. Four months, sixteen days, and twelve hours, to be exact. Juvia was counting. To be honest, she couldn't believe that she was actually going on a journey with the one and only _Grey-sama._ Not only that, but he was much less dismissing of her displays of affection. (And there were no love rivals to be found muahaha). The duo had recently heard of a demon sighting up north, and was heading to the town where it was last was seen. Grey was quite eager to demonstrate his vastly improved demon-slaying skills.

It might have been named Lilith Town, but it was much more like a city. Arranged in a circle, its people tended to hail from rich and powerful families, who bought villas looking for a mountain retreat. Beautiful cabins ringed the outside, with stores and restaurants filling the center. Although it was a bit difficult to get to, due to the whole being-inside-a-mountain-range, it still received a steady revenue in tourism. Coupled with the fact that many of these retreaters had children, it was the perfect place for a Dark Guild looking to cause chaos to strike.

Meredy was taking a preemptive look at the Dark Guild's headquarters' (not a hard thing to do, did these guys know _anything _about security?). As she snuck around, meaning that she walked wherever she pleased and knocked out anyone who saw her, she was having so much fun that she forgot to look where she was going, and consequently banged right into a blue haired woman, whose head was (as usual) up in the clouds.

Being Meredy and Juvia, both women immediately shrieked as loudly as possible and flew in opposite directions to hide behind a tree. Also being Meredy and Juvia, they soon realized who the other was and crushed each other in a hug, squealing. "I've missed you so muchI haven't seen you in foreverOMG I can't believe this happenedYou're still SO adorableYou're still SO prettyetc."

Leave it to Dark Guilds to ruin the happy moment.

Several beams of fire and more then a few clawed hands shot out from the trees, melting the snow and leaving little craters in the ground. If Meredy didn't have such good reflexes (and pulled Juvia with her), they would have both been impaled. Landing on top of a tree and regaining their composure, the mages surveyed the scene. Several Blood River (was that it?) mages were spread out, leering at them evilly. Neither was impressed.

"You know, I don't appreciate people interrupting my reunions," Juvia scowled, giving them her best glare.

"I believe we are in one state of mind," Meredy agreed, cocking her head ever so slightly and smiling a sunny smile at the dark wizards.

"Oh, the two little girls think they can beat our whole guild, isn't that cute?" "They don't stand a chance against our might!" "You silly kids are going down,"

They weren't amused, either, as the melted snow in the ground rose up, beginning to form menacing, demonic shapes. The guild arrayed in front of them was not truly scared, however, until Meredy held up her arm to summon a Maguilty Sodom, and showing her Crime Sorciere guild mark in the process.

"Wait a second…..That guild mark…" "And that magic…" "Oh no, we're screwed….."

Meredy and Juvia cackled at the dark mages terrified expressions' before jumping off the tree and raising both physical and mental hell on them, as Juvia kept using her 'Grey-sama Love' attack. Soon, they were all reduced to rubble and Meredy was singing "We Are The Champions".

"Juvia, you've gotten so much stronger!"

The water mage blushed a bit at the praise. "Grey-sama helped me a lot…."

"So you guys really are traveling together? That's great!" She grinned at Juvia. "and I'm sure you're getting forever closer and closer." And then her expression changed a bit, to one of sadness. "But that Fairy Tail disbanded…that must have seriously sucked. I couldn't believe it when I heard. Neither could Jellal, for that matter."

Juvia nodded. "Juvia was very sad when she heard. So was Grey-sama. We weren't there, you see. We had already left to train."

Meredy seemed to think for a second, and then she said, her countenance brightening, "Well, why don't we forget about that for a while and spend the day together? I mean, I haven't seen you in a million, billion years! We can go shopping, and play in the snow, and see how long we can get away with having a tea party on someone's roof….. Yes! I'm brilliant! Go tell Grey and I'll meet you in the square in ten minutes!"

And then she ran off like a madwoman.

Juvia shook her head. "Juvia is quite certain that Meredy never changes."

_TEN MINUTES LATER_

"It's a candy store. IT'S A CANDY STORE. I repeat, this is not a drill. There. Is. A. CANDY STORE!"

"Meredy, Meredy, look! That lady's making friendship bracelets! Juvia wants a blue one!" "I want a pink one! No, a black one!" "Get both!"

"My mind cannot comprehend the adorableness of that jacket. I want five."

"THAT WOMAN IS LOOKING AT GREY-SAMA'S PICTURE IN A MAGAZINE. SHE MUST DIE. LOVE-RIVAL!" "No, Juvia, don't kill that lady! Maguilty Sodom!" "Love-rival….."*glaring intensifies*

"Juvia does not understand why there is an ice-cream shop in the frozen north." "Neither does Meredy."

"We are so lucky! This shop has an entire tea set, with tea and everything!" "Juvia is not sure about this." "So which house has the flattest roof?"

"Meredy, I can't believe you destroyed not only a house, but beat up sixteen policemen, seven local wizards, the sheriff, and three innocent bystanders." "One of those bystanders was the lady from earlier with the magazine." "…Juvia saw nothing."

"Give my regards to Grey, and the rest of Fairy Tail whenever you see them! Bye-bye!"

"Same for Crime Sorciere, Meredy. Juvia hopes to see you again, very soon."

Thanks, Juvia. You've got this air of calm around you, that always makes me feel happy. It's truly beautiful, that you haven't lost what showed me the light all those years ago.

Thanks, Meredy. Your exuberance, your eternal state of euphoria…they were always there, even all those years ago when you couldn't see them in your heart. I always leave my meetings with you thinking, 'It's lovely, that smile of hers."

**Broship suggested by Dragon'sHost**

**Wow, that was harder to write then I thought it would be! And it was a lot longer, too. No one should trust Meredy with a tea set. As always, suggestions for the next broship are always welcome. Sayonara! **


	3. The Exceeds

**I have this headcanon that Charle, Happy, and Lector have this Lyon/Juvia/Grey thing going on, where Charle is Grey, Lector is Lyon, and Happy is Juvia. And Pantherlily and Frosch are the rest of the innocents in Juvia's love decagons. No one will convince me otherwise. Takes place between Tartaros and Grand Magic Games.**

Surprisingly enough, the Fairy Tail Exceeds had grown to like Lector and Frosch quite a bit, especially after that first meeting with Happy in Crocus. The two Exceeds had picked up the changes of the rest of Sabertooth, and had no plans of giving Happy a hard time anymore. There was one problem, however. And that was that Lector, just like Happy, had fallen madly in love with Charle, who, also like Happy, spent much of her time thoroughly rejecting his advances.

Seriously, those two were such idiots sometimes. Of course, the fact that they spent much of their time around Natsu and Sting could have had something to do with it.

"Charle! What a lovely day it is to see you! And may I add that that beautiful dress perfectly compliments your stunn- OW!"

Happy had hit him with a paw.

"Hey! You can't just flirt with Charle like that!"

"Oh really? Says who?"

Pantherlily and female cat in question rolled their eyes. They were sitting on top of a roof, which was where they had run into each other. The only other male cat (no one was quite sure what Frosch was) was quite lucky, in his opinion, to not have been dragged into it yet.

"They're clueless." "Agreed." "Fro thinks so too!"

The two arguing Exceeds sprang apart, glaring at each other.

"There's only one way to settle this."

"If Charle won't give us a clear answer-"

"Then Wendy-san and Natsu-san and Sting-kun will!"

And with that, both had taken off, flying at top speed towards Fairy Tail. The other three looked at each other. Charle sighed. "We might as well follow them. I don't want them pestering Wendy."

"One of these days, we're going to have to take Frosch and Lector to the Exceed Village. Then maybe Lector will stop hitting on you."

"And Happy."

"We all know you don't mind _his _affections."

"Fro thinks so too!"

_AT THE FAIRY TAIL GUILD HALL_

"Natsu! Wendy!"

"Sting-kun!"

Conveniently enough, all of the requested mages were sitting at the bar.

"We have a serious problem!"

"Charle won't tell us who she likes!"

Wendy started to laugh a little. "You two are so silly. You're always fighting about that, and you never just ask her."

Natsu and Sting were too busy cackling uproariously to answer. Wendy shook her head, and turned back to the two Exceeds. "It's funny. You almost remind me of someone. But I can't figure out who."

Natsu finished laughing and turned a critical eye on both. "Yeah, I get that too. Who could it be?"

_IN ANOTHER TOWN, THE HOME OF LAMIA SCALE_

"Juvia, darling, there's a lovely restaurant in town, if you would like to get away from this stripper for a while."

"NO! JUVIA WILL REMAIN FAITHFUL TO GREY-SAMA!"

"Oi, Lyon! You can't just take my guildmate like that!"

"Well, _you _don't seem to be dating her!"

"Dating Grey-sama? Juvia might faint!"

"Who said anything about dating!? AND YOU JUST STRIPPED TOO!"

"NOO! Grey-sama doesn't want to date Juvia!"

"How dare you upset my beloved?!"

"Shut up, Lyon. Before I kill you."

_BACK IN MAGNOLIA TOWN_

"Yeah, can't imagine who."

**Eh, that definitely wasn't my best work. However, I still hope you enjoyed it! ** **As always, broship recommendations are appreciated in the reviews. I have a couple in mind, but I'm always looking for unexpected ideas. Sayonara!**


	4. Cobra and Jellal

**I have FIVE tests tomorrow. FIVE TESTS. So, naturally, I'm writing fanfiction.**

**I received a request for Cobra and Jellal. I wasn't sure what to write, but I came up with this. Short and sweet, eh? **

**I'm sure you can guess who's talking on each line. Takes place anytime you want after Tartaros.**

"Jellal?"

"If this is about Meredy, I don't want to hear it."

"It's not about Meredy."

"Oh really?"

"It's about her _thoughts_ (that still counts as being about Meredy, Cobra!). Like, what kinds of books has she been reading? More importantly, just how much candy did Angel buy her when they went to 'investigate' in town?"

"It can't be that bad."

"I'd tell you how bad it is, but we're within twenty-seven miles of children. And I'd say it was Ultear's fault, but we're within twenty-seven miles of _Meredy._"

"Oh."

"Well, I can't really do anything. It's your magic."

….

….

"It involves you and Erza."

….

….

"I'll be right back."

**Imagine if Cobra was forced to hang around Fairy Tail shipping fangirls for a day. What do you think would happen to him?**

**As per usual, reviews are welcome, and requests for the next chapter are always appreciated! Sayonara! (I can't believe how many tries it took me to spell that right.)**


	5. Wendy and Charle

**This is yesterday's chapter, which I forgot to upload. I tend to do things like that, so if there's ever not a chapter and I don't say anything in the previous one about it, there will probably be two chapters the next day.**

**I've had this in my head for a while, but it was just little bits and pieces. A lot of people forget just how much damage and chaos Wendy could probably cause if she wanted to. The girl's nothing if not weak. She could be a mini-Natsu too.(there's your idea for the day, all you Rowen shippers).**

**I would appreciate it if you read the first four lines of this in the narrator of Fairy Tail's voice. I believe it enriches the experience.**

**Takes place between GMG and Tartaros arcs.**

It was a lovely day in the town of Magnolia, where Fairy Tail lies. The sun was out, the birds were chirping, and everything seemed perfect. It couldn't get any nicer.

But, little did they know, that terror and fear that would soon envelope the strongest guild in Fiore…...

In the guild hall…..

"I'm so hot!"

"Don't you DARE take your clothes off!"

"Strawberry cake is the great-est, strawberry cake is the be-est!"

"Back away, Erza has cake! And she's _singing!_"

"Happy, if you drop a fish on me one more time, so help me…."

"NATSU! Lucy's trying to eat me!"

"Stupid ca- NATSU BURNED MY CLOTHES OFF!"

"Natsu is MAN! Ow! What was that for!"

"Stop saying man! Or I'll slap you again!"

"Hey Natsu! Get over here and fight me! You started this!"

"GAJEEEEEEEEEL! YOU DESTROYED MY BOOK!"

"I'LL HELP YOU AVENGE IT, LEVY!"

"We'll help too, Levy-chan!"

It was a typical day in Fairy Tail, which meant ninety-seven percent of the guild was locked in a brawl, and the other three percent was, well, Wendy. (And Charle too, technically.)

"They're really going all out this time, aren't they?" inquired the Exceed, in a slightly exasperated voice.

"Yeah, even Lucy and Levy got caught up in it! And I think Kinana just punched Macao for hitting on her!" agreed Wendy, giggling. It was always fun, watching the brawls. And everyone always came to her for healing afterward, which meant getting lots and lots of cookies. She wasn't _completely _innocent (and that was probably Cana's fault).

"Well, I'm just glad you're sensible enough to stay out of all this useless fighting. Honestly, it's ridiculous. It's not like they're accomplishing anything useful, besides making the master do more paperwork."

"But that's not helpful." Wendy pointed out, slightly confused.

"Exactly my point." Charle replied, sounding considerably more vexed now.

However, sensibility did not help Wendy…

…..when a chair flew out of nowhere and smacked Charle, directly in the head.

She fell off the table with a loud shriek, and cast an indignant look in the brawl's direction.

But that was nothing compared to the dark aura that surrounded the Sky Dragonslayer, as she slowly stood up, her face shadowed and voice trembling.

"Charle was just innocently, _innocently_ sitting, not interfering with your stupid, _pointless_ fight, and you went and **hit** her. With. A. Chair.(at this point, the brawl slowed down, people turning around to look at Wendy) I can stand if you hit me, but I will not, will NOT, WILL NOT, STAND FOR YOU. ATTACKING. CHARLE!"

And with that last word, Wendy launched a terrifying large column of air right through the middle of the remains of the fight, her eyes shooting sparks of Laxus-like proportions.

"AND YOU DESTROYED MY COOKIES! YOU ARE ALL GOING TO PAY!"

'Pay' was drawn out as Wendy knocked Natsu and Gajeel to the side and clonked Lucy and Levy's heads together at the same time. She then proceeded to whirlwind through the Strauss siblings, sent Max, Pantherlily, and Freed flying through the roof, and a Wing Attack dropped a table on Evergreen, whose fan all but punched Freed in the face. Juvia and Laki were the next victims, and then Wakaba and Romeo were knocked out by chairs with minds of their own. Her anger was great, and her rampage seemed unstoppable.

"RAAAAAAAAARRRRR!"

It was like she was a roaring dragon, raining punishment on all of them. Everyone was too surprised by Wendy's sudden and apparent descent into madness to do anything against her, and she had even sent **ERZA **bowling into a wall by the time Alzack and Bisca's parenting instincts kicked in.

_Rule 143 of parenting- When a very powerful wizard child is throwing a temper tantrum and is honestly perfectly justified in it, give them cookies. LOTS of cookies._

Thank God Jet had speed magic, and with a little coverage he was able to escape and nearly teleport to the bakery. The baker saw his panicked expression, the chaos at the guildhall, and his plea for sugar cookies, and said he'd sent the bill to Fairy Tail. Also thank God this particular baker was Erza's favorite.

"Wendy! Wendy dearest! Look, sugar cookies! Jet brought them to replace your destroyed ones! And Bisca bandaged Charle up!"

Wendy's head snapped to look at them from the pile of guild members she was standing on, and she immediately jumped down, hugged them, grabbed a completely stunned Charle, and went back to one of the only undestroyed tables to enjoy her, in her eyes, well-deserved cookies.

Fairy Tail looked at each other. And then looked at the several unconscious people on the floor. And at the wrecked building.

"I think we can agree…." Lucy began in a terrified whisper….

"...To never, ever, **ever** again hurt Charle in front of Wendy." finished Grey.

"Or destroy her cookies." added Lisanna.

"That too."

**Everyone better worship Alzack and Bisca from saving them from Wendy. Maybe it's not Cana's influence we better be worried about, but Natsu, Gajeel, and Grey's. They're the real problems. **

**That was honestly fun to write. I just love the idea of Wendy beating up everyone so much (is there something wrong with me?)**

**The invisible ninjas failed to slip any pairings into this one! thefourteenthdarkone: 1, invisible ninjas:...still seven. Dang it. **

**Reviews are lovely, and recommendations for the next broships are very useful (I have a limited daily amount of creativity). Although do note that it could be a couple chapters before I get to your request, I have quite a few lined up. Sayonara!**


	6. Lucy and Yukino

**This was suggested by TheLibraryWitch. And they even gave me a prompt. Lovely person. This was supposed to be posted as today's chapter an hour ago, but episode 220, aka THE ULTIMATE GRUVIA EPISODE, happened. And as a hardcore Gruvia shipper, I was required to wave my arms around and squeal for no less than thirty-seven minutes. **

**Takes place about a month after the GMG(Tartaros hadn't happened yet, right?)**

"Yukino! Yukino!"

The white-haired teenager opened the door to her apartment to see none other than her fellow Celestial Spirit Mage.

"You know how they FINALLY decided to put a shopping center in Magnolia! Well, it's open! And I was going to go, and I thought you might like to come!"

Yukino was happily surprised. She didn't go shopping often (a result of not caring about clothes much), and Sabertooth didn't have that many female mages for her to go with. So this was a welcome adventure.

"I'd love to! Just let me grab my purse….."

_LATER…._

"Wow! There's so many stores!"

"Hey, look! Sorcerer Weekly opened an office! Maybe I can apply to be a model! Rent money….."

"Lucy, calm down!

"Ooooh, my favorite lingerie store has a place….."

"L-l-l-lingerie!?"

Lucy dragged the blushing mage into the store, and was promptly greeted by her red-haired teammate, who twisted around incredibly fast and grabbed her shoulders.

"Lucy! Oh, good! I can't decide what to get! Oh, Yukino's here too! She can help!"

"B-b-but Erz-AH!"

The shriek was caused by Erza beginning to wave lacy undergarments in Lucy's face.

"I can't decide! Red or pink! No, that's too revealing! That's too small! That's too big! I can't decide on ANYTHING! I need cake. Cake. Cake. CAKE. AHHHHHH!"

And with that, Erza ran out of the store, arms flailing and emitting a high-pitched alarm-like sound. Lucy and Yukino simply sat there, stunned. For several minutes.

"Let's…...leave."

"Yeah."

_AT ANOTHER STORE_

"Hey, these jackets are cute!"

"I like the one with the angel on it."

"You should get it. We're here to shop, after all! Huh?"

Lucy turned, just in time to pull both herself and Yukino out of the way of a terrified-looking Grey.

"Lucy! Yukino! You gotta help me! There's this cafe that's doing a Valentine's Day couples special for tomorrow, and Juvi-AHHHHH!"

He was cut off by a blur of blue tackling him.

"Love-Rival is attempting to make Grey-sama go with her to the Valentine's Day couples special, using her seduction tactics! Don't worry, Grey-sama! JUVIA WILL PROTECT YOU! WATER NEBULA!"

She managed to not only hit Lucy, but Yukino, six customers, several store racks and

"Oh no…."

The store manager.

They all ended up banned from the store. Forever.

"JUVIA!"

"I wanted that jacket!"

"You scared away Grey-sama! Waaahhh!"

"STOP! You're going to flood the place!"

_SEVERAL YARDS AWAY FROM THAT PARTICULAR STORE_

"Hey, a karaoke bar! Want to go in, Lucy?"

"Why not?"

Suddenly both of their faces went white.

"I know why not-"

"Me too-"

They looked at each other, with horrified faces and said, in unison,

"Gajeel and Orga."

And then they ran. Far, far away.

_SEVERAL __**MILES **__AWAY FROM THAT PARTICULAR STRETCH OF STORES_

Lucy and Yukino were innocently looking at shoes when suddenly….

"Lucy?" Yukino whispered.

"Yes?"

"Am I seeing what I think I'm seeing?"

Lucy looked over. Yep. There it was. Spiky pink hair, nearly identical blonde hair, blue ears, red ears. What did she honestly expect?

"What do you want to bet they're planning on ruining our shopping trip?" Yukino murmured.

"It's already ruined. Let's bust them up!" Lucy replied, grinning wickedly.

Natsu and Sting had met up (both suspiciously near the two Celestial Wizards) and were "casually" hiding in bushes while watching them and getting teased mercilessly by Happy and Lector, who seemed to have picked up a few things.

"You loooovvvveee hee- EEEEEKKKK!"

The blue Exceed was cut off by a whip snatching him around the wrist and throwing him into the side of a building with a resounding crash. Natsu and Sting both gulped, as they looked up and saw the two very angry looking females.

"You two _wouldn't _have been planning to interrupt our shopping trip, would you now?" asked Lucy in a sickeningly sweet voice.

"I _certainly _hope not," came Yukino's voice, made even more terrifying by the fact that Yukino was rarely angry.

"U-um of c-c-course not! We weren't planning anything really we weren't we promise you don't kill us!"

The two girls looked at each other.

"WE DON'T BELIEVE YOU!"

And that was how Fairy Tail's strongest Dragonslayer and the Guild Master of Sabertooth ended up getting flung through several walls before Pisces stabbed them for "interrupting Mama's free time" and Loke punched them for "being rude to two lovely ladies".

From inside the nearby store's shadow, Rogue smirked. Becoming an evil world dominator may have been a downside, but being the Shadow Dragonslayer had its merits. Frosch simply played with the butterflies.

**Rogue was also smart enough not to hang around Sting and Natsu while they were spying on people. Blonde and pink hair is NOT that hard to spot. And quite honestly, no one was going to bother Frosch. **

**Review, recommend, etc, etc. Sayonara!**


	7. VD Special! Meredy and Mirajane

**Sorry this is late. A bunch of family matters came up, and I was very much occupied throughout the day, forcing me to leave this chapter unfinished on the actual date of February 14th(but it can still technically be Valentine's Day, right?)**

**And yes, because it's literally the Love Holiday, this chapter is most likely much more romance than bromance. Don't worry, we'll be back to our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow.**

**Meredy and Mirajane really are evil little wizards, aren't they?**

**Takes place after Fairy Tail has gotten back together and Laxus is the new master and Crime Sorciere visits a lot and all that good stuff.**

It was the end of February 14th at the guild, and Mirajane was looking at the clock.

10:00. She needed to go.

"Kinana?"

"Yeah?"

"Mind taking over for a bit? I have somewhere I need to be."

Kinana grinned and agreed, obviously assuming Mirajane had a date. She did, but it wasn't a romantic one…..

Slipping into a side door in the large new guild hall, Mirajane practically flew down several flights of stairs, before coming to a huge steel door with several locks on it.

'Now let's see…...the password…..Ah, there we go."

Entering in several secret passwords (read: ship names), she hurried into a large room with comfy chairs and tables, several pictures, maps, posters, charts, and pages covered in writing stuck on the walls, a gigantic lacrima screen, and a smoothie/donut machine (hey, shippers get hungry from all the fangirling).

Mira walked in, and paused for a second, squinting. There it was. A tuft of pink hair, a corner of navy fabric, and the curve of black earmuffs, peering out from behind a fluffy blue chair.

"Meredy, I see you."

The eighteen-year-old mage tumbled out from the chair, giggling. "How do you always see me?"

"You wear black earmuffs, a dark blue cloak, have pink hair, and hide behind the sky blue chair."

"Good point."

Both walked over to the swivel chairs positioned in front of the screen's dashboard. Mirajane clicked a few buttons, and the screen split into several pieces. A lever was pulled, and the screen filled with pictures, from the surveillance cameras the she-devil had surreptitiously placed around the guildhall and Magnolia town.

"Let's see if our efforts paid off. Who do you want to check up on first?"

"Hmmmm….let's try Erza and Jellal. I'm running out of blackmail material, especially after I made the mistake of teasing Cobra about Kinana. He won't tell me anything anymore."

"It's alright, Meredy. You're still learning the ways of matchmaking."

While Mirajane pulled up a file, Meredy jumped out of her chair and bowed. "Of course, senpai!"

**File# 4**

"This was a lovely collaborative effort. Unfortunately, the initial attempt to manipulate Erza was unsuccessful, as it was Valentine's Day and she knows me too well. Luckily, Special Operative Wendy was enlisted, and used her irresistible charms to convince Erza to take her on a picnic, and then promptly remembered she had to go help Chelia pick out a gift for Lyon, leaving Erza to enjoy herself. What did you do again?"

"The rest of Crime Sorciere helped me sneak attack Jellal, knock him out, drop him in the forest next to the designated spot, and use various potions to ensure he didn't wake up until the correct time."

As you can see, Mirajane and Meredy have much different methods of matchmaking. Clearly, there is a reason Meredy has much to learn.

"Well….ok. So Jellal sees Erza having a picnic and decides to say hi, and she drags him over to try the seventeen different kinds of cake in the picnic basket, and they spend the entire afternoon together."

"But they didn't kiss."

"No, they didn't."

"So it was a failure."

After crying for forty-six minutes, the two girls moved on.

**File# 9**

"Remind me to kill those two fanboys of Levy's for interfering. MY PLAN NEARLY WORKED!"

"You guilted Levy into telling Gajeel about what happened during the fight with Torafusa, right?"

"YES. And he was looked really confused and he [deleted][redacted] SMILED and was about to [removed] SAY something and then those two [unprintable][unmentionable][we didn't know that kind of word even existed] boys come running in with their gifts for Levy and RUINED THE [omitted] MOMENT! AND I AM GOING TO CHASE THEM DOWN AND I AM GOING TO-"

"Um, oh, uh,OH LOOK IT'S SPECIAL OPERATIVE HAPPY(happy get the hell down here!)"

"Oh, lovely! Any news on Natsu and Lucy?"

Both Happy and Meredy shivered and vowed to not bring up Gajeel or Levy (or heaven forbid Jet and Droy's) names again.

**File# 2**

"This operation was also, pardon my tone, a complete and utter failure."

"And why would that be?" asked Meredy and Mirajane in unison.

"Not only did Asuka not take the bait this time, but Natsu can't take a hint, Juvia nearly hung Lucy off the balcony before they even talked, the chocolates I gave to Natsu for 'whatever you want' got smashed when Gaj-"

"Who?"

"NO ONE NO ONE NO ONE uh anyway and Laxus electrocuted all of them for causing a disturbance." He showed them his singed wing. "I barely got away!"

"Ah well, Natsu may not be as dense as everyone thinks he is, but any romantic plan involving him was doomed to failure from the start. Who's next?"

From the depth of the Exceed and the Crime Sorciere mage's souls, a sigh of utter relief was heard.

**File# 12**

"Now this is the interesting one."

"Indeed. Indeed it is."

"In fact, I haven't even looked at it yet. What happens?"

"Don't know."

*sound of clicking play button as the screen whirs to life*

"Grey-sama?"

"Huh? Oh, hey Juvia."

"Juvia has a present for you."

Juvia hands Grey a heart-shaped box of chocolates. Predictably, they all have Juvia and Grey cuddling on top of them. Unpredictably, Juvia pulls out _nothing else._ Also unpredictably, Grey presses a beautiful ice necklace into Juvia's hand. (Juvia faints with excitement, along with Meredy, Mirajane, and Happy).

But they didn't kiss.

ANOTHER FAILURE.

**File# 16**

"I decided that Yukino would look cute with either of the Twin Dragonslayers, so I made a file for both of them and then set something up for both so tha- Meredy, why do you have that funny expression on your face?"

Happy looked quite pleased with the idea. True to Mira's words, Meredy looked a combination between horrified and scared out of her wits.

"Meredy- HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

Meredy had pushed Mirajane off the chair and was frantically erasing all of the data in the file. Her fingers flew over the keyboard as she destroyed any vestige of the file. Happy had obviously recognized the danger, as he had flown Mira high enough for just long enough for Meredy to finish deleting everything. Mirajane was screaming.

"NOOOOO WHYYY I'M GOING TO FIRE YOU FOREVER BOTH OF YOU WHY? WHY WOULD YOU-"

She stopped short on seeing the expression of pure terror on Meredy's face as she said, quietly and trembling, "Angel."

_IN A CASTLE JUST THERE FOR PLOT PURPOSES_

Sorano Aguria, aka Angel, cackled while her various Celestial Spirit spies crowded around her.

"Don't worry, Yukino. I will protect you from those evil demonic creatures, akin to Zeref himself. I WILL AVENGE YOU!"

**Yeah, Angel might be good again, but that doesn't mean she lost all of her insanity. Coupled with the fact that she's guilty because she didn't protect her long-lost sister over the years and said sister hangs out with two very attractive teenage boys, no one will be able to protect the world from devastation (plus no people will be united ever again).**

**Also, I have this thing where I think Juvia will be less hyper-obsessive towards Grey after they travel together for an entire year. Might be nice.**

**Anyway, that's the chapter. Review, recommend, all that good stuff. Sayonara!**


	8. Cobra and Lucy

**Is anyone else asking what the [redacted] was up with Chapter 420? I mean, Natsu's right about the dark side.**

**I MEAN, CHARLE. I THINK WE ARE ALL ASKING THAT QUESTION.**

**Anyway.**

**This was a request that I am finally getting to. It will probably be short. Cobra needs to stop hanging around Fairy Tail…**

"Lucy?"

Lucy was sitting in the woods, a little while outside Magnolia. Someone had given Juvia a love potion, she had used it wrong, and now no less than seventeen boys, eight girls, and Frosch were madly in love with the water mage. Lucy had needed a break. Considering who was talking to her and how unlikely a conversation between the two was, it looked like she wasn't going to get one.

"You don't generally make a habit of talking to me, Cobra."

"I had to ask you a question."

She sighed. Joy. "Fire away."

"How do you _function_?"

The blonde looked at the Dragonslayer standing next to her in total confusion.

"...What?"

"Your mind has so many twisted pathways and labyrinths and walls and whatnot that it gives me headaches just listening to the _surface _of your mind, not to mention any deeper. How does your brain sort that out from the commands to _move _and _talk _and all that?"

There were several things Lucy could have said, including the twelve about how he shouldn't be listening to any of her deeper thoughts.

She decided on, "Because."

"Because what?"

"I'm a girl."

And then she walked off, leaving Cobra even more confused then before.

**Cobra isn't going to get any answers, is he? He should be used to it, though. He hangs around Meredy. Give me reviews, put the request in the reviews, and sayonara.**


	9. Warren and Cobra

**This was something that arose from last chapter and a PM conversation with Dragon'sHost. Lucy and mind readers just don't mix.**

The two sat next to each other, watching the usual Fairy Tail madness, especially the blonde currently kicking Cana into a wall. Apparently, the woman had been spiking Lucy's drink, and as a result Lucy had nearly kissed Grey. Juvia was being physically restrained.

As Lucy began to shout, both winced.

"And I though _Meredy _had a weird mind."

"Lucy's an enigma."

"How do you stand being in the guild with her around?"

"I don't. I went crazy a long time ago."

"Oh no. Natsu's talking to her."

"Here we go ag- HAPPY AND MIRAJANE RUN."

And with that, both Cobra and Warren shot out of the guild doors to go find some very strong alcohol. It was going to most certainly be necessary.

**You know, I'm not sure being able to always read people's minds would be such a good thing. Especially if you lived in the Fairy Tail world, were the best of people have stripping problems. Sayonara!**


	10. Ichiya and Yuka's Eyebrows

**My head hurts. I was just informed that it would be hard to become more original then Cobra and Warren. And then I went on tumblr and saw a picture of Yuka's even bigger eyebrows and remembered that picture of Ichiya taking over the world and…this was born.**

**The Sparkles belong to Dragon'sHost. I bear no claim to them.**

**I regret nothing.**

_INSIDE THE GIANT PINK AND BLACK BALLOON FLOATING IN THE ATMOSPHERE_

Cackles were heard from the bowels of the ship, where an unspeakable horror hailed from. If you daredlook any deeper then the first level, you would see awful, awful things.

A large room, full of nothing but Master Bob pillows.

A jail room, where those who dared oppose the horror were taken and made to listen to Taylor Swift songs for days.

A hallway of cages, where glittering, glowing, golden Sparkles lay, calling out, screaming for you to look into them, _deep _into them…

A room full of shelves with eyebrow brushes, perfumed eyebrow brushes, full of the darkest, blackest, thickest hair.

But the worst is in a room of Lacrima Screens, with its drones flickering throughout the world, the army ready to be awakened at any moment. And in a pink, plushy, Master Bob-ified swivel chair, a troll sits, a horrible troll. And on this troll sits eyebrows, giant eyebrows, controlling the legion, commanding the Sparkles. It wears white suits, and holds roses, but you cannot be fooled- it is a foul creature.

Its cry is the cry of _parfum_, innocent sounding, but if you listen closely, full of the sounds of screaming, traumatized creatures, their pureness forever abandoned in favor of madness…

And from within its lair, it cackles, the eyebrows and the troll in one voice.

"Soon."

**I still regret nothing.**

**And yes. The troll is Ichiya, and the eyebrows are Yuka's.**


	11. Cobra and Assorted (Annoying) Girls

**Here's another request I'm getting to. **

"So, this is a girl's night out, right?"

"Right!"

"But I'm not a girl."

"Mirajane specially requested your presence."

Cobra groaned. The She-Devil had not let up on her constant attempts to make Cobra help her with her matchmaking. So far, she had only made progress when Kinana was around. But she hadn't figured that one out yet, and Cobra did not intend to let her. He had a reputation to maintain.

Unfortunately, Kinana would be here. Probably with that creepy best friend of hers. Joy.

"Fairy Hills is a stupid name for a dormitory," was his next sentence.

"Well, we didn't invent it."

Angel and Meredy had also been invited to this little gathering, and had been given the task of retrieving Cobra. Why did Meredy have to have the ability to link senses again?

"Kinana's going to be there."

"Shut up. Or I'll poison you."

Meredy grinned and let go of his hand. Dramatically jumping onto a nearby bench, she shrieked, "And then, Ultear's ghost will haunt you! FOREVER!", before jumping off and attempting to tackle Cobra. He moved, and she landed on Angel, who punched her.

"If Ultear's ghost is haunting people who hurt you, I think Angel is next."

Angel threw Meredy at him.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The girls were holding their Satanic rituals, oh sorry, _meeting,_ on the beach outside of that dormitory.

Cobra asked why there was only a girl's dormitory. Naturally, no one bothered to answer him.

"Oh, good, good! Angel and Meredy have arrived, and they've brought our special guest!"

Cobra could hear her thoughts. 'Finally! Finally, I will get answers! Cobra won't evade me this time. Or only consent to tell me who Juvia likes. At the very least I'll get Erza. And then Lucy! And then maybe my lovely purple-haired friend….'

She was NOT getting Erza. Not as long as Jellal and Cobra were in the same guild. There was no way he was listening to Lucy's mind again. And Cobra, despite still having problems listening to her thoughts, had a sneaking suspicion who Kinana liked, and had no intention of saying anything.

Wait. Why was Happy here? And was that Yukino? Yep, away goes Angel and out comes Sorano. Cobra hoped that Mirajane didn't plan on questioning Yukino about her particular crush, as that was a prime way for Angel to come back. And then Cobra would have to physically restrain her, and that woman's nails were _long._ Maybe he should corrode them while she was sleeping.

At Mirajane's signal (signals, now? This was a ritual.), all the girls came to sit in a circle around a Lacrima screen. Of course Kinana had to sit next to him. And she brought…..Lisa? Lily? Laki. That girl's mind was terrifying. It was almost as bad as Oracion Seis-Angel. And Oracion-Seis Angel sat in her room, writing down new ways to kill people with household objects, and then tested them. On bunnies. Apparently bunnies, being white, would go be angels, and so she was doing them a favor.

Actually, it wasn't nearly as horrifying.

"Alright ladies, Meredy and Happy will be assisting me tonight. Meredy, who's up first?"

"Juv- never mind, we already know that one. Why is Bisca in this pile? She's **married**. Wendy's twelve, Mira. Oh, here's a good one. LUCY!"

Lucy jumped seven feet in the air. Meredy was excellent at yelling.

"Natsu, duh."

"Everyone sees it."

"Yeah, is this seriously contested? Obviously it's Natsu."

"See, Juvia? I told you she's not a love rival."

"Juvia supposes Meredy-san might be right."

Mirajane looked expectantly at Cobra.

"I already told you, I am NEVER looking in that girl's mind again."

"I have a name, you know!"

The Take-Over mage shook her head. "You'll answer eventually."

Meredy took out another card. Gajeel's face appeared on the screen.

"Levy, you're up!"

"Who could it be but Levy-chan!"

"G-g-guys! Stop it!"

Mirajane gave him pleading eyes. "Fine. Levy's a good liar."

Half the girls in the circle fainted. Women were certainly strange, strange creatures. Cobra would give Mirajane that one. But when Erza came…

"No one."

Cobra was surprised she could say that with a straight face. Well, most of her face. Her eyes were giving death glares to Angel and Meredy, who had both started smiling wickedly.

"Are you ssuuurreee about that?"

Of course it was Happy.

"I'm very sure. And if anyone says otherwise, I will rain swords upon them."

Wendy had the audacity to snicker. Erza didn't dare rain swords on the child. No one else moved a muscle. Cobra, Meredy, or Angel were quite capable of taking on Erza in a fight, but then they'd have to face Jellal. Who would probably Sema them, Ultear's ghost or no Ultear's ghost.

Having a meteor dropped on your head was no fun.

So Meredy read the next card.

"Mere- hey, wait a minute, why am I in here?"

"There's cards for everyone here! Even Yukino's got one!"

Oh no. Angel's head swiveled nearly 180 degrees to look at Meredy. "You put a card for Yukino?"

"Well, yeah! I mean, she hangs around with the Twin Dragons all the time, she's got to have a thing for one of them!"

"I bet it's Sting. He's a Natsu clone, Yukino's a Lucy clone. A nicer Lu-"

Whoever said that didn't finish her sentence, as Angel had leapt into the air to be her usual protective self, with a warcry. Luckily, Cobra and Meredy had a protocol for that. Cobra snatched Angel out of the air and knocked her out quite thoroughly, while Meredy took off like a rocketship to warn Sting to watch corners and rooftops for a few weeks, and possibly carry a can of Mace.

Somehow, he knew it would end like this. Why did he hang around Fairy Tail again?

Oh right. Kinana. (But Mirajane especially didn't need to know that.)

**Sting's going to have a problem. A serious one. Review, request, and all that. Sayonara!**


	12. Bonus! The Dragonslayers

**I've been seeing all these things about the Dragonslayers having little get togethers, so I decided to jump on the bandwagon. It's probably going to be really, really random. **

**Takes place after Fairy Tail reforms the guild(because it WILL happen)**

It had started out as just Natsu and Gajeel, who had been in the same bar that wasn't Fairy Tail's one night, and one of the people in the bar was talking about dragons, and instead of fighting the two sort of just exchanged a half smile.

They seemed to end up there together a lot after that, and would often just sit in silence, the fact that there was someone else who knew what that pain had felt like, the realization that Igneel and Metallicana had been gone, and weren't coming back.

Eventually, Laxus had been there too one night, and asked, off-hand, what dragons were like. They had, a bit reluctantly but less so as they went on, told him all about their two dragons, and soon he would join them in these (mostly) silent reminisces.

Sting and Rogue, almost unsurprisingly, were there too, often, and one time when Crime Sorciere was around Laxus (with whom he had struck up an unlikely friendship) dragged him along. Cobra had almost enjoyed it.

It was funny, because the Dragonslayers had a sort of bond that no one else seemed to have, even though they were spread out over the guilds. They all knew (even Laxus and Cobra, honestly) what it felt like to be basically abandoned, and relished in the fact that there were others that knew what it felt like to be left behind. And this became even more important to them after the dragons had come back and promptly disappeared.

Natsu had always said he felt a little bad that Wendy didn't join them, but Wendy was twelve, and Erza and Charle and Lucy would probably accuse them of "corrupting" her, and kill them, and probably be totally justified in it.

That changed the night that the bar that they usually ended up in shutdown and they ended up on a hillside, which was funny because they never seemed to plan these, it just happened.

The six were sitting in silence when a blue-haired girl ran up the hill, looking a bit flustered.

"Found you!" she announced cheerfully.

"Wendy? What are you doing here?" Gajeel inquired. "And you don't have the cat with you."

"I know you guys have been hanging around. Without me. I'm a Dragonslayer too, you know. And DON'T tell me it's because I'm twelve. That's what Charle said, and I thoroughly resent it."

Laxus opened his mouth, but Wendy simply continued talking.

"And besides, I'm a _girl_. You'd be quite idiotic to pass up a chance to create a possible source of information of, shall we say, _certain females_."

It was official. Wendy had been spending way too much time in Mirajane Strauss's company. Or Meredy's. Or Happy's. Whichever. However…

"You have a point," Sting decided,

that did not mean they were going to give up that sort of opportunity.

The rest nodded. "Wendy wins."

The Sky Dragonslayer looked very pleased with herself. Definitely Mirajane.

"So I can stay? Just don't let Charle find out I'm here. She's convinced you'll corrupt me."

Laxus, Cobra, Natsu, and Gajeel looked at each other. There was an excellent chance Charle, as stated before, was completely correct. There was also an excellent chance Rogue and Sting would have nothing to do with it.

Of course, Wendy was in Fairy Tail. And if Charle didn't think she was corrupted by now, the Exceed was kidding herself.

**I have an essay I'm supposed to be writing. I don't want to write essays. So I'm writing fanfiction. It's still writing.**

**Mirajane has gotten to everyone. And Meredy and Happy help.**

**Also, I still haven't gotten over what the heck happened to Charle in Chapter 420. And there was no Ren and Sherry. Am I the only one upset by that?**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated, and so are requests. Sayonara! (also, I found out what language that's from. Japanese. I'm ashamed to say I thought it was Spanish)**


	13. Rufus, Freed, and Mard Geer

**I asked TheLibraryWitch for a challenge, and did they deliver. Luckily, I was feeling slightly insane today, and therefore arose this.**

**Set after everyone has died. And yes, that was the only setting I could think where this would happen.**

_IN LIMBO_

Three men sat in a circle in a desolate landscape. It was quiet, with not a soul to be found. Quite literally, as there were only souls here. There was the occasional rock dotting the horizon, but mostly there was only the three men and the stone benches they sat on.

Their faces portrayed a strange mix of sadness and acceptance. Besides their expressions, they were very different. One was green-haired, with a sword hanging by his side. One was blonde, with a fantastically in-style hat. The last had black hair, and radiated an air of evil, though less pronounced than it would have been had he been alive. Silence continued to reign in the area, a soft wind whistling through the grey-green grass, rustling it around their feet.

A red-haired woman appeared on the scene in a flash tinged with gold, seemingly out of nowhere, though none of the men seemed to care. She had quite revealing armor on (could it even be called armor?) and held a sword, much bigger than the green-haired man's, in her right hand. As she walked over, the one with the hat looked up.

"Banished from heaven?"

"Yep."

"Too fabulous hair?" was the apparently expected question, as the woman did not seemed surprised.

"They couldn't handle it." came the reply.

The man with black hair patted the fourth bench, the one next to him, while the other two exchanged sympathetic looks.

"Don't worry. We're all in the same boat."

And so she sat, and the breeze was once more the only sound.

**This sounds like it's trying to be deep and angsty, but really it's just ridiculous. Of course, in a story about people being banished for fabulous hair, Erza Knightwalker was going to make an appearance. Her pre-Ch. 187 hair was beautiful. **

**I've noticed that these tend to be short. They always seem so much shorter when you look at the word count. Anyone else noticed that?**

**I love getting reviews(hint hint). **

**Make a request in one if you'd like(though PMs are fine too)**

**Sayonara!**


	14. Wendy and Mirajane

**I just want to take this opportunity to thank all the people following/favoriting/reviewing this story. It really means a lot that you've chosen this particular story to read. Thanks!**

I also apologize for not updating. First there was school, and then there were a few other things I've been writing. But regular updates shall now resume.

**Fulfilling another request! This one was made by Digi-FanCatt. **

**Mirajane breaks the fourth wall. That is a very, very bad thing.**

Special Operative Wendy slipped into the shipping base beneath the guildhall to find Mirajane screaming. (Meredy was out of town with her guild. She said something about hunting unicorns, tea parties, and Jellal looked pained. Wendy didn't bother asking.)

"Mira! What's wrong!?"

Mirajane pointed in horror to the screen, gasping for breath. "It's awful! Look at this!"

Up on the screen was a story, that seemed to be about….."Kagurza?"

"Apparently Kagura and Erza went out on a date! And Jellal didn't have any comments! What's wrong!? What's happening!? Have I been wrong all this time!?"

Wendy looked at the web address and sighed. "Miraja-"

She was cut off, as Mira had resumed shrieking.

"And what is this!? Lucy's going out with Rogue!? No! That can't be! And Sting is DEFINITELY not dating Lisanna. I would know. And he'd be dead. And she's not dating Bixlow either! They've barely even talked!"

Wendy tried to take the Take-Over mage's hand off the keyboard, but Mira was too lost in despair to notice.

"I know, Wendy, I know, this is going to be hard to- WHAT!? LUCY'S CHEATING ON ROGUE WITH FLARE, LAXUS IS COMPETING FOR FLARE'S LOVE, AND NATSU ASKED JUVIA OUT!? **ROMANTICALLY?!**"

"Mirajane! Look at thi-"

She was once more cut off as the eldest Strauss pointed a shaking finger at the screen. "I was convinced my brother liked Evergreen. Convinced! Beyond all. Possible. DOUBT. So how, how, how is he currently courting LUCY?! HOW MANY PEOPLE IS LUCY DATING!? Even Hibiki, Lyon, Levy, and [omitted] MINERVA ARE ON THERE! Wait, no! Levy was supposed to date Gajeel! MEREDY DOESN'T HAVE A BOYFRIEND, AND IT'S CERTAINLY NOT ROGUE!"

She began to sob hysterically. "I've been missing all the signs! So has Happy. We're awful excuses for shi-i-i-pe-e-e-ers," before putting her head down on the keyboard. And accidentally typing in Grey's name. As she lifted her head up, she looked at the screen.

Wendy was _never _getting out of here. The scream Mirajane released was heard all the way in the Principality of Veronica.

"NONONONONONONONONONO. NO. NO. How. Is. This. Possible!?"

She looked at Wendy, her eyes wide, terrified, and full of panic.

"It can't be. It can't. You know what can't be? Do you know?"

Wendy decided she might as well oblige her. "What?"

"GREY IS CURRENTLY DATING LUCY, ERZA, ULTEAR, MEREDY, YUKINO, LYON, JUVIA, NATSU, CHELIA AND SHERRY, CANA, LEVY, ANGEL, LISANNA, HIBIKI, DAPHNE, KAGURA, AND LOKE!"

Wendy looked at the screen.

"And both Sugarboys," she helpfully pointed out.

...

...

Mirajane fell over in a dead faint.

_UPSTAIRS, IN THE FAIRY TAIL GUILD HALL_

Juvia, who had been talking to Lucy, suddenly sat straight up, her eyes twitching.

"Juvia….." Lucy asked slowly, no doubt wondering what had startled the water mage.

Juvia sniffed the air, and listened for a second.

"Juvia senses love rivals! Juvia must protect Grey-sama!"

The Fairy Tail guild all, in unison, turned their heads and said, "Grey, run."

**Poor Wendy. Poor Grey. Poor the entire Fairy Tail universe, after Mirajane(without listening to Wendy) runs up the stairs to interrogate everyone. She's determined enough that she not only drags several members of Lamia Scale, Blue Pegasus, Sabertooth, and Mermaid Heel to Fairy Tail to question, she tracks down Crime Sorciere, breaks Daphne out of prison, and literally threatens Edo-Sugarboy out of his dimension. Talk about dedication. **

**Review the chapter, review the rest of the chapters, and make a request for your personal BroTP! Sayonara!**


	15. Wendy and The Twin Dragons

**Aaaaand yet another request! It's funny, because I was going to do this even if someone didn't request it. I mean, does anyone else find it hilarious that the Twin Dragons and Wendy were born in the SAME YEAR? **

Wendy had decided to take on a job by herself. Lucy was shopping with Yukino and Lisanna, Natsu and Happy were very busy fishing, and Grey had been "coerced" into doing a job with Juvia(because everyone knew he didn't mind at all). Even Charle wasn't with her, as Happy had begged and begged for her to come fishing with them, and Wendy had told her she would be perfectly fine on her own.

She was beginning to regret that statement, as the one bandit she had been assigned to catch had somehow multiplied into twenty.

"Sky Dragon's ROARRRRRR!"

And for every one she knocked out, two seemed to take it's place. "The Hydra" was a very appropriate name. And not only was that a problem, but she was causing as much destruction as Natsu. Well, maybe not _quite _as much. It was lucky that she was the Sky Dragonslayer. She had an unlimited amount of air. Of course, she did not have an unlimited amount of endurance. And that was the main obstacle at the moment. Maybe she should manipulate Gajeel into helping her train. Or Laxus….

Her train of thought was cut off as one of the bandits kicked her legs out from under her. She was thrown into a wall, and her dress caught on a hook, allowing another bandit to blast her(and the wall) very painfully into the air.

Barely managing to pick herself up, she surveyed the situation. There were more of them every second. That had NOT been in the job flyer. She and the mayor were going to have words about this. Or not. Wendy wasn't very good at negotiating. Or being assertive. Of course, first she would have to get out of this. It seemed quite hopeless at the moment.

Thank Mavis for insane Dragonslayer hearing.

The Twin Dragons burst on to the scene, quickly taking out several of the extremely surprised bandits. Seeing the two reputable mages and remembering what trouble they had been having with the twelve-year-old, Hydra fled. Far, far, away.

_TWENTY OR SO MINUTES LATER_

"Thank you so, so, so much!" Wendy exclaimed, looking at the jewels she held.

Sting, Rogue and their Exceeds had helped Wendy up, and then "helped" her convince the mayor that he was not allowed to charge Fairy Tail for the damages or take the money out of Wendy's reward, since he had given false information. (Really, they let Wendy do all the negotiating, and just stood there giving the mayor dark glares. Frosch and Lector did their best ones, too.)

They then offered to take Wendy to the little bakery for cookies. The blue-haired girl had tried to refuse, but Wendy couldn't resist the call of cookies. She was currently enjoying her third(and was now actually happy Charle hadn't come along. Charle wouldn't let her have more than two.)

"Say, Sting-sama?" she asked, looking at the blonde Dragonslayer. He gestured for her to go on. "How come you're on a job? Aren't you the guild master of Sabertooth?"

Sting waved a dismissive hand. "It's Rogue's job. We were coming back from it. I can't bring myself to stay in the guild all the time. So Lector and I tagged along. Speaking of which, where's Charle?"

Lector nodded. "I had been looking forward to seeing that lovely Exceed again."(Sting and Rogue rolled their eyes.)

"Happy convinced her to go fishing with him and Natsu(Lector looked murderous). I said I could do this on my own, and she should go enjoy herself," she rubbed her head sheepishly, "evidently I was wrong."

"It's not your fault," Rogue told her reassuringly(or as reassuringly as Rogue could get). "You didn't have all the information."

"I know, I know. It's just….Natsu or Gajeel or Laxus or either of you could have taken care of it really easily. I'm the weakest Dragonslayer." she sighed.

"Hey, cheer up," Sting told her. Lector nodded. "You're probably the one of the strongest mages in your age group, if not the strongest. We've all had years to train on you, that's the only reason you aren't as strong. I mean, you held off a dragon all on your own at the Grand Magic Games. Don't feel bad." Wendy considerably brightened at that. Rogue, however looked deep in thought.

"And you know, you're only the youngest Dragonslayer because of the timeskip. If Acnologia hadn't attacked the island, we would be the same age you are." The five stared at each other as that sunk in.

"Wow." Wendy finally said.

"That's an awfully strange thought." Sting and Lector said in unison.

"Fro thinks so too!"

_LATER THAT DAY, IN THE FAIRY HILLS BATH_

"...and then Rogue pointed out that we'd be the same age if not for Acnologia and Fairy Sphere! Isn't that a weird thought?"

The rest of the girls looked at each other. Finally, Lucy walked over and patted her on the head sorrowfully.

"I am so, so sorry."

Wendy was very confused. "What?"

"You could have been dating _Sting_." Kinana said flatly.

Wendy was still very, very confused, as Charle tried to scratch Kinana and Lucy's eyes out, splashing hot water all over Erza, who freaked, requipped, and sent swords flying all over the place, which caused Evergreen's glasses to fall off and turn Levy to stone, which caused Lucy to shriek, which scared everyone out of their wits and made the three boys attempting to peek fall off the wall with a resounding CRASH, and made Juvia send boiling water over everyone, which made Erza throw **more **swords, and…...you get the idea.

**That was fun to write. Poor Lector will never earn Charle's love. Frosch attempting to do a death glare would be hilariously adorable. And we should all feel sorry for Wendy.**

***does Gollum voice* Give me my precious…..reviews….requests…**

**Sayonara!**


	16. Cobra and Zancrow

**Someone made this request, and I can't remember who. I feel like a terrible person. Oh well. **

Cobra did not understand what the point of this was.

They weren't even really an alliance. So why did the three guild masters of Oracion Seis, Grimoire Heart, and Tartaros(although those demons were convinced that book Geer was always carrying was their guild master. Demons were extremely strange) insist on having these meetings? From what he heard, they sort of just sat in there and discussed whatever light guild happened to annoy them the most the past month or two. Most of the time it was Fairy Tail.

Fairies were very annoying, Cobra decided.

Sometimes he really hated being able to hear people's thoughts. It was excellent for screwing with the rest of the Oracion Seis, but Brain made him come to _every single one_ of these meetings so he could learn what the other two guilds were planning. It was a smart tactic- he wasn't Brain for nothing- but it was most certainly not Cobra's ideal circumstances. At least he had Cubelios.

Her head suddenly perked up, and Cobra immediately scanned the surroundings. Two of Grimoire Heart's elite was walking down the hallway in Grimoire Heart's airship, where they were having this particular meeting(the three guilds rotated. Cobra had always found Tartaros's base…...interesting.). A man with spiky blonde hair and a little girl with pink hair. She was ten, if what Cobra was hearing was correct, and it had been her birthday yesterday. Lucky her.

"I already told you, Ultear's in her room. If you want her, go there."

"I am aware of that. I was asking where Rustyrose is."

"Why would you want to find him? I don't wanna listen to a sonnet or whatever he spouts off."

"They are not sonnets. They are descriptive three/four-line poems," …...Meredy, that was it, replied flatly. "And as you can see, my headpiece broke. I requested that he create a new one."

…..Zancrow (as her thoughts said) rolled his eyes. "Well, he's in his room. Go on."

A Godslayer? A fire one? Now that was interesting. Cobra had heard of Godslaying magic in his studies of Dragonslaying, but hadn't paid much attention. Apparently the other man was just as interested in meeting a Dragonslayer. And was also certifiably insane, if his thoughts were any indication.

"You're the Oracion Seis's Dragonslayer, right? What're you doing here?"

Cobra indicated the snake, who spread her wings. "Transportation." That was their general story. It worked.

The other Dark Mage got right to the point. "Ever seen a dragon?"

"Ever seen a god?" Cobra answered rhetorically.

"Not a god, but definitely a demon, if Tartaros's average wizard is anything."

Cobra doubted that any of Grimoire Heart knew that Tartaros actually were demons, created by Zeref, etc, etc. It was ironic that no one else had figured this out, because one had horns, one had talons for feet and hands, and one had four arms. However, he simply nodded in response. Zancrow was obviously also bored and had decided Cobra would be an interesting conversation companion. Cobra could oblige.

"Is the snake poisonous?"

"Considering that she's killed everyone she bites slowly and painfully, very."

The Godslayer grinned at that. Those were some _very _interesting thoughts. Torturing your enemies was fun, yes, but…...his initial assumption of certifiably insane seemed to be spot on.

Although, any of them would probably be labeled certifiably insane if the Magic Council ever caught them. Which of the odds were extremely thin.

Zancrow tried to touch Cubelios. She snapped at him. Cobra sighed. "Don't try. She's a ruthless killing machine. Who does not appreciate anyone except me touching her."

This caused him to remember a very entertaining time when the Oracion Seis were still kids, and Angel fell on top of the snake. Cubelios was not amused, and spent the next week haunting Angel. Angel _hated _snakes now, for some strange reason.

Unsurprisingly, the Grimoire Heart mage nodded approvingly. "Ruthless killing machine is a good thi- what is it, Meredy?"

"Rustyrose isn't in his room. Ultear said he wasn't actually here. I told her you lied to me. She's annoyed."

Zancrow looked scared. Judging from the girl's smug expression and his thoughts, Ultear was a very scary person. Cobra believed it. He knew a few things about the Arc of Time Mage, and she sounded exceedingly unnerving. Especially from the murderous thoughts coming from the right.

"You may want to run." Meredy said in a voice that screamed I AM NOT CHEERFUL OFTEN.

Zancrow took her advice and took off. He was just in the nick of time, as a woman with straight black hair came stalking around the corridor. She didn't waste time questioning Cobra as to the reason for his presence.

"Where did he go."

Meredy, Cobra, and Cubelios pointed right.

**Welp, Zancrow's doomed. At least Zeref killed him instantly. Ultear wasn't a ****dark mage**** for nothing.**

**I can't believe this story went three entire chapters without Cobra. I think it's a new record. **

**I absolutely LOVE it when people review stories(hint hint nudge nudge). And a request is good too. Sayonara!**


	17. Jellal and Meredy

**Turns out, it was Ein ni Touko who requested Cobra/Zancrow. And C****hartruese requested this one. I get to write more Crime Sorciere!**

"Why do I have to come?" Jellal inquired of his pink-haired guildmate, as she dragged him through the sidestreets of Magnolia.

"We are near Magnolia. I want to see Juvia. You want to see Erza. Therefore, you are coming."

"I never said I wan-"

"You know you want to." sang the Maguilty Sense mage, as she caught sight of a blue-haired woman and broke into a run. "Besides, you won't let me go anywhere by myself-"

"For a good reason, the last time you bought three bags of sugar, ate them all, and shrieked "Everything Is Awesome" for _six hours straight_!"

"-and Angel went to see Yukino and Cobra vanished(probably to wherever he and Kinana agreed to meet, wish I had special telepathy or whatever), and Racer, Midnight, and Hoteye were in the middle of Go Fish. So you were the only option." Meredy continued, as if he had not said anything, which was what she usually did.

"I have this sneaking suspicion you planned it that way." Meredy chose to ignore him, in favor of tackling Juvia, and by extension, Grey.

"Oh! Meredy! what are you do- JUVIA IS SITTING ON GREY-SAMA JUVIA IS SO SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE JUVIA….."

While Juvia wailed in the background and Meredy patted her head and screamed at Grey to "come and comfort her or I'll rip your throat out", Grey decided to go talk to the sane member of the two.

"So what are you two doing here?"

"We were near Magnolia and Meredy decided that a visit was necessary. I was dragged along."

"Why you?"

"She insisted."

"Why?"

Jellal looked at Grey a little closer. Was he…..smirking? Oh, no. Oh, no no no no.

"What did Meredy tell you?"

"Noth-"

Jellal raised a threatening finger and the air began to swirl forebodingly around the Ice-Make mage. "Ok, ok! She's apparently convinced that you and Erza are the 'ultimate couple, meant to be together but kept apart because JELLAL IS A [deleted] IDIOT.' And she enjoys explaining why."

"Please tell me she said nothing about a beach."

"She said everything about a beach."

Jellal suddenly looked nervous.

"And Mirajane..uh...may or may not have been...within...earshot."

Now Jellal looked even more nervous.

"And….Erza."

The Heavenly Body mage stared at Grey for a good twenty seconds. He then proceeded to grab Meredy off of Juvia and stalk off, the pink-haired girl (who had heard every second of the conversation) wailing, "I'm just trying to help you don't even appreciate my efforts it's _not _ making your life harder well that's just 'cause you're too idiotic to do it yourself NO NOT SEMA ANYTHING BUT THAT _**NO NOT THE CANDY NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"**_

The two Fairy Tail wizards looked at each other, and then decided to go warn Happy and tell him to never, ever, mention the beach, anywhere.

**Sema is a very scary thing. Especially when candy is at the center of the blast and you're Meredy. Happy, keep your mouth shut, or the fish is next. **

**Everyone loves reviews, and I am no different. The same goes for requests for broships. Let's get some interesting ones!**

**Sayonara!**


	18. Bonus! Why Natsu Can't Pick Jobs

**My sister is an excellent storyteller, so she'll make up hysterical stories about our favorite Fairy Tail characters. This was one of the crazier ones, so I decided to write it down. And expand it. And now it's even crazier.**

**For those who don't know, the seventh Jellal is a character from Rave Master(Mashima's other manga), who looks exactly like Jellal. **

**Rated E, for probable Extreme Out-Of-Characterness.**

It was Natsu's fault. Everything is always Natsu's fault. It's a fact, an accepted state of the cosmos. Why does Makarov let him _anywhere_ near the request board?

Natsu, Lucy, and Happy were looking for a job. Crime Sorciere had popped in for a visit, and were currently engaged in antagonizing Jellal about his relationship in Erza. A meteor was due to fall from nowhere any second now.

"Hey, look at this one! What's it say?"

"I don't know Natsu, you should read it!"

"NO!" Lucy yelled, snatching the paper. "Every time you guys read a weird job request, something happens! One time we switched bodies, one time we switched personalities, we got turned into dolls, and one time, ALL OF US BECAME CATS. You aren't allowed to touch it!"

Wendy grabbed it out of Lucy's hand. "Ein en galith lyresa ite fawk-en neith. What does that mean?"

"WENDY!" Lucy, Natsu, and Happy shrieked, as there was a whirling and people started to appear. There were a bunch of little kids and some teenagers, all who were happily smiling. Even worse, they all looked exactly like the people in the room.

Everyone freaked out. The little thems began to freak out too.

"I've got it!" Both Levys shouted. "The spell made our past selves appear!" No one was listening, because chaos was reigning.

The two Grey's were stripping, and the two Juvia's were fighting. Incessantly. "My Grey-sama! My Grey-sama! **MY GREY-SAMA**! _LOVE-RIVAL!_" Somehow, Lyon was also there, and was wailing about how Juvia-chan would never love him.

Jet, Droy, Wakaba, and Macao were crying about how handsome their past selves were. Said past selves were hitting on Levy and Mirajane.

Mirajane and past Mirajane were best friends already. Past Elfman and Elfman were yelling about how manly they were. Evergreen was smacking both with a fan. Freed, Bixlow and Laxus were shipping Elfgreen.

Meanwhile, Laxus and the Thunder Legion's past selves were trying to take over the guild, with a lightning storm forming in the distance. The Mirajanes locked them in a closet. Makarov caught the key.

Angel's past self was dramatically draping herself over chairs and sobbing about how she couldn't be an angel. The rest of the Oracion Seis were having a dance party in the corner. Hoteye was supplying the refreshments.

Past Kinana was a snake.

Past Gajeel was groaning about how annoying the fairies were. Both Natsus beat him up, until he caught sight of Pantherlily(whose past self was in Edolas). Both Gajeels proceeded to fight over Lily, while the two Natsu's ran around challenging everyone to a fight.

The two Lucy's were examining each other. Lucy summoned Gemini. So did past Lucy.

This created a problem. Apparently, a hole in the space-time continuum had been ripped open and now Mystogan and his past self had appeared too. Both Gemini's turned into Jellal. Another Jellal appeared, yelling something about an overdrive and Resha Valentine.

They were all wearing the same clothes. Both Erzas fainted. The Mirajanes freaked.

"How do we figure out which one is the real one!? This is a disaster!"

The Lucys were too busy yelling at the Natsus for burning their clothes to do anything about Geminis. Mystogan's past self was eliminated when he looked at the hole, shrieked ANIMA, and jumped through, taking Mystogan with him. It wasn't in time before Sugarboy slipped through, and the Juvias killed him for being a love-rival. It was very bloody.

Past Jellal was eliminated because he was in a corner, shouting about Zeref and cackling. Past Kagura and Millianna tried to kill him. The Erzas got there first and stuffed a piece of strawberry cake in his mouth, defeating him through the Mystical Power of Cake™. He consequently vanished with a villainous "NOOOOOOOOO!"

Juvias took care of the Geminis by throwing Sugarboy into them and snapping them into Lucy form. They killed them for being love rivals.

Now only the real Jellal and the random guy who appeared were left. Meredy asked them what they thought of Erza. The one that didn't respond with a high-pitched "Erza?" was booted from the scene. Unfortunately, past Ultear chose this moment to appear.

As sad piano music started playing in the background(where is that coming from? asked Lucy) and it began to rain(from the Juvias' love-rival tears), the two Meredy's ran in slow motion to cling to her legs, with both crying. Past Ultear suddenly seemed to notice she didn't have a future counterpart, and her expression changed to one of despair. Then past Mirajane and past Elfman caught sight of Lisanna, and they started crying too. The dragons flew overhead, and all the dragonslayers started wailing. Then, Lucy looked at the other Lucy's key ring. There it was- Aquarius's key.

So naturally, Lucy started crying too.

Charle looked over at Happy. He had a mini-keyboard, and was tapping out long, sorrowful notes one at a time, with a completely expressionless face. "...What are you doing?"

"Setting the mood, obviously," Happy replied flatly. "I thought music was required."

Both Gajeels started playing guitar. "YOU'RE RUINING OUR SORROW!" screamed all the mourners, their counterparts, and the dead ones, shooting at max speed over to murder the two in cold blood.

Levy was screaming for everyone to shut up so she could finish figuring out the counterspell, which made all the past selves panic, as they didn't want to disappear. So Levy became the new target, and she tossed her work to Freed, praying he'd be able to finish it before she was destroyed. He grabbed it, and dramatically ran out the guild doors, chased as all of the real people began to try and kill their past selves. It was the battle of legends, the one that would go down in history, the one that was mostly fought through hair-pulling, crying, slow-motion action shots, long speeches, and Mystical Power of Cake™.

It looked like Freed would be decimated and The Last Hope™ would be ended, when an adorable little blue-haired girl stood up.

Past Wendy had arrived. Her eyes were big and sorrowful, filled with tears at the suffering that was being caused. Her mouth turned into a sad and adorable frown, as she began to speak.

"Don't you see all the suffering you're causing with your pointless fighting?" she asked. "We should all be working together, and learning to live in harmo-"

She was cut off as Freed activated the counterspell and the past people disappeared. Everyone who was previously crying began crying again. Crime Sorciere continued their dance party. Laxus was still locked in the closet.

"And this," Lucy said, ending her tirade. "Is why Natsu should never, ever be allowed by the request board ever again!"

"Hey, Lucy?" Natsu asked, holding a flyer. "What does this say?"

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

**I laughed my head off while writing this. Both me and my sister hope you do too. **

**Cobra and Meredy is next, for whoever requested it! Although the chapter may be late, I'm quite busy tomorrow.**

**Requests are closed for now, until I finish all the ones I've got. But still review! Reviews are good! Sayonara!**


	19. Cobra and Meredy

**And yet another request for Crime Sorciere! Oh, how I love them…**

Cobra didn't _plan _on spending his day helping Meredy shop for…..whatever she was shopping for. Usually, Angel went with her and they had a lovely time. But Angel had been in the middle of a training session with Jellal(the other main person dragged with Meredy). And after the sugar incident, Meredy was not allowed to go anywhere on her own. Ever. So Cobra was stuck sitting in the corner of this mall, watching Meredy examine swimsuits.

"I can't decide!" she suddenly burst out, jolting Cobra out of his musings. "Glitter or flowers? Or glittery flowers? Or maybe I should just get them both? Which one should I get?"

"I don't know. If you haven't noticed, I hate swimming."

"Yeah, you're no fun."

"Remember the reason you know Grey was the one who left chocolates on Juvia's pillow last Valentine's Day, and the risk of Erza's wrath for going near Fairy Hills."

"Actually, you're perfectly fun! And I'll just get the glitter one! We can leave now!"

Cobra's magic was the best, hands-down. Even Midnight (and Reflector) had to admit that. If you had leverage over _Meredy_, it was like ruling the universe. Mirajane, too. And Lucy, terrifyingly enough(Cobra still wasn't sure what went on in that brain, though he suspected it had something to do with being a fiction writer.)

Meredy's next attempted stop was a candy store.

"If you go within fifteen feet of that door, I will blow the whole store up. And you and I both know Jellal will consider it justified."

"The ice-cream shop too, Meredy."

"And the Coca-Cola factory. I do hope you aren't planning anything with those Mentos. Okay, good."

Unfortunately, there then proceeded to be a little store. A little store, containing not only tea, but an assortment of supplies for a tea party. There was an evil glint in Meredy's eyes, as Cobra cursed the whole godforsaken town. And Angel and Hoteye, who were insistent in standing in the way of putting tea stores on the banned list.

Twenty minutes later, he was watching Meredy and Angel(who had now somehow found the time to be here, what a surprise) sit on top of the Coca-Cola factory, sipping tea, eating scones they got from heaven knows where, and speaking in British accents. Angel had called out two of her spirits to fill the other two spots at the table. The people were beginning to notice, and one suddenly called, "It's those people who have been having tea parties on roofs and then wreaking mass havoc! Call the army! Call the police!"

Angel shook her head. "I believe it is time to cut short our gathering, darling?"

Meredy nodded primly. "I believe so, my lovelies. I will gather the necessary supplies."

And then she took out the Mentos. Cobra _knew_ he should have taken those while he had the chance. Because Angel certainly wasn't going to do anything about it, damn her.

**Meredy and Mentos just don't mix, do they? Tea parties, too. Poor Cobra. **

**Requests are closed until I've finished up the ones I've got lined up. However, please don't let that deter you from reviewing. Reviews make me all warm and fuzzy inside. **

**Sayonara!**


	20. Angel and Lucy

**Can I just point out how absolutely amazing chapter 423 was? Like, Wendy is obviously more powerful, Charle learned new magic, and Lucy can use her Celestial Spirit's powers with her Stardress! IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL.**

**This one wasn't a request, but I felt like I needed to write it, because headcanons. I guess this could be counted as Angel/Lucy/Scorpio/Gemini/Aries too. Enjoy!**

**(as an Empress of Anarchy, I must keep you on your toes by occasionally releasing feels among the funny. You will never have any warning.)**

Lucy found Angel standing on a high, high, cliff, staring at her keys.

Walking up the grassy hill to stand next to the silent mage, the blonde spoke. "Meredy's looking for you."

"Tell me," Angel said suddenly, turning to Lucy, "you don't still have Aquarius, do you?"

Lucy's expression fell, her countenance dimming, reaching inside her key case and pulling out the broken pieces of the water spirit's once majestic key.

"I thought so." the other Celestial Mage murmured. "One of my spirits mentioned it in passing conversation. It's sadly ironic, isn't it? You're the one that loves the spirits the most, and yet you've been the only one forced to give one up."

She seemed to realize what she'd said, and began to attempt to apologize. Angel still wasn't good at apologies. Apologies were usually frowned upon in her old line of work. Luckily, Lucy just might have been the most understanding person on the planet. "It's alright. I….I know what you were trying to say."

The silver-haired woman sighed a little bit. "Is she still dating Scorpio?"

Lucy looked a little brighter at that statement. "You remembered that?"

"I made it my business to know Celestial Spirit relationships. Of course, that didn't seem to do me any good in the long run, did it?"

"Well, it certainly helped you counter Aquarius and…." Lucy stopped short, leaving the sentence unfinished.

"And Leo? You don't have to avoid it. I know what I did."

Lucy stared out at the slowly lowering sun, a thoughtful expression on her face as she absentmindedly picked the petals off a daisy. A thought seemed to strike her, and she turned to Angel, a slightly curious expression on her face.

"You regret how you treated your spirits, that much I can tell. I have their keys, you know."

Angel didn't seem to get where the blonde teenager was going with this. But, yes, Lucy was right about the regret. Angel had spent a lot of her time in Crime Sorciere recontemplating her loss to Lucy. And she realized what she had always really known- she was the more experienced mage. But Lucy's spirits loved her. And that had always made all the difference.

"You could apologize to them, if you like."

Confusion flashed across the Crime Sorciere member's face. "What do you mean?"

"I could call the four out. And you could apologize."

"Four spirits at once?" the other woman asked, smiling slightly. "You've grown up, darling."

Lucy also smiled a little, taking out four keys. "So have you."

Loke, Aries, Gemini, and Scorpio appeared, looking inquisitive to why Lucy would have called four of them at once when it was so obviously peaceful. Loke spotted Angel first, narrowing his eyes at her. He knew she was with Crime Sorciere now, but after she made Aries fight him….but there was something different in her eyes, a sort of sadness, but none of the wicked sadism that had been present before.

"Why'd you call us?"

Angel looked at them for a second, and then said quietly, "I wanted to apologize."

The four spirits looked surprised, as Angel tapped her foot on the ground, nervously.

"Gemini, Scorpio, Aries…..I….." her voice trailed off. She paused for a second, and then continued, a little quieter, "I made you do horrible things while under my command. Kill, kidnap, torture…..you didn't deserve….to be made to do that. And….I'm….I'm sorry. For what I put you through. I'm glad…..you're with Lucy now," she smiled at the girl in question, "She really does love her spirits."

"And Leo, or Loke, I suppose…..I forced you to fight your best friend. That was….unforgivable. Now, I'm not Jellal, so I'm not going to tell you to kill me in penance or something ridiculous like that(Lucy giggled a little at that), but…..if you can't bring yourself to forgive me…...I understand."

"That's all."

She was obviously surprised when Aries hugged her, tightly, followed by Scorpio and Gemini. They looked at Loke expectantly, who looked thoughtful for a second, and then…

took Angel's hand, bowed down on one knee, and proceeded to praise the heavens for her newfound goodness and beauty as radiant as the stars. Aries punched him.

Lucy looked over at Angel as the other three spirits chased Loke around for "ruining their moment". She was smiling. It was a genuine smile.

Lucy smiled too.

**Aw, so feelsy! I'm pretty sure the spirits were slightly OOC, but whatever! Requests are still closed, but you can always review! Sayonara!**


	21. Wendy and Romeo

**So last chapter, our lovely friend Bluenote appeared again. Someone pointed out that since Natsu could stand under Bluenote's gravity easily like Gildarts, but Bluenote is more powerful now, Natsu is actually stronger than pre-Tenrou Gildarts. What do you guys think?**

**I can't believe this has got twenty chapters! *sighs* So many broships left to go. Thanks to all the people who have been following this story, favoriting, reviewing, etc. I just love you so much.**

**Requested VERY urgently by Deathslayer Night. Here you go!**

"Hey, uh, Wendy?"

Wendy looked over from the request board curiously. Romeo was standing there, looking a bit embarrassed. She didn't talk to him much, but they had interacted more than a few times, especially since they were the only kids (Asuka was five, so she didn't really count) in the guild. Which was weird to think about, as she had known him as a five-year-old for quite a while.

"What is it?" she asked. Charle wasn't there at the moment, as Mirajane, Erza, Lisanna, and Lucy were busy having a tea party right the middle of the usual brawl, and Charle was wherever the tea was.

"I was wondering if you could help me with something," Romeo replied, looking a bit nervous. Wendy thought for a moment, and decided to say, "Of course! What is it?"

The fire mage looked around, and then started to walk outside, Wendy following him inquisitively. "So, you know that girl about our age who's always in the guild cafe? Her name's Sadie, the one I talk to a lot?"

Wendy grinned a little. She could see where this was going, having spent more then enough time around the rest of the girls in their guild. "And you have a crush on her and want to buy her a present, and want my help picking out a gift because asking anyone else would be totally embarrassing?

Romeo was a tomato now. "Uh...well...yeah, pretty much. How did you-"

"Figure all that out? Remember who I spend time with. Now, let's see….Magnolia doesn't have that many places that would be good…..ah! Let's head to the bazaar in Sabertooth's town! That's sure to have something!"

_LATER_

Romeo looked quite overwhelmed as Wendy simultaneously sampled chocolate and explained to him why he should never give simply clothes to a girl. "If you got too big a size they might be insulted and not..mm, the vanilla is good, try some...and too small a size wouldn't fit and might...raspberry! I love raspberry!...also insult them so it's better just to...no, no, pineapple and white chocolate should never go together….give accessories or something. You got all that?" she asked, turning to Romeo with her mouth full of chocolate.

"...I think so? There's a jewelry store right by the Sabertooth guild hall, maybe we should go there?"

The Sky Dragonslayer nodded approvingly. "Excellent idea. Oh, and I can drop in and say hi to Sting-san and Rogue-san while I'm at it!"

The jewelry store was called Jemina. It was quite expensive, but luckily Romeo had gone on a job with Natsu, Lucy, and Happy(one where they did NOT destroy everything), and therefore had lots of jewels to spare. After much consideration, he selected a cute little bracelet with cats on it, which Sadie apparently liked. "Maybe we should introduce her to Charle. Or Happy. Lily would probably just intimidate her."

"Lily intimidates almost anyone. I mean, how many cats do you see with _swords _strapped to their back?"

"That's most certainly true. Want it gift wrapped?"

"That would probably be a good idea. No, I don't want hearts on the wrapping paper. Blue is fine."

"Pink."

"Ok, ok, you're the expert."

On the way back, Wendy ran into the Sabertooth guild hall to squeeze Lector and Frosch, and got pushed into the pool by Sting, who Rogue punched. Thankfully Yukino(and Romeo's fire) were there to dry her off. Wendy told Sting she'd have Natsu kill him if he did it again. Or Laxus. Sting promptly apologized, which Romeo found exceedingly entertaining.

_I really should hang out with Wendy more often_ he reflected. Of course, that was before she decided that he might as well go all out and dragged him off to buy "clothing specially for the occasion of romantic gift-giving". The girl had REALLY been spending too much time around Mirajane.

**And yet more evidence that Mirajane turns everyone into shipper. I've never shipped Rowen, but I've always thought they would be friends, so this was a lovely request to write. **

**If you have an outstanding request, don't worry, I'm getting to them. Also, I'm going to be in Florida the next few days on vacation(*cheers*), so I may not be able to update. Fortunately, I'll be able to write, so expect a bunch of chapters when I get back.**

**Review, review, review! It brightens up the day. Sayonara!**


	22. Meredy and Ultear

**Back from Florida!(and really wishing I was still there, because I have to go to school tomorrow and I didn't do any of my homework so I'm going to be up until 3am, oh well) **

**Regular updates will resume as of now(hopefully). **

"Ultear?" asked a pink-haired girl, sitting on a beach, watching a woman who was standing in the surf. She had her eyes closed, and her skirt was waving in the wind, with the waves crashing around it.

It was three months after Tenrou Island. Meredy often wondered what could of happened differently. What if she and Ultear were just a little closer, and they got killed by Acnologia too? Or what if Ultear had died before Meredy could save her? Thinking of that, she shuddered. It had happened in an ocean. Meredy established a Sensory Link.

Just in case.

Ultear looked over at her, smiling slightly. "You aren't still worried I'm going to leave you again, are you? I promised I'd never do that. And I try not to break promises." Meredy felt a sort of calm wash over her, as she walked over to stand by Ultear, shivering a bit at the cold touch of the water. She looked over at Ultear curiously, as wind and the waves grew taller all of the sudden and the former Grimoire Heart mage raised both hands in the air, sighing peacefully. Meredy felt it too. Ultear was saluting them. The fairies who had been lost to the sea- Grey, Juvia, all of them- the reason the two of them finally had a path in life, one that had meaning, without relying on hatred and revenge. She still had to ask, though.

"Ul, what are you doing?"

Ultear's eyes softened, as she looked out at the vast horizon, punctured by the rapidly rising waters.

"Hailing the waves."

Ultear broke that promise, some seven years later.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Meredy liked walking on beaches. There weren't many people on this one. It was stormy and the waters were rocky, and lightning flashed threateningly in the distance.

There were two persistent little kids, determined to save the multiple starfish washing up on the beach, unable to flop back into the water. Meredy stood for a second, watching them. Two girls. One had short hair. The other had black hair. The Maguilty Sense mage kept walking.

Hiking up her already-short dress, Meredy waded into the ocean, waves pelting her legs with icy-cold water. The sand beneath the waves was surprisingly soft, but with a few shells floating here and there. Far out, she could barely squint to see the outline of a great tree. She breathed deeply, letting the torrent of air flow through her

It was there. As long as it was there, they were all there. Scattered in the wind, maybe only in spirit, but the warmth was always there. Well, it hadn't always been there. It had vanished, and then nearly flickered away again with the attack of the demons.

She felt a tugging on her dress. Looking down, there was the short-haired girl, having abandoned the starfish in favor of the apparently more interesting teenager standing in the sea. The water nearly reached up to the girl's shoulders.

"What're you doing?"

But it had reappeared. And then hadn't vanished again.

"Hailing the waves."

**Review!**

**REQUESTS ARE CLOSED UNTIL I FINISH THE ONES I HAVE LINED UP. **


	23. Grey and Sting

**This was requested by someone. Once more, I can't remember who and my school computer blocks this site, so I can't check. **

**Also, I have had some people PM me with requests for romantic ships. Please note the name of this fic.(Pus, I suck at writing serious romance, and while I've been practicing, I'm definitely not ready to publish anything yet.)**

Sting thanked whatever god was up there for the existence of Grey Fullbuster. It was funny, because usually that was Natsu-san's spot. But the fangirls were overwhelming.

Sting and Rogue had always had a lot of fans, some more extreme than the others. Rogue would either distract them with cute Frosch antics or hide in the shadows. Sting simply established a reputation as a player and had a new girlfriend every other week, deterring them somewhat. However, that reputation could not stand with his new position as Guild Master. What made it worse is about 80% of the females who tried to join Sabertooth were fangirls. And Sting had to meet with them. Every. Single. One. (And no, Rogue, asking Yukino out would not help. Especially because he did not have a crush on her. Definitely not.*Lector laughs hysterically*)

So Sting seeked out Grey, the master of dealing with fangirls in a way that did not involve having seventeen girlfriends. AKA, the Trimens and Loke. He never seemed to have to deal with them. Girls just left him alone.

"Grey?"

"Fangirls?"

"How did you know?"

The Ice-Make mage pointed to the group of giggling girls running towards the Sabertooth guild hall. Sting sighed. There went another two hours of his time. And then there was the paperwork (he was convinced Rogue destroyed half of that on purpose just to annoy him). "Fair point. From what I understand, you have half of the teenage girls on the planet swooning for you and yet you never seem to be inconvenienced in any way. How?"

He looked at Grey, who had a face crossed between exasperation and amusement. Sting was quite confused. "What is it?"

"Let me tell you a story. I doubt you would have remembered, but about seven and a half years ago I had all the problems you have. Mostly I either endured them or started a fight with Natsu to get away. He's an excellent excuse. Same with Erza. Though I wasn't suicidal enough to challenge her constantly like Flame-Brain."

Sting looked a bit affronted at the insulting of his idol, but he let Grey continue.

"Then, Fairy Tail defeated Phantom Lord, and Juvia joined Fairy Tail. All the fangirls suddenly disappeared."

The White Dragonslayer instantly understood. "Oh."

"She's infinitely less obsessive now, but they're all still terrified of what she might do to them. Especially after the Tea Party Incident."

Sting didn't dare ask. "So what do you think I should do?"

"Get a Juvia. Just don't be Lyon and try and steal mi-Fairy Tail's."

Sting smirked as he walked away. Time to report to Mirajane!

After escaping the fangirls, of course. Maybe he should learn Transformation Magic…

**A little slip-up there, eh, Grey? Mirajane's gotten to Sting, too...I'm pretty sure she's got everyone not in a major pairing on the payroll. And apparently, Juvia shouldn't be allowed near tea sets either. Poor fangirls…..**

**Tell me what you think the Tea Party Incident was in the reviews!**

**REQUESTS ARE STILL CLOSED.**

**Read this chapter, read all the other chapters, review all ones you liked! Sayonara!**


	24. Bonus! The Dragonslayers Play Pokemon

**Sorry I didn't update yesterday. I had a choir concert. We sang the absolute stupidest songs. Like seriously. Who picks these things out? The only good part was "Circle of Life". We even had a Simba doll! **

**This is another sister-inspired chapter. I was playing Pokemon while we were talking about Fairy Tail, and we were talking about how Laxus should have a Pikachu because all the other Dragonslayers have pets, and she just started story-telling.**

The Dragonslayers did many things at their irrationally-scheduled meetings. However, one of the most prevalent was something you would probably not expect.

Pokemon cards.

"No! Electric is obviously the best!"

The eternal battle was raging. Every time, it was always invoked, always started by some rogue comment, and it. Never. Ended. Each Dragonslayer had a different favorite type. I think you can guess who liked what.

"Um, how about no? If you don't think Fairy is the best, you have a serious problem." Wendy was standing on a table, her hands on her hips and a superior expression. The people running the bar had eventually learned that nothing they did was going to keep Wendy out, so when she was with the rest they just threw up their hands and gave her juice.

"The people who don't like Steel types are the ones with a problem, Wendy. So you're the problem. _And_ the rest of you!"

"FIRE BURNS STEEL! AND FAIRY WINGS! AND ELECTRIC CORDS! AND WHATEVER ELSE YOU GUYS THROW AT IT!"

"Yeah, but electric Pokemon don't need electric cords to attack, you idiot. Your argument is _completely _off." Laxus told the Fire Dragonslayer, pointing a finger at him from the chair he was reclining on.

"It can't burn darkness, either." Rogue added.

Natsu laughed at that. "Yeah, but it can burn dark POKEMON. The Pokemon aren't made out of darkness! And anyway, dark is the EVIL type! And so's poison, Cobra! So ha! Who's the idiot now?!"

Cobra looked patronizing. "You, you stereotyping bastard. And my Pokemon would poison the hell out of all of your pathetic types. Especially Wendy's fairies."

"_How dare you insult my fairies!" _(Cobra felt a strange presence behind him. It felt like a malevolent ghost. He shrugged it off.) "Not only are they beautiful and elegant, but they destroy ALL!"

"Your fairies get pummeled by my Steel-types, too!" (Gajeel could actually see said malevolent ghost. She looked relatively scary and he decided to shut up.) Wendy looked extremely pleased with herself. Of all things, she had to choose Fairy types…..

"Besides," Rogue said, raising an eyebrow, "Obviously dark types are the best, and you three can't say anything against Wendy," he continued, pointing a finger at Gajeel, Laxus, and Natsu, "because you ARE fairies."

Cobra nodded smugly. "Although I disagree with the first part. Poison is the ultimate type. As I've quite rightly stated before."

The three Fairy Tail mages flew across the table to kill Rogue. Wendy cackled evilly. (Aforementioned malevolent ghost presence cackled with her.) Cobra took the opportunity to prove his point by corroding the element symbols off all of Gajeel's cards.

"ELECTRIC IS BEST!"

"YOU'VE GOT NOTHING ON STEEL!"

"FAIRIES ARE PERFECTION!"

"POISON IS KING!"

"DARK IS EMPEROR OF POKEMON!"

"FIRE IS THE RULER!"

They all turned to Sting, who had not expressed an opinion all this time. "WHICH ONE IS THE BEST!? CHOOOOOOOSSSEEEEEE!"

Sting shrugged. "I don't really have a favorite." It became completely silent, and stayed that way for two and a half minutes. Finally, Wendy looked at him, and shook her head.

"Leave. Now."

**Sting, get your act together. **_**Everyone **_**has a favorite type. Mine is personally Psychic. What are your favorites? Tell me when you review(because you are going to review, right? *looks at you meaningfully*)**

**Sayonara!**


	25. Bonus! Oh Sure, Wendy's Innocent

**Sorry for the lack of updates, guys. I've got a lot of projects due for school and I'm going on vacation, so they might be sporadic (and that goes for Flicker and all's fair in love and war too). **

Wendy had them all fooled. Even Charle.

Oh sure, she was a sweet, innocent, shy, apologetic girl. _Suuurrreee._

You see, people seemed to forget what she was, especially with people like Natsu, Laxus, and Cobra on the list. Wendy's a Dragonslayer too, people. When Acnologia shows his ugly face again, she'll be right up there with the rest murdering his stupid lizard self. And therefore, she had super-senses. And was in Fairy Tail.

And they all forgot. Idiots. Oh, she loved them, but they were idiots.

Whenever she walked into the bath house of Fairy Hills or ran up to Mira or Cana or Grey or Erza or any other guild members in the guildhall, often they would rapidly switch the topic of conversation to something more twelve-year-old appropriate. Unfortunately for them, Wendy could hear what they had been talking about from a mile away. (In her personal opinion, Mira was the worst).

And so she knew _everything._

So, the world basically ended when Wendy accidentally referenced something she really wasn't supposed to know about.

Cana had been teasing Natsu and Lucy about their relationship- again- and was laughing about how Natsu was always breaking into Lucy's apartment, and why would he do that unless there was something going on? And Wendy chose that moment to smirkingly say, "He even sleeps in her bed. ALL the time. Now, I wonder, do they end up actually sleeping?"

The room went silent. Natsu and Lucy both simultaneously flushed bright red.

Erza and Charle recovered first, with dark auras surrounding them. "WHO BESMIRCHED WENDY'S INNOCENCE!?"

Grey was first on the list(stripping), followed by Cana(drinking), then Elfman(excessive manliness), Natsu and Lucy(for the supposed not-sleeping), Mirajane(graphic matchmaking), and several other people before Wendy, Laxus, and Gajeel managed to pound it into their heads that it was advanced Dragonslayer hearing.

The whole scene was very violent.

**Wendy knows all, people. Wendy knows all. **

**REQUESTS ARE STILL CLOSED.**

**Review! Sayonara!**


	26. Midnight and Mirajane

**I am such a procrastinator oh my god. Eventually all this work is going to catch up to me and I'm going to die. Also, so sorry for not updating, said procrastination caught up with me.**

**Request made by HowlingWolf16! Definitely delivered a challenge with this one. Thanks to Chartruese for the help!**

Mirajane had decided she had made the right choice, making friends with the best illusion mage on the planet.

Midnight had actually become quite the agreeable person after spending a year around Jellal and Meredy(and not killing people on a daily basis), and was significantly less sadistic/creepy. And, as the rest of Crime Sorciere, had become a shipper. Most notably of Jerza (and Kinabra, but they tried not to think about that around Cobra), but the others were definitely up there. The best part was, she could walk around teasing people all she liked and no magic attacks could hit her. And if anyone tried, she and Midnight would quite happily tie them to a chair and give them horrible nightmares about being locked in a room with Master Bob for forty-eight hours.

So far, they hadn't been bothered. And both were quite convinced that they never would.

Therefore, the next time Crime Sorciere came for a visit, she decided she absolutely had to drag Midnight over to her house and have him create various shipping illusions so she could use them for definitely-not-nefarious-matchmaking-purposes. The good thing was, she knew he'd be perfectly happy to comply. Except if the couple in question involved Jellal.

So while Angel ran off to find Yukino and Cobra and Kinana took turns killing Happy, Midnight followed a very cheerful Mirajane to the Strauss's two-story house.

"What are you going to do with these, anyway?"

"So I won't die the next time Natsu and Lucy don't notice they're in love. And blackmail."

"What if they aren't in love?"

"Shut up. I'll Halphas you."

"I'm terrified. Why is there screaming coming from inside? I'm very curious."

Mirajane also was confused. "Usually it's rather peaceful, unless….." what Midnight called her "coupling grin" spread across her face, as she ran up the steps and pushed the door open. Sure enough, Elfman and Evergreen were in the dining room, their faces three inches from each other, shrieking.

"Oh hee-llooo Evergreen! What would _you _be doing here? I'm surprised, usually people dress up if they're going on a date…."

"As I've told you Mira, a million times before, WE ARE NOT IN LOVE!"

The last part was said in unison. Mirajane just happily smiled and pointed out "Then why is she here every day?"

"The rest of the Thunder Legion comes?"

"And why do they come?"

Both stuttered, suddenly flustered. As if on cue, a blue Exceed appeared behind the two, with his usual catchphrase. "They liiiikkkkeee each other!"

Elfman and Evergreen flipped their heads around frantically, looking for where Happy had both come from and disappeared to. Midnight smirked. Mirajane laughed hysterically.

"I agree with Happy! Or Midnight! Or whatever that was!" came a yell from the other room, aka Lisanna, who was currently engaged in a game of cards with Bixlow. His babies were playing too, and no one was quite sure what they were actually doing. Freed seemed to know, but he was too busy hero-worshipping Laxus to care. Said Lightning Dragonslayer was raiding Mirajane's kitchen, and complaining about how there was no food. Mirajane took a second to throw a bucket of water on his head before she led (read: dragged) Midnight up the stairs to her room, cheerfully singing about how Grey and Juvia would be dating by the end of the week, and Sting was so going to owe her another favor.

Later, while Midnight was in the middle of correcting the number of Sparkles in her StingYu scene, a Fairy Machine Gun: Leprechaun burst up through the floor, bouncing off Reflector. Mirajane turned into Sitri. "Excuse me for a moment."

Not one to miss carnage, Midnight followed her downstairs. She was currently in the middle of half murdering Elfman and Evergreen and half forcibly making them kiss. Laxus was obviously locked in a closet. However, Freed had accidentally been locked in there with him, and several bolts of lightning, shrieks, tears, and other drama were occurring and rapidly growing more annoying. Midnight was contemplating a Dark Capriccio.

He was distracted by the fact that Bixlow and Lisanna were still busy playing cards in the middle of the wrecked living room. The wrecked _on fire_ living room. No, wait. Was Lisanna on fire? Midnight sighed and tapped Mirajane on the shoulder.

"Mira?"

"WHAT!?"

"Your sister is on fire. I don't think she noticed."

"OH MY GOD! LISANNA! YOU'RE ON FIRE!"

The Fairy Mage and Mirajane's other sibling fell to the ground clutching their throats while Mirajane ran over to a freaking-out Lisanna and a panicking Bixlow. It was a testimony to fifteen-something years spent around Angel and Cobra that Midnight hadn't displayed a single emotion yet. God, were they dramatic.

Lisanna was still on fire. Midnight sighed again and blasted Natsu. That kid just didn't know when to stop.

**I'm sure you can guess what happened when Mira noticed Natsu.**

W**e've gotten to 100 reviews! Thanks to all the people who follow/favorite/review this story(and if you really like this one maybe check out my other stories #shameless self promotion)**

**The Sparkles still belong to Dragon'sHost. But I'm going to reference them. EVERYWHERE. **

**REQUESTS ARE STILL CLOSED. (but keep them so you can bombard me once I open them again)**

**Review! Sayonara!**


	27. More Meredy Then Anything Else

**Chapter 426 was incredibly confusing, wasn't it? Honestly, Fairy Tail has been completely turned on its head. The Magic Council is now not morons and includes Fairy Tail's resident Shady Guy(Gajeel), the manga Fairy Tail does not include the guild Fairy Tail anymore, Jellal isn't partially responsible for everything, we don't even know who's evil or not anymore! And in only ten chapters. Someone stop Mashima.**

**Luckily for my new favorite theory, the girl who looked like Mary(from the spinoff **_**Ice Trail**_**) in Avatar's name is Mary. Here's to hoping she is, in fact, Mary. I wrote this in honor of that possibility. Here, I'm just having Mary use daggers, since we don't know her magic.**

**I know, I know, this isn't **_**really **_**a broship, but I owe you a chapter. And I'm too lazy to write a proper one. Sue me. I plead "Grey kills Frosch".**

Meredy didn't know how she got separated from the others. Fairy Tail, Crime Sorciere, and Yukino and the Twin Dragons were somewhere, where, now that was the question. But now she was stuck fighting that annoying pink-haired girl. Who was surprisingly strong. Much stronger than Meredy could handle alone.

Unfortunately, she was alone. And the girl didn't show any sign of letting up, no matter how many times Meredy hit her with her blades. The Sensory Link wasn't working very well, either. They definitely had some sort of connection, but the girl didn't seem to have enough emotions for Meredy to latch on to. From what Meredy could tell, their connection was Grey-related.

Grey. Oh, he was dead. Or whatever was possessing him was dead. Maybe it was this girl. She did stick awfully close to him when Avatar showed up.

The scary thing about that was Juvia wasn't giving a faintest hint of love-rival sensing.

She just looked lost. Meredy was going to _kill _Grey. And then she was sure Ultear and Ur would kill him even more painfully, wherever they were. She hoped that wherever Juvia was in this maze of an underground base, it wasn't facing Grey in battle.

Meredy was thrust out of her thoughts as the pink-haired Avatar mage flung another fleet of daggers at her, lacerating her. Deciding that it was only hindering her, she threw off the remains of her cloak as she readied a Maguilty Ray. The girl artfully dodged most, and the ones that did hit her didn't seem to do much, as with all the others. Meredy was cut all over, and this girl barely had a scratch. It wasn't in Meredy's nature to give up. But this seemed hopeless. Usually, Meredy relied on her ability to create Sensory Links between her and her enemies, and connecting and disconnecting them so all of their attacks hurt them as well as her. That wouldn't work on this girl. The Maguilty Sense mage resolved that if she managed to pull through this, she was mastering the limited Transformation Magic Ultear taught her.

It didn't seem like she was pulling through this, though. The girl had somehow kicked off a wall and tackled Meredy, knocking her the ground and rendering her unable to push herself up. Landing a few feet away, the girl smiled cruelly, taking out her last dagger.

"Oh, you look scared. It's okay! I won't hurt you that bad!" Yeah, that was real convincing while she holding a- oh wait. The girl meant that her death wouldn't be too painful. That was even better. Meredy couldn't help it. After all she'd been through, she was going to die at the hands of someone who looked and acted like her clone, in this underground prison?

"What, crying? You must really be scared." The girl came closer, until she was right by Meredy, who had struggled to her hands and knees, still holding that dagger. "I guess you've never faced someone who could resist your general strategy before. Too bad that mother of yours isn't around to protect you." Her wounds leaking blood, Meredy began to drift in and out of consciousness, and those words struck a long-forgotten memory.

_Mother…...Ultear…_

_(flashback)_

Ultear wrapped the bandage around a thirteen-year-old Meredy's leg. "There, that better?"

Meredy sniffed. "Yeah. I can't believe I got hurt again. You and Jellal are so strong, and you always have to protect me when we fight dark guilds. I can't do anything myself!"

"Well, we are older than you." the Time Arc Mage pointed out.

"Well, yeah," Meredy shrugged. "But still…...I feel like I'm just along for the ride. Like I said, I can't _do _anything."

Ultear took a seat beside her, putting her arm around the teenager's shoulders. "I've got something you might like to know. Your magic can be the strongest of all, once you truly master it."

Meredy looked up at her foster mother with wide eyes. "Really? Even stronger than Arc of Time? Or Death Magic?"

The other woman laughed. "Well, maybe not death magic. You know how your magic connects people's emotions, and right now you have to have a very strong connection with someone to perform a link. As you get better, you'll need less of a connection."

The pink-haired girl nodded. "I know that," she said, "But how does it make my magic so strong?"

Ultear leaned back against the cave they were next to, wincing as one of the rocks dug into her back. "There's one emotion that everyone has, regardless of what they're doing. It's the central emotion that causes all others." She looked up at the sky. "Fear. Fear of you, fear of someone else, fear of their past or future or present, fear is always there, no matter what you're thinking. One day, Meredy, you'll be able to tap into that. And no one will be able to beat you, because not only will you be able to beat them, but your links enable you to understand them. And no one can stand up to that."

She smiled at Meredy. "So work hard, ok?"

"Yeah, definitely! As long as you're here, I'm always going to get stronger!"

She jumped up and tried to run into the cave where they had set up camp, probably to tackle Jellal. Unfortunately for her, Jellal had finally caught on to her, and had set a destruction spell right outside the entrance. Meredy flew back several feet, shrieking, as Jellal gave a self-satisfied smirk, a rare expression for him, and went back to conjuring miniature meteors.

Ultear smiled and said, quietly, "And you'll still get stronger, even when I'm not."

_(end flashback)_

Meredy also smiled to herself. "Now I understand, Ul. And I have gotten stronger."

Summoning all her strength, she managed to reach up and punch her enemy in the face. This gave her enough time to struggle to her feet and bound to the other side of the rocky plateau where they battled.

Once more, she tried a Sensory Link. Reaching deep into the other girl, she found it. A spark that Avatar mage couldn't hide. Fear. And the pink beam flew out of Meredy's wrist, hitting the other girl, who surprise was almost tangible.

"What?! How...it didn't work the first thousand times! How's it working now?!"

Meredy stared at her for a second, and then smiled a bit, almost tenderly. "What are you afraid of?" The girl started, as Meredy felt, through the link, memories. A girl and her sister, beaten by the same kind of jerks who used to try to grab Meredy when she walked around alone during her Grimoire Heart days(they died quickly.) The same girl(who Meredy deduced was the one she was fighting) and her sister on a boat, after being saved by a raven-haired boy(Grey?) and a powerful wizard. Saying goodbye to the boy(who was definitely Grey).

_Will we ever meet again?_

Her sister dying. Her joining a Zeref(Avatar) cult, in hopes that it could find a way to bring her back.

_Yeah! As long as you keep your chin up, I'm sure it will happen!_

The girl let out a long shriek and flew at Meredy. Had she realized that Meredy was seeing her memories? Her cute, holier-than-thou attitude had vanished, replaced by anger and that fear, the fear Meredy was now feeding off of. She fought like a true demon now.

"I'm not afraid of something! I don't have anything to be afraid of!"

"Are you sure?" The girl's eyes glinted red with anger as she tried to kick off the wall again, failing when Meredy established another link and tasered herself. "You know how this works. I can feel it. Your fear. Everyone has it." dashing behind a rock to avoid the next volley of sharp-tipped daggers, she sent her own blue ones shooting out as she continued, "You're scared of losing someone."

"Die already!"

"But I'm going to beat you. You've convinced yourself that if we bring Grey back to the light side, you'll lose him forever. He'll hate you for being what you are."

"_Shut up!_" was the high-pitch, screaming reply.

"I know. I know many who've felt the same. But you need to hear it! I saw your memories! Grey considers you a friend! And he's part of Fairy Tail."

"No! He's a part of Avatar now!"

Meredy ignored her in favor of throwing another Maguilty Sodom. "And Fairy Tail never leaves a friend behind. Ever. So I'm going to beat you, because you're terrified of losing Grey and you can't accept anything besides that." Her enemy's face was contorted in rage as she attempted to block Meredy out, but the Crime Sorciere wizard was unrelenting, "Your fear drags you down! You can't see anything past it! But my fear, my fear that if I do lose Grey to you, that all my other friends will be hurt because of it, makes me stronger! I have to beat you, because you're a threat to my friends!"

And with that, Meredy finally sent the other girl flying into a wall, rocks falling on her

"Fear is the ultimate source of all of our power," she finished, walking over. "You just have to be scared for the right thing."

"What's your name?"

There was a pause, as obviously unwanted tears began to pool in her eyes.

"...Mary. My name's Mary."

"Really. What are you scared of?"

The other girl looked down. "My sister died," she nearly whispered, barely audible. "And...and I thought that Zeref, the ultimate mage, could bring her back. If I did what he wanted. But she hasn't come back, even though I've been here for eleven, twelve years. And Grey came…...I guess…" and now she sounded more like a girl, and less like a demon, "I'm scared that I'm doing the wrong thing. And Grey leaving me, leaving Zeref…...it felt like, if Grey left, I'd be doing the wrong thing." Her voice hitched a little.

Her former enemy smiled. "Well, considering that Zeref did a lot more killing than reviving, whoever's doing the reviving would probably be pretty happy if we snapped Grey out of this mess."

"We?"

"Yeah!" Meredy bent down, and reached out a hand. "So, Mary, want to go be scared of the right thing together?"

Mary looked at her, the anger gone from her eyes. "Amelie would be scared of the right thing. I should too.

Then she'll still be with me, right?"

She took Meredy's hand.

**Wow. That was long. Maybe I can count this as a Mary/Meredy broship! Regular updates should resume by Thursday, as there probably won't be a chapter tomorrow.**

**Requests are still closed. As you can see, I haven't done much for a while, so I still have like seven outstanding. I'm really, really, sorry if you've been waiting! I'll get to them all eventually, I promise!**

**It takes a minute or two of your time to leave a review. So leave one. They make me happy.**


	28. Meredy, Grey, and Lyon

**Sooooo Digi-FanCatt and I were talking about what would happen if Fairy Tail and Lamia Scale teamed up and met Crime Sorciere, and Meredy just TACKLED Grey and Lyon and started shrieking about her uncles. And everyone except the extremely amused CS would be very confused. And this was the hilarious result. **

**I'm sorry this is so, so late. As you can see, it's very long, and adapting it from PM conversation to publishable text was surprisingly difficult, besides having Easter and school. And I was working on my new story, The Logical Thing To Do. Check it out! **

If Lamia Scale was expecting anything when Meredy saw Lyon and Grey, it would not have been this.

"UNCLE LYON I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER YOU TOO UNCLE GREY!" "Arg! Meredy! Get off!" "Stop ripping my shoulder apart!"

Meredy had jumped like a madwoman on top of the two and tackled them to the ground, grinning crazily. Grey had already managed to strip in the struggle.

"Grey, where did your pants go and why are you besmirching Meredy-chan's virtue." came the expected question from Erza, who obviously had fifty-six swords swirling around her head. This, plus the dangerously annoyed aura coming from the man in question caused everyone to back at least twenty feet away.

"Kid! Leave the powerful ice mages alone!" was Cobra's response to the scene, as he grabbed Meredy's arm. She, in response, simply tightened her grip on Grey's.

"WHY AREN'T YOU KILLING LYON TOO, ERZA!? Meredy, quit hanging on my arm!" It wasn't like Lyon was ever fully dressed, either. Erza didn't care, making Grey quite indignant indeed. Which didn't seem to affect how much she cared anyway. And Meredy had not let go of his arm.

"I'm just trying to say hi, Cobra! Why are you interrupting my reu-u-ni-on" Her self-righteous voice didn't seem to be working very well on Cobra, and so she switched to wailing dramatically, catching Angel's immediate attention.

"Cobra, if you keep making Meredy cry, I'm going to kill you. And I'm sure Juvia will help." According to Midnight, Angel was in dismembering-people-with-hight-heels mode. What that mode was and how Midnight knew it existed, no one really wanted to know. That didn't stop him from beginning the story, causing Jellal's exasperated expression (which had disappeared upon seeing Erza) to make a comeback.

"Juvia will help Angel-san kill Cobra, but first she must save Grey-sama from Meredy-san's strangling!" As usual, Juvia's first priority was Grey. Her concern was not unmet, as Meredy's arm had somehow traveled from Grey's arm to his neck in the struggle with Cobra, and now she was hanging on both ice mages.

Natsu chose this chaotic moment to realize that there were several powerful mages available for battle, and as usual, disregard the current situation.

"JELLAL! FIGHT ME!"

And, as usual, it fell to Lucy to rein him in, before he got seriously injured from stabbing, poisoning, or a misaimed high heel.

"Natsu, you idiot, get back here! Do you want Erza to dismember you too?!"

Meanwhile, Lyon's very curious and highly suspicious guild was attempting to question him, Sherry in particular. Though to Lyon, she looked much more amused then suspicious.

"Lyon, you have A LOT of explaining to do." she told him, sternly but still highly amused. Lyon felt a distinct feeling of betrayal.

"Well... Uh... My master, Ul, had a daughter, who decided that Gray and I were her brothers, and the daughter, Ultear, adopted Meredy. Does that- Arg! Get off my head!" Meredy had completed the shift and now had her arms around Lyon's neck and Grey's, causing their heads to very painfully smash together. So much for loving embraces.

"Are you good at being a pony? Can you make ice ponies? Do you have any candy?" Meredy didn't seem to care, to busy interrogating Lyon about his pony-making capacity, as Grey was totally useless in that regard. He couldn't even make good pony statues. It was truly unacceptable.

"Meredy. OFF LYON." Jellal had decided to try and exert authority, already knowing from several years of prior experience that Meredy didn't listen to him.

"But Jelllaaallll...Angel, Jellal's interrupting my reunion!" And there was the proof. Honestly, Angel was just like Ultear. Someone made Meredy unhappy in any way, she was all over them like ugly on a Vulcan.

"HOW DARE YOU!" came the expected scream of rage. Cobra and Midnight sensed the impending danger of Sema and promptly snatched Angel's arms, wincing as her overly long fingernails dug into their wrists.

"Angel. Calm. The hell. Down!"

Meredy, satisfied that she was safe for the moment, turned back to her cap- oh sorry, in the process of being tightly hugged "uncles". Her face brightened, instantly causing both Ice-Make mages to cringe. When Meredy smiled, trouble and despair awakened. This time was no different, for them, at least.

"I know! You and Grey can be Elsa! Hey Wendy, Chelia, wanna help me make Uncles Grey and Lyon be Elsas?"

"Sure!" Wendy and Chelia seemed very interested in this prospect. Grey and Lyon...not so much.

"NOOOOOOO."

Lamia Scale was not done with Lyon, yet.

"That doesn't explain why she's a CONVICT, Lyon!" Lyon was too busy being in a a virtual headlock to answer.

"Angel, I'm going to Sema you!" Jellal had unleashed the most terrifying threat, probably the only thing that actually scared the Oracion Seis, besides Meredy on a sugar high. And lord knows that scared everyone.

Acnologia would probably go hide in a corner. Every Disney song sung off key repeatedly for seventeen hours is not something to be taken lightly.

"Why are all humans such idiots?" Charle asked, with an air of indignancy. Fortunately, Happy had a very wise answer.

"'Cause they all llllllllllliiiiiiike each other!"

Truly, a deep and true thought.

"I'm not a woman, I will not play along with this- no I don't want to be Olaf either!" Why did Meredy have four copies of every outfit from Frozen? And why did she have them hidden in her cleavage? At least there weren't live animals in there.

"ANYTHING BUT SEMA!"

"See, Angel, now look what you've done!" Since Charle had been knocked out in the struggle, it was Midnight and Cobra's turn to be indignant.

Angel felt obligated to defend herself, however, being Angel, such defenses were not very well thought out. "It was your fault for making Meredy cry!" she told them protectively, while Meredy nodded innocently from the background. She then turned back to directing her young apprentices into how to make grown men pretend to be ice princesses for the sake of their amusement.

"Chelia, Wendy, stop! No! NOT THE PUPPY-DOG EYES!"

"Lyon! Why is this girl a convict!"

Lyon managed to wriggle out of Meredy's arms and legs long enough to attempt an answer. Unfortunately, Meredy was now trying to use her magic to link him and Grey with Chelia and Wendy and guilt them into being Elsa, all while lecturing the two sky mages on the correct way to place an Elsa wig on a struggling person's head.

"Well, uh...Grimoire Heart and the Magic-MEREDY I SWEAR IF YOU SENSORY LINK-Council and manipulation and-MEREDY!" And now she was on his head again.

Natsu was still trying to fight Jellal. For completely unrelated reasons, Erza was still trying to kill him. For completely related reasons, Lucy had a vice-grip on both of his arms and she had no intent on letting go. Luckily for her straining shoulders, Natsu was more scared of Erza then any vehicle.

"But Lucy! I wanna fight Je-ERZA ALERT RUNNNNNN!"

"Erza liiiikkkkeesss hi- I TAKE THAT BACK NATSU KILL ME." Happy, in his haste, had caused Erza to turn on him. Realizing he hadn't taken it back fast enough, he began saying his prayers. Lucy decided enough was enough and she wanted her rent money, and screamed, "WE HAVE A JOB TO DO!"

"But, Luce, Erza's gunna kill us all!" Natsu protested.

"_I don't care_! Everyone line up by guild, and calm the hell down!" Lucy was not taking nothing from nobody. Or at least she was trying to.

"Lyon, you still haven't explained. We're going back to Lamia Scale, and it's interrogation time." Sherry decided, with Yuka and Toby nodding their agreement. "Maybe we'll even get Oba to spin you. I'm sure she'll be more then happy to." Lyon did not look pleased with that prospect.

"BUT YOU CAN'T TAKE HIM! WE HAVEN'T DONE FROZEN YET!" Meredy looked like she was about to break into wailing again. And there went Angel.

"Please, can we just stay a little longer?" Chelia asked sweetly. Sherry looked like she was going to give in, even with Yuka whispering, "_Sherry! Stay strong!"_ in her ear. However, Jellal and the rest of Meredy's guild had other ideas, as evidenced by the fact that Jellal had managed to telekinetically force Meredy's limbs from around Lyon, and Cobra had dragged her over to Crime Sorciere by her cape while Hoteye held Angel.

"I think we should leave now." Midnight said, perfectly voicing Lyon and Grey's thoughts.

"NATSU, STOP THROWING POINTLESS FIRE AT MIDNIGHT AND GET OVER HERE." Lucy yelled. As usual, Natsu had forgotten Midnight's magic and was doing his best to burn the Reflector mage, who was barely holding back a smile, off the face of the earth.

"WE HAVE A JOB, PEOPLE! SOME IDIOT IS TRYING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD AGAIN!" Cobra felt obligated to remind his guild of this. Hoteye let go of a suddenly normal-looking Angel.

"Oooohhhhh... Right..."

"But, Frozen?" Meredy asked, her face falling, downcast. "You can play frozen with your uncles after we tack down the big bad guy, okay, Meredy?" Angel told her, smiling.

"You didn't capitalize it." Meredy told her flatly.

"Does that really matter right now?" Cobra asked, raising an eyebrow. Meredy looked murderous.

"YES."

That was when said 'idiot trying to take over the world' chose to make his appearance. "I don't care about all your family reunion, or freezing nonsense. I'm afraid you all have to die." Slowly, Meredy rose from the ground, as Cobra let go of her coat and backed away. Her face shadowed and her fists clenched, she opened her mouth and screamed at the top of her lungs...

..."YOU INSULTED FROZEN AND MY UNCLES! DIE!"

And then Meredy laid waste to all five hundred of them at once while Crime Sorciere cackled and Lamia Scale and Fairy Tail looked on in shock.

"YOU WILL PERISH! HOW DARE YOU INFURIATE ME! MAGUILTY SODOM! FIFTEEN-WAY SENSORY LINK! DIIIIIEEEEEEEE!"

"..."

"And she's not even the strongest member..." murmured Chelia. "Let's all thank whatever god is up there that Crime Sorciere isn't in the Grand Magic Games."  
"Indeed. We'd get crushed." agreed Lucy, while everyone else nodded.

"Fairy Tail wouldn't!" Natsu yelled, looking horrified that members of his guild would say such things. Charle sighed.

"Because none of Crime Sorciere dares make Erza upset, Natsu."

That was when Meredy not-subtly whispered to Angel"Because then Jellal would kill whoever it was, right? Right?" Angel nodded, grinning conspiratorially, along the rest of Crime Sorciere.

There was a pause. Then Happy decided it was his time to shine.

"They LIIIIKKKEEE each other!" A meteor and seventy swords and a mace surrounded him."NOOOOO I DIDN'T MEAN THAT NATSU HELP!"

"I'm not getting in their way!" Natsu yelped, barely dodging a slightly misaimed sword.

"You're idiotic enough to." Grey informed him, rather smugly. The Fire Dragonslayer turned on his rival, furious. "What was that, Ice Princess!?" Meredy's eyes widened from atop her pile of utterly defeated bad guys.

"ICE PRINCESS! IT'S FROZEN TIME!"

"Goddamit, Natsu." the entire congregation deadpanned.

"Uncles! Let's play Frozen now!"

"Oi, Elsa, I thought you were going to fight me!" Natsu told the once-again entangled ice mage. Grey responded rather calmly, considering the situation he was in. Or maybe it was just total defeat and acceptance. One of the two. "Later. My niece is demanding attention, and nobody knows how to deny her."

"I can." Cobra pointed out. It was true, which everyone hated him for.

"You can hear thoughts, and therefore can hold shipping material over her, Cobra. Speaking of which..." "Forget it, you stupid cat. Or has that demon woman been paying you again?" Happy tried not to look suspicious. Of course, looks never fooled Cobra, who resolved to pay said demon woman a visit very, very soon. And possibly bring some tea. Laced with cyanide. Or the like.

Lamia Scale had reversed back into a highly confused state. "Sooo...does anyone else have any idea what's going on?"

They were ignored.

"Fine! I'll fight Jellal instead! Or Erza!" Natsu decided, since Grey was too busy being an ice princess to do anything.

"I THOUGHT WE ESTABLISHED THAT THAT WAS A BAD IDEA, NATSU." Lucy managed to say through gritted teeth. Honestly, how could he be so smart and at the same time such an absolute moron?

"But Lucccyyyyyy-" her partner whined. Lucy wasn't giving him any ground on this one. If only for his own health. (Though getting a thorough beat-down by one of the two would probably do him good.) "NO."

"Grey, Lyon sucks at making ice gowns. You make them. Chelia, got the blonde wigs?" Grey and Lyon's eyes widened and they looked at each other, suddenly panicking. Meredy was getting really, really serious about this. **Really, really serious.**

"Yep! I've got one and Wendy's got the other!" And Chelia and Wendy were supposed to be on their side, dammit!

"Meredy, you aren't seriously going to go that-" and then the two spotted a glaring Angel from behind extremely happy Meredy. "OK WHATEVER YOU WANT."

"Somebody fight me!" Natsu complained. Everyone was ignoring him! Why couldn't he just punch someone? Unfortunately, he liked punching ice mages, and both ice mages were, well...

Currently Lyon: "I'm a pretty snow princess, and I'm enjoying it. Really!"

Currently Grey: "Aye sir! Nothing better than freezing things and loving family!"

...occupied.

"I wish we could record this." Cana, who had somehow arrived on the scene, said to no one in particular.

"On it, alrea-" Cobra was suddenly and mysteriously a block of ice.

"How did they find time to freeze Cobra?" Erza wondered.

"I dunno."

"NO! I WANTED TO FIGHT COBRA!" Natsu exclaimed angrily.

"Shut up!" Laxus, who was somehow also there, told him. "Laxus! You can fight me!" Natsu shouted excitedly! "Fire Dragon's Iron- AAAAHHHHHHHH!" And there was the expected Lightning Dragon's Halberd.

Lucy and Happy sighed. Grey laughed. Too bad Meredy was still examining his Elsa costume.

"Grey! You ruined it! Now I'm gonna be sa-ad!" Meredy wailed dramatically. "You're lucky Angel feels she owes you since you saved her life." she added, much more menacingly. Chelia and Wendy looked at each other, concerned for Grey's safety. Luckily, they had a save.

"It's ok, Meredy! Here, this gives us an opportunity to add lipstick!" Lyon looked thoroughly outraged. For a good reason.

"Grey. I am going to kill you." he said, with no flair whatsoever.

"I think we'll be killing ourselves fir-oh lord it's Ultear's ghost let's all shut up and do what Meredy wants." Indeed, although not everyone seemed to be able to see it, a transparentish black haired woman in a leotard and tights was sitting on a tree branch, grinning at them. While she might be dead, there was no guarantee she couldn't stiil cause serious emotional damage. Or maybe even physical. It was _Ultear_, after all.

"Ultear? Ultear!" Meredy shrieked, beginning to run around in circles with her face a mixture of disbelief and shock.  
"I think she's forgotten us as she's running in circles looking for the ghost." Grey whispered. "Think we can escape?" Lyon whispered back. "I don't dare." Grey answered, furtively glancing around. "Good point."

"Good news!" Meredy told them, coming back excitedly. "Ghost!Ultear's here on invitation of Mavis! And she says Ur's watching too, so you two better be good Elsas!"  
"ULTEAR WHYYYYYYYY" Grey moaned. Lyon also moaned, but wondered, who the heck is Mavis?

"K guys, I got the cam-" Cana also became an ice block, right there next to the rapidly thawing Cobra, who was quickly refrozen.

"Well. They froze Cana too." Erza said, observantly. "That's fast. Jeez." Lucy agreed, before jumping as Loke appeared out of nowhere.

"So what's going WAIT GREY IS THAT AN ELSA COSTUME?!" Loke looked like his birthday had come early. Grey glared at him menacingly, or as menacingly as he could in an Elsa dress, wig, and bright red lipstick.  
"Loke. GO AWAY."

"Not when there are beautiful ladies to be found!" the celestial spirit declared. Turning to a very confused Meredy, he dropped down to one knee with a magically-appearing rose in his hand. "I don't believe we've been aquainted, Miss Meredy! May I tell you how beaut- _oh shit_." Crime Sorciere did not take kindly to people hitting on Meredy. Especially because Meredy had no idea how to react to flirting, and therefore had begun to howl. Loudly.

"...Yikes." Lucy decided, watching as Angel demonstrated the full extent of her dismembering-with-high-heel mode. And Erza helped.

"I think everyone is now firmly in the be-scared-of-Crime-Sorciere camp." Levy, who was now also here for some reason, said, turning to her blonde friend.

"Affirmative, Levy. Affirmative."

"We could've taken him. She's our niece." Lyon said, though he doubted he and Grey could have done a better job then the independent guild, cheered on by the ghost.

"... Sorry. I guess she's almost like a second Millianna in my eyes." Jellal and Erza said thoughtfully, and at the same time. Happy valiantly resisted. And believe me, it took a LOT of willpower to avoid his usual outburst. Then again, the threat of imminent death probably helped his resolve.

"Okay... What does that mean in normal people terms?" Sherry asked. "Better question- are there even any normal people here?" Yuka added.

"Uncles! You need to sing Let It Go!"

"Apparently not."

"Oh no..." Lyon and Grey moaned, pleadingly. The Maguilty Sense mage was having none of that, as she trilled, "Now! Now! NOW!"

"The snow glows white on the mountain tonight?" the two began, tentatively. The pink-haired mage tutted.

"Tut tut tut. Wendy, grab the projector and pull up the words, won't you? And Chelia, get the music video so they know when to do the ice castle." "Right, boss!" both shouted, saluting. Mirajane chose now to arrive on the scene, bringing with her all the ships.

"Oo! Oo! I'll get Juvia and she can be Kristoff! And Grey and Lyon can fight over her!" Mirajane volunteered. Meredy began waving her hands around and squealing in delight. So did Wendy(though Chelia looked less then pleased.) "THAT'S A GREAT IDEA MIRAJANE I LOVE YOU LET'S DO IT OH JUUUVVVIIIAAA!"

"Juvia-chan will surely choose me!" Lyon declared passionately, rose petals and Sparkles appearing out of nowhere around him.

"I'm not going to fight over Juvia!" Grey told Meredy heatedly. (The Sparkles swirling around him betrayed his true feelings. Apparently the Sparkles were involved in a ship war. The winner was unclear. For now.)

"But you looooovvveee her!" Happy trilled, floating upside down and grinning. Grey managed to look menacing while still in his Elsa costume. Happy decided to stop talking right then.  
"Finally, male cat gets a clue." Charle muttered, shaking her head.

"Uh, isn't it Anna that falls for Kristoff?" Lucy pointed out, curiously. Mirajane paused. And then pointed at Meredy and whispered malevolently "BE. QUIET!"

"Yes Mira." Lucy stated very, very, quickly. Juvia seemed to agree with her earlier statement, however.

"Juvia is quite sure Love Rival is correct. Grey-Sama should be Anna."

"But, he's Elsa!" Meredy said with wide eyes. Juvia weighed Frozen canon against Meredy's happiness. With glare from Angel and Mirajane, she chose the latter.

"Juvia will not say no to Meredy-chan."

"Good choice! Now, I believe we were starting the ice castle scene? You two, get to it! Juvia, you'll come in later, so just sit tight."

"She's really got this planned, doesn't she?" murmured Lucy to Juvia, who nodded vigorously. Cobra heard her, and snickered.

"Are you kidding? Meredy's been planning this since last month." As soon as that came out of his mouth, Grey and Lyon's tiredly accepting expressions changed to ones of pure and unadulterated outrage.  
"You knew she," Grey managed to say through his fury,

"was going to do this," Lyon added with equal anger,

"AND YOU DIDN'T WARN US?!" they screamed together. Wendy and Chelia covered their ears. Meredy, however, was too involved in syncing the music to the projector to notice. Angel shook her head, looking apologetic.  
"Darlings, we didn't want to disrupt Meredy's planning either. Not only does she have Sensory Links, but..."

"Ultear's ghost is a constant presence. It's terrifying." Cobra finished, as all of Crime Sorciere except Meredy involuntarily shuddered.

"Ah." said all four in understanding.

Unfortunately for Grey and Lyon, that was not going to save them from Meredy's plans. She had finished setting up her electronics, and clicked the play button just as Cobra finished.

"Now, start singing!" she announced.

"Aye Sir!" Grey and Lyon said, snapping to attention and beginning to sing. "Let it go, let it go, etc. et-cet-era!"

They were _awful_.

It was like Gajeel and Orga sitting down to do a duet, but better. That did not mean it was good. The fact that they could be compared was very, very scary. Meredy frantically waved her hands in the air, signaling for them to stop before someone went deaf. "Ah! Sing it right! Sing it right!"

"I am!" the two protested in unison.

"NO YOU'RE NOT!" shrieked everyone present. Grey and Lyon winced from the level of horror on everyone's faces. Well, except Gajeel. He seemed to think they were brilliant.

"Gray-sama and Lyon are tone deaf?" Juvia asked, sounding amazed that her Grey-sama could be bad at anything except realizing his apparent unconditional love for her.

"Both of them?" Lucy asked, also a but surprised. For some reason, she had always assumed Grey was a good singer. She wasn't sure why. Natsu certainly wasn't, and Erza got stage fright and punched people. Maybe it was a slayer thing. Though she had never heard Wendy and Chelia sing...

"Ultear too, actually. Karaoke night with her was rather... What's the word? - Interesting! That's it. I'm willing to bet Ur was as well." Jellal said reminiscently. Ultear glared at him from behind Meredy and her projector. Luckily for him, she was too busy staring threateningly at Grey and Lyon to attempt anything.

"Wow, really, Jellal? I wonder how all of them managed that." Erza wondered. Jellal shrugged. "... Science?" Then Meredy's faced brightened and she opened her mouth, and all of Crime Sorciere instinctively shivered.

"I HAVE AN EVEN BETTER IDEA THEN FROZEN! WE SHOULD ALL GET TOGETHER AND HAVE OPEN MIC NIGHT!"

"Oo! I'll sing!" Mirajane exclaimed excitedly. "I'll sing too!" Gajeel volunteered.

"Mirajane's fine. Gajeel is not allowed near the microphone." decreed Erza with great finality.

"WHAT!?" Gajeel yelled furiously. He wanted to sing! This was completely unfair!

"Master's orders." Erza told him, crossing her arms. It was obvious she was intent on enforcing Master's orders to whatever extent she was able to. Which was a long, long extent.  
"We're going to have a converstion about this!" Gajeel huffed, not daring to go against Erza. Juvia raised her hand. "Juvia could recite a poem."

"Please don't let Juvia near the microphone either. Especially if she's mentioned my name." Grey pleaded to Erza. She simply smirked at him. "Sorry, it's OPEN mic night."

"YOU BANNED GAJEEL!" Grey shouted furiously. He was distinctly ignored.

"Since they have proven themselves tone deaf, Lyon and Gray aren't allowed to sing." Lucy added, giving the two forceful glares.

"C'mon Lucy, don't glare at us like that!"

"I will glare at whomever I want." the blonde told them firmly.

"She liiikkkeess them!" Happy snickered. Lucy turned her death glare on him, but Natsu angrily beat her to it. "Lucy doesn't like the stripper! Or the other stripper!"

Happy saw material in that one.

"He liiikkkkeesss her!" he giggled through his hands. "SHUT. UP. HAPPY." Lucy nearly screamed, slamming her hand on Ultear's tree with each word.

"She liiikkkkeees him!" Happy exclaimed delightedly.

Lucy, Natsu, Grey, and Lyon looked at each other.

"MAKE UP YOUR MIND YOU DAMN CAT!"

**This is probably the most random thing I've published since the Ichiya chapter. Hope you enjoyed it, and if you did, leave a review! And thank you to all the people who have been following, favoriting, and reviewing this story and me! I love all of you!**

**Request if you like, but don't expect me to get to it soon. I always get to everything eventually, though, so don't worry, especially if you've been waiting months now for me to do your request. I'm trying, I promise!**


	29. Laxus and Wendy

**The chapter is out! And it's not that late! Missions are surprisingly difficult to think up.**

**The Sparkles, as always, belong to Dragon'sHost.**

"Mirajane, I can't find anyone to go on a job with me!"

Wendy was in despair. She desperately needed to go on a job, as her Fairy Hills rent was due. But she really didn't want to go alone. Erza had gone on an S-Class job three days ago and taken the rest of Wendy's team with her, but Wendy had been sick and couldn't go with them. Ironically, Wendy had recovered but it seemed that something was going around, as not only was Charle sick, but Juvia, Gajeel, Team Shadowgear, Lisanna, Evergreen, Cana, Bisca, Asuka, and even Master Makarov were all incapacitated. Therefore, anyone Wendy would usually take a request with wasn't able to function.

"Well, I'm sure I can find someone! Hmmm…." Mirajane looked around, still polishing a glass. "Ah! How about Laxus?"

The other girl looked over. Her fellow Dragonslayer was sitting at the other side of the bar, looking irritated and glaring at Mirajane, probably because he had asked her for a drink about twenty minutes ago, and she had agreed to bring him one and promptly got caught up in her shipping fantasies.

Wendy winced a little. "But Laxus-san is….a bit scary."

"Don't be that way!" Mirajane told her brightly, already heading to where Laxus sat. "He's really a lovely person, if you really get to know him. Right, Laxus?"

"Yeah, like you're a lovely person _until_ people get to know you." When Mirajane looked affronted, Laxus just snickered and looked at Wendy. "And I'll go on a job with you, kid, if you want."

Wendy was still a bit scared, but with an encouraging look from Mirajane she slowly nodded. "Well….okay. But I don't know which job to pick." Wendy was quite worried that she'd pick one that was too easy and Laxus wouldn't want to go with her anymore. Luckily for her, he was already heading to the request board.

Wait. The S-Class request board? Seeing her confused look, Laxus shrugged. "Your Fairy Hills rent is pretty expensive, right? One of these will keep you set for years. And this one's got a silver key reward, too, so you can give that to the cosplayer."

"But...aren't these….dangerous?"

"I take these by myself all the time, and this is one of the less dangerous ones. Besides, you're not too bad, kid. In most other guilds you'd almost be S-Class level." Wendy's eyes nearly popped out of her head as she took a closer look at the request. 2.8 million jewels and two silver keys for one of the less dangerous ones?! What the heck did the really dangerous ones pay?

Considering Erza took these all the time, too, no wonder she could afford 500,000 jewels a month. Wendy looked at Mirajane, who just waved. "Don't worry, Wendy! If you're with Laxus, there's no chance of getting hurt! Especially because _he won't let you_." Mirajane's eyes glowed with the light of Satan Soul. "I'll tell Charle where you've gone! Have fun!" And then she was instantly incredibly cheerful again. Laxus, used to dealing with Mira, just rolled his eyes and walked out the door, Wendy trotting behind him.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_ON A TRAIN_

"So what job are we doing anyway, Laxus-san?"

"Well, see," Laxus paused for a second, looking sick, and Wendy internally giggled. Being Wendy, however, she immediately cast Troia, and Laxus looked surprised and then gave her a grateful look(an expression rarely seen on Laxus.) "There's a gang of bandits we've gotta track down and turn into the Council."

"So why's it an S-Class job?" That sounded pretty routine, like something she'd do with her normal team or even by herself.

"The bandits not only have several wyverns under their command, they're trying to steal pieces of the Eclipse Gate to "revive the Dark Lord" or some Zeref related shit like that. That's also why we're going to Crocus."

Oh. Wyverns. Wendy shrank a little in her seat, and Laxus noticed. He wasn't the best at reassuring scared kids, seeing in that he had limited experience in that department. Maybe hanging around Asuka more would be a good idea…..

"Hey, don't worry, kid. Wyverns are a lot like dragons, remember? Natsu used to hunt them down to practice Dragonslaying magic on them, it's super effective(though not to the same extent.) And what are we both?"

"Dragonslayers!" Wendy said excitedly, perking up significantly. Laxus quietly congratulated himself for this. "And as for the bandits, the clients for these jobs often panic and overestimate the enemy, even the kingdom themselves. They probably won't be harder to take then your regular Dark Guild. Heck, they probably are a Dark Guild and our clients just don't know that."

"Does that happen a lot?" Laxus shrugged. "Sometimes. Even the Magic Council can't keep tabs on all the dark guilds popping up. And when they do manage to keep tabs on them, soon or later they self-destruct or a gang of vigilantes/our friends Crime Sorciere take them out."

Wendy snickered. "I take it the Magic Council does all the arresting and none of the fighting?"

"Kid knows something, that's for sure!" Laxus snickered right along with her. Then again, Fairy Tail's always had a thing against the Council. What did we expect?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_AT THE PALACE IN CROCUS, FIORE_

"We cannot allow these parts to fall into these vagabond's hands!" King Fiore announced, standing up on his throne so that Laxus wouldn't tower over him. "We have no idea what havoc they could wreak with such artifacts, and we'd rather not find out! Therefore, we ask you to hunt these men and their beasts down and bring them to prison, where they rightfully belong."

Laxus nodded. "I need all the information you can give us about our opponents. We know about the wyverns. Approximately how big is their force?"

The king wrung his hands, looking flustered. "That's the thing!" he cried. "We have no idea! Somehow, they're concealing themselves and their wyverns, and our forces have been unable to track them down. They've been breaking in left and right, they even got into Hell Palace! Luckily, the Garou Knights were able to successfully execute them. Unfortunately, a mysteriously appearing wyvern took them out, and they would have been executed themselves had our rescue team not been fast enough." The rest of the people in the room murmured nervously, apparently the version they'd heard hadn't been so close.

"Alright. Do you have any leads on where they might be?" One of the soldiers stepped forward. "Considering the frequency of the attacks, we've determined that they have to be stationed either somewhere in the town or, more likely, in the surrounding forest. You're probably going to have to do a bit of searching, unfortunately."

"Can't be helped." sighed the older mage. "Ready to do some searching, Wendy?"

"Ah, yes, I forgot. Cosmo asked if she could talk to you, Wendy. Apparently she has a gift for you- something about plums?"

Wendy grabbed Laxus's hand and very quickly and attempting to be politely dragged him out of the palace, muttering under her breath, "Not the plums. Not the plums. NOT THE PLUMS!"

The last part may have been louder than intended.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_IN A GODFORSAKEN FOREST_

"Damn, kid, we should of brought that cat of yours," Laxus grumbled, sending another bolt of lighting into a tree in an apparent effort to lure out something to fight. Nothing answered the metaphorical call. "It's been three days and we've been marching around in these woods, with absolutely nothing found."

"The King wasn't kidding when he said they were hard to find. Even neither of our advanced senses can pick up something. Then again, it probably would have helped if I knew what a wyvern smelled like…." Wendy murmured in response.

The woods, for all of Laxus's complaints, were actually quite the lovely place. Light filtered in from the quietly hanging branches, as a slight breeze rustled the tree leaves and gently blew Wendy's hair around. There were little animals everywhere too, foxes and rabbits and other creatures that only lived around Crocus, because of the flowers. Wendy would have been happy to come here, even without the mission, just to see this serene place.

However, she doubted Laxus would, as she once again was forced to gently chide him, "Laxus-san, don't take your anger out on the trees. It isn't their fault Dark Guilds are hard to find."

Her partner sighed and glared at the offending tree. "Fine. You know, I have to wonder whether they're in these woods at all. The kingdom would have spotted wyverns flying through the air, wouldn't they? And it would take mighty concealment or illusion magic to hide those wyverns, especially considering they're like dragons and so magic doesn't work on them very well."

Wendy caught on to his train of thought. "So they couldn't be stationed in the woods and get those wyverns all over the place. Plus, a wyvern 'mysteriously' appeared in Hell Palace, which is underground. They searched the whole kingdom while that was going on, there's no place that the wyvern could have entered the ground and then come back up to hide again."

Laxus was vigorously in agreement. "So when all that factors in, the only place they could be is…"

"Under Crocus itself!" the two said together, making Wendy giggle and Laxus smile. Just a little bit.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_BACK IN CROCUS_

"Wait. Why do you need a bulldozer. You are part of _Fairy Tail_. We would be insane to give _the most destructive guild on the planet a __**bulldozer**_."

"They aren't going to give in, are they?"

"Nope. We're just going to have to blast our way- Wendy, what are you doing?"

Wendy had turned around from their audience and seemed to be conjuring up a sniffle. Suddenly, hearts, rose petals, and hundreds of Sparkles swirled around her as she turned, lifting her face up to the light, and with the most amazing, adorable, Sparkliest, puppy dog eyes ever and the sweetest voice of an angel…..

"Can we have a bulldozer?"

Five minutes later, Laxus found himself and Wendy at the helm of a construction crew. She patted the Sparkles on the head and fed them something that looked suspiciously like cyanide. "Good babies!"

The Lightning Dragonslayer decided that he really needed to help Wendy not spend so much time around Mirajane. And to not get on Wendy's bad side. He wasn't sure what those Sparkles were capable of, but they were the ones always around Blue Pegasus and Blue Pegasus was _creepy_.

Wendy, after saying goodbye to her "friends", was now helping Laxus listen for hollow spots, or dragon roars, or evil laughter, or anything that might point them to their enemies location. It was difficult, but luckily it was a weekday and so the streets of Crocus were mostly clear to let the construction brigade through. Then…

"There! Dig there!" Laxus's partner didn't get the chance to say anything else, as the Dark Guild apparently decided they should make their move first, if anything. At least ten wyverns burst from the ground, followed by tens of members of the Dark Guild.

"Run them over with the bulldozers!" Laxus shouted as he grabbed Wendy and jumped up onto a building. "We'll take care of the wyverns!" His parkour training served him well, as the two climbed higher and higher until they were up enough to stage an ambush on said wyverns. "Wait a second," Wendy said, holding out her hand to pause. "That's a lot of wyverns, so I'll enhance us first." Laxus watched, curious, as the blue-haired girl held out her hands. A sky-blue magic circle appeared over her outstretched palm.

"Arms X Vernier!"

Laxus raised an eyebrow as an aura appeared around the two of them. Instantly, he felt lighter, stronger, and full of power. "Not bad, kid. I was definitely right about your power."

Wendy blushed and grinned a little, happy for the praise from another, extremely powerful Dragonslayer. "Now, what do you say we take these guys down a notch, do you?"

"I say yeah!"

The two jumped off the building and into battle together. Almost immediately, they were faced with the laser-breath(not unlike Sting's) of the wyverns. Wyverns were scary creatures, big with a mouthful of pointy teeth, scales harder than diamond, and spiked tails and wings. They also had a resistance to magic, making them a difficult target to capture. Almost any job where you might be faced with more than two wyverns at a time was generally S-Class. Of course, this didn't account for Dragonslayers and Fairy Tail.

"Sky Dragon's Claw!" "Lightning Dragon's Breakdown Fist!"

The two soon discovered two things- non-physical attacks were much more effective, and if you knocked a mage off their wyvern the wyvern went crazy and ran for the hills. They used these realizations much to their enemies' terrified chagrin.

"Sky Dragon's Wing Attack!" One of the wyverns swung its tail hard and fast, right where Wendy had just finished casting her attack. It hit her full-force, sending her flying into a building and crashing the wall, as the remaining curious citizens evacuated, screaming.

"Wendy! Lightning Dragon's Roar!" Laxus quickly took revenge, slamming a column of lightning right into the wyvern's underbelly, testament to his aim. The wyvern roared in anger, thrashing and destroying several more buildings and ripping apart the ground. The mage controlling it nearly fell off, clinging desperately to the green monster's wing. He didn't hang for long, though- a well-placed spear sent him right into the hands of the soldiers taking out the ground mages below. "How many is that?"

"We've taken down six!"

Laxus didn't get a chance to respond, as the Dark Guild members had decided he was a bigger threat than the Sky Dragonslayer. Three of the remaining wyverns surrounded him, the mages on them grinning. All of them said a quick incantation, and the three wyverns shot out a white beam of burning fire, only two of which Laxus managed to dodge. The third hit him at point-blank range, only doing minor damage, but it knocked him off his feet and a good yard back. Unfortunately, this gave the other two wyverns an opening to smash their tails into his chest. Laxus, understandably, was not happy.

"Lightning Dragon's Halberd!" One of the offending wyverns went flying, decimating another good two blocks. The other was taken out by Wendy's wyvern, who had seriously underestimated his opponent. And when we say taken out, we mean taken out. She literally sent the other dragon-like creature and its rider shooting into their comrade, causing them to slam their tails into each other and breaking their wings, effectively rendering them useless. The last one got a clue and tried to turn tail and run. It was too late for that, as Laxus and Wendy both cast a breath spell in his direction.

_BAM! CRASH BANG BOOM! _

And there went that Dark Guild. The two Dragonslayers were pretty sure they crashed the wyverns into the remains of their offensive. Jumping down confirmed this.

Laxus still winced. "Gramps is not going to be happy….."

Buildings destroyed, roads torn up, and possibly-dead-or-not bodies floating in the river….

"Well, at least the kingdom was involved too, so they can't pin it all on us."

"Knowing the kingdom, get the puppy-dog eyes ready."

Luckily, the infamous puppy-dog eyes were unnecessary, as Princess Hisui, still feeling indebted to Fairy Tail for the Eclipse incident, intervened on their behalf. The king eventually gave them the full reward with one silver key taken off. Wendy didn't mind, Christmas was coming up and she was sure Lucy would appreciate the silver key of the Great Bear, Ursa Major.

However, she was still amazed at the sheer amount of money they had received. Laxus had given her a much larger part than half, and insisted she take it, saying that "you need all the money you can get, considering you're on the team with the two most destructive forces in Fairy Tail."

"Natsu and Grey?"

"Natsu and _Erza_."

Wendy started to protest, and then thought back to the many millions of swords, axes, maces, arrows, and assorted weapons that mysteriously ended up anywhere Erza took a job. Natsu didn't even need to be debated.

"Actually, that makes a lot of sense. I still don't think…."

"Take it, kid." Laxus told her, rolling his eyes in exasperation. "I can go on another S-Class mission anytime. Besides, Erza's going to try and murder me when you get back and probably Mirajane will too, and that'll help my case."

"I didn't get hurt that bad!"

Laxus shook his head. "Any scratch is a gaping wound when it comes to you. And that cat'll claw my eyes out, anyway."

"Don't worry. I'll use my puppy-dog eyes! You know, maybe you were right about that I should use them more often. I don't have that much extra money left for sweets, usually….bet Lucy would buy them for me if I looked at her right…."

As Wendy drifted off into daydreamland, Laxus looked out the window of the train and inwardly smiled. If Bunny-Girl didn't buy Wendy those treats, Laxus might just have to buy them for her. Bixlow's babies were an excellent transport for "mysterious deliveries", after all….

Then again, if he admitted he actually cared for the youngest Dragonslayer, Evergreen and Bixlow would never let him hear the end of it.

**I hope my battle scene was somewhat decent(don't have a lot of practice, lol)! I love Laxus and Wendy as a broship, and I've had some eager askers for it, so I hope I did it justice. **

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW**

**(this PSA was brought to you by thefourteenthdarkone, who is also engaging in shameless self-promoting and insisting you go look at her other stories if you like this one)**

**Also, author's notes are kind of boring to write, except thinking up new ways to ask for reviews, so if you have a question about Fairy Tail, ships, episodes, or otherwise you want to ask me, go ahead in your review!(which you will be leaving, right?)**


	30. Laki and Kinana

**One of my favorite ****head canons, as I love Laki/Kinana friendship and I love Kinabra. Obviously, I HAD to write it sometime.**

**Because of the past I invented for her, Laki's thoughts will sound relatively normal, but her pattern of speech will be like it usually is. She also tends to drop it around Kinana, since they're such good friends(and I'm lazy and my mom's yelling for me to go to bed. Sue me.)**

Laki had always found her best friend a bit mysterious.

How could she not? The girl had shown up in the infirmary out of nowhere one day, with no memory and eyes full of daydreams and stars. She had never ended up remembering anything, except for often, in the beginning, looking around like she heard someone calling her name. She couldn't use magic, but always stayed at the guild, never even attempting to get permission to leave or look for her parents or old friends. An twelve-year-old(or at least that's how old she seemed to be), with no background and no family.

This mystery only intensified after it had been about five years since the Tenrou group had disappeared. Fairy Tail was in disarray and disgrace, with only about thirteen remaining members. Most had left, and the rest of their more loyal members had been killed on jobs, jobs they knew were too difficult for them and took anyway to try and help the guild. Twilight Ogre ran the town, and Laki was the only female wizard left in Fairy Tail. Kinana, being the only other girl, and she became natural friends. And it was then when Kinana confided in her best friend that not only had she been a snake minutes before Makarov brought her to the guild, but she had this constant voice, calling to her. One that she swore up and down she knew, and the purple-haired girl was convinced she'd find the source one day.

Laki, privately, had sworn to herself she'd do anything to help her friend find the voice's owner, no matter who it was.

It was then she thought it couldn't get any stranger, but of course, it did. After the Infinity Clock incident, Laki found Kinana walking around on her own a lot. She had developed a strange obsession with snakes a while ago(understandable, considering she had been one), but now it was like she could talk to them. Magic. But as far as Laki knew, Kinana didn't have a drop of magic in her body. The other thing, was Kinana had stopped mentioning the voice.

Even after the Grand Magic Games, Laki was still determined to help Kinana find her apparent friend. But the girl had no interest anymore. It made Laki suspicious. Had she found it and not told her? But why would she do that?

A very, very, mysterious girl, indeed. When she confessed to Max how strange she found her friend one day, Max laughed and told her, "Well, everyone says you're mighty strange too, so I guess you go together, eh?" Laki had laughed at that too. She did speak awfully strange sometimes. Her parents had both been writers, and they said that "Speaking creatively helps the creativity flow into you." She had developed that way of talking out of habit, and she probably could have broken it by now.

But after her parents were cut down by those child-hunters she escaped by a hair, Laki had felt a sort of duty to continue speaking like that, in their memory, and had learned Wood-Make Magic mostly for its allowance for creativity. And she was pretty good at it, too. Of course, if you were looking to become famous in the Maker Magic business, it probably would help not to be in the same guild as Grey Fullbuster.

_It's not like we're still in the same guild now anyway, anymore..._

After Tartaros and the subsequent unexplained disbandment, Mirajane, who was excellent friends with Kinana though the fact that they were both barmaids, invited her to come along with her, her siblings, and Kinana on their little adventure. This adventure had ended about three months after Fairy Tail vanished, when they had come across Blue Pegasus and Jenny had told them they should hang out here for a while. And everyone agreed, mostly because they wanted to see Elfman stuck with a bunch of pretty boys. The other may or may not have been seeing Mirajane when the Trimens started to get on her nerves.

Halphas was truly terrifying, indeed.

Kinana had gotten a job at their guild hall at the bar, and after two or three weeks the five had just rented a house together. Laki had never hung out with Mirajane, Lisanna, or Elfman before, but she was really starting to enjoy their company.

Master Bob and the rest of Blue Pegasus, having known Fairy Tail for so long, recognized that they couldn't bring themselves to join another guild, and were fine if they took a jb from the request board as long as they told the client Blue Pegasus sent them, and paid their own repair expenses. _They probably heard the Demon Mirajane Going Overboard horror stories__..._ Laki had thought wistfully. Makarov and his complaining about the damage expenses his brats had incurred...Laki missed those lectures, and she knew the others, here and wherever they are, did too.

At least she had Mirajane and Lisanna and Elfman and Kinana and all the rest of Blue Pegasus. She and Eve had actually become good friends, as Laki was always interested in torture practices from various places, and Eve was all too happy to provide examples from the Council. As he put it, in the middle of a conversation about dropping lemon juice in people's eyes, "It's nice to be able to drop the flirty little-brother persona for a little while." Laki had congratulated him on not adding "Of course, around someone as amazing as you, how could I not show you the real me?" or the like. This had made a nearby Lisanna laugh so hard she nearly died of asphyxiation at the Wood-Make mage's sparkly impression.

But it felt like she had less of Kinana nowadays. The girl would disappear, much like she used to before Fairy Tail was gone. But before, she would always tell at least Laki where she going. Now she wouldn't, and avoided any and all questions on the subject. Needless to say, Laki was very suspicious, and so was Mira when she told her about these vanishing acts.

So naturally, Mira decided that Laki should stalk her.

Kinana was being very evasive, slipping around corners and intentionally going through crowds, taking the longer routes and the ones that Blue Pegasus mages would be unlikely to travel on. _It's obvious she doesn't want to be followed, but where is she... I lost her! Mira's going to be furious! _

Laki did not want to be on the receiving end of the white-haired matchmaker's fury. _Now, if I were a Kinana, where would I hide? Hmmm...knowing Kinana...there's that place in the woods where a bunch of snakes live...would that be too obvious? Eh, might as well check it out..._

She turned into an alley she knew led to the outside, stopping when she reached the outskirts of the city Blue Pegasus was located in. She just had to go up the hill, by that broken-down church, and the woods were right beyond it. Kinana had dragged her to the snake's homes she knew the path through the forest like almost nothing. Kinana was the best at finding places, though...honestly, it was like the girl had super-hearing.

A right here, a left here, and it should be right up ahe- was that voices?

"What. Are. You. Doing. Here."

"Isn't it obvious? I'm making sure my latest pairing becomes canon."

"...The headphone-wearing menace put you up to this, didn't she?"

"No, the angels told me to do it."

"NO. Do NOT start talking about the damn angels! I hear enough about them from your mind to last a lifetime!"

And then a voice that was undoubtably her best friends, quietly whispering "...Angels."

There was a crash and a hysterical laugh, and Laki had to see what was going on.

She did not expect this.

Her friend was sitting on a tree branch with a white-haired woman Laki instantly recognized as Angel of the Oracion Seis. Evidently she had just yanked Kinana up into the tree to avoid a blast of what Laki assumed to be sound from the, well, sound of it. The blast had come from a one-eyed man who she also instantly recognized as Cobra, also of the Oracion Seis.

All the purple-haired mage could muster was, "What."

Kinana turned to look at her, wide-eyed and looking like she wanted to disappear on the spot. Angel also turned, but to look at Cobra, who was whistling.

"You have _Listening Magic. _You are_ always _pointing out that you can hear_ everything. _So _why_, Cobra, did you not hear her coming?"

"...Well..."

"IF IT WAS TO GET A REACTION OUT OF ME IT WORKED VERY VERY WELL GET THE HELL OVER HERE!"

Kinana jumped down from the tree, avoiding Angel, who had completely ignored Laki herself in favor of spring-tackling Cobra and trying to dismember him with her high-heel, from what Laki could make of the very confusing scene.

"Laki..."

The Wood-Make mage shook her head. "Mirajane's following me. Explain later."

Her friend suddenly looked very scared, and immediately let Laki take her hand and run off as fast as she could. If Mirajane found this...well, it would be interesting. Or at least that's what Laki was pretty sure Kinana was thinking.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Laki wasn't one to jump to conclusions, but she had a hunch that Kinana's apparent association with Cobra might just have something to do with the fact that he was a Poison Dragonslayer who used listening magic, and had a snake, and that Kinana had gone crazy and disappeared during the Infinity Clock incident, and that Kinana had been a snake. It fit perfectly, which was why Laki was too busy congratulating herself on her brilliant logic to notice she was headed for a wall, and it took Kinana to drag her out of the way.

"You know, knowing Mirajane, I would think she'd have caught up to us by now."

Laki paused and let go of her purple-haired friend's hand, leaning against the wall. "The woman simply tasked me with stalking you to see what depths to which you disappeared, but as far as I am aware, she was not following me. I only said that to avoid questions before I heard you out."

Kinana took a deep breath...

And proceeded to accurately confirm everything Laki had thought, with the addition of that now the Oracion Seis were apparently on the light side and with Crime Sorciere.

"I find it hard to trust my own recollection that I put all the pieces together and correctly guessed your story."

"Well...you know me...I doubt it was that hard..."

"Kina. What sort of indignation is truly brewing in your soul?"

The girl shifted uneasily. "Crime Sorciere has to stay on the move so the Council doesn't catch them, and that'll mean Cobra will leave...I only just found my friend, and I'd...rather not lost them again."

Laki smirked a little, inwardly. _She's blushing...Mirajane mentions pairings all the time...has our shy little Kinana found love? I wouldn't take her for one to go for the rebellious type, but you never know...Dang, too bad I can't tell Mirajane about this.._"Your current desire is to take an adventure with them, right?"

Kinana flushed more, and sighed a little. "Yeah...but I don't want to leave you, either."

Laki smiled and put both hands on the other girl's shoulders, making a conscious effort to speak normally. Kinana started, surprised. "Listen. I know how long you've been looking for this voice, and I can see how happy you are, getting to spend time with the person it belongs too. Fairy Tail _will revive. _And then, we'll all be back together again. Go! Maybe you'll even figure out how to use some magic!"

"But...Mirajane?"

"I'll just inform her that you found your soulmate. She and her siblings should still be at the guild, if we find your stuff fast, you can avoid awkward questions, okay? Come on!"

Half an hour later, Laki used the trees and her Wood-Make magic to follow her friend up through the woods to a place that seemed like it had been a campsite very shortly before. Cobra was obviously expecting her to be there.

_I really hope Mirajane believes the soulmate thing...then __again, it's Mirajane, when it comes to love, no one dares question her. _

Laki watched as a pink-haired squealing blur flew out of nowhere to knock Kinana over and subsequently Cobra, who couldn't even get an admonishment in as the caped girl excitedly babbled on about how happy she was that Kinana was actually coming with them and now she would actually have things to ship and etc. etc.

Kinana's head flickered back, for a second, and Laki was almost positive she saw the tree branch, bent into the shape of a thumb and ring finger forming an L shape.

_Oh, Kinana. No matter how far apart Fairy Tail is, we'll always be best friends. Tenrou and now this are proving it, and if you really think that being the only two girls in a guild full of perverts isn't a life-bonding experience, then I don't know what's wrong with you. But you never really made great friends with anyone except me. Go make some more life bonds, okay?_

**It was better in my head, but I hope you enjoyed this! REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW**


	31. Angel and Meredy

**I apologize. This is a total word vomit and totally unedited, I've got lots of stuff to do. SCHOOL UGH**

Silence.

Glances occasionally flickered towards the opening to the underground passage, before quickly making their way back to the ground, pretending they hadn't looked.

It wasn't that there was anything wrong with looking. Looking and seeing nothing screamed reality, and reality is a horror no one wants to experience, least of all the pink and white-haired female mages leaning against trees outside said opening.

They seem like they're wishfully waiting for someone, or the pink-haired one is. The other one, more upright then her friend, has a set face, grim and foreboding, but still somehow elegant.

No one comes out.

The pink-haired one is wearing a watch, and she nearly glances there, too. But it reminds her of reality, apparently, and something gone, so she mutters something.

_T__ime doesn't even matter_

and tosses it into the woods.

The Silence, so palpable it seems like a person, lets it fall somewhere in the woods without making a sound. Something flashes across the shorter girl, the one with pink hair's, face, and she visibly winces. The other one sighs.

She also tosses her time-keeping lacrimal into the woods. Being a lacrima, it should have crashed to the ground with an audible sound, but the Silence isn't one easily broken.

_Twice vanished without a sound, only an accepting smile._

The short one involuntarily murmurs. It seems like a reflex, a way of remembering without an end. Anything that simply vanished could reappear.

Accepting smiles, however, especially on vanishing things, tended to speak of more then just vanishment.

Still, whatever they're waiting for stays away.

_If one person gives time to another, are all doomed like this?_

_Ask the ones giving the time. _Bitter is thy name, spoken words. Whoever said pink was a sweet color?

_I can't. They're gone._

A simple word, two words, really, tells of reality. The other sentence, one about asking, speaks of dreams and delusions, an unwillingness to let the vanished be vanished.

_I asked them before, and they were gone then._

_Did you see it before?_

And yet again, looking is the herald of the truth. And then truth is arbitrary, because the eyes deceive. It is difficult, however, to deceive a vanishing. The simplest of magicians may be able to do it, but what they make vanish always returns with a flourish and applause and a spell to reappear. Reality frowns on such spells.

_Seeing isn't always believing. _

_It's been at least three hours. To be able to do something like that, she must have been a fairly fit old lady. We weren't that far underground._

_Cave-ins. _

_Look._

_Passed over enemies._

_Look._

_Some hold-u-_

_LOOK._

_No._

_Reality gave you time for goodbye. It was never going to bring you time twice._

_It gave you time thrice._

_I never vanished, did I?_

_You nearly did._

_Reality is quite exact. And I see you opening your mouth. No, nearly is NOT the same as definite._

_Why not?_

_Because...really, how long do you think she would have been around, anyway? I know you extensively researched that spell, it had side affects. Like, if you survived somehow, rapid, rapid, aging._

_You're so depressing._

_I'm realistic. It would help you._

_Faith and just looking for her has always worked for me before._

No one comes out.

_I'm sure I told you that looking confirms reality. Wasn't that why we stopped glancing and started talking? Humans are arbitrary. You can debate in words. But reality is absolute._

Silence.

**I was trying to write angsty Meredy/Angel brOTP and I just rewatched that episode where Ultear uses Last Ages and decided Angel looks sort of like Ultear and this happened. If you couldn't figure it out, (it was confusing, blame me and my vague self) while fighting Avatar Ultear shows up again per Grey's words, and then she uses Arc of Time to save Meredy's life and vanishes again. Please review!**


	32. Yukino and Frosch

**LORD ALMIGHTY I FINALLY FINISHED THIS FRICKIN' CHAPTER I SAID I WAS GOING TO FINISH IT AND IT TOOK FOUR HOURS BUT I DID IT**

**TAKE THAT, FLEEING CREATIVITY**

"Fro wants a frog! Fro wants a frog!"

Today was the day the annual giant bazaar came to Sabertooth's town, and the members of said guild were thoroughly enjoying it. Yukino had been wandering around with Sting and Rogue before, but Sting had seen Natsu chasing Lucy around with a fake sword and had _absolutely had _to go talk to him, and obviously Rogue had to come. Lector had followed, but Frosch had been involved examining beetles, so Yukino had been left to watch him. Especially because everyone knew what happened when Rogue couldn't find Frosch.

Yukino found it both exasperating and adorable. The rest of the Dragonslayers loved their Exceeds with all their heart and soul, but Rogue took it to the next level. It was like Frosch was his son or something. Finding Nemo, anyone?

They had been separated about half an hour ago, and Yukino was seeing mages from various guilds all over the place. Then again, with how giant the bazaar was and how the guilds had much better relationships with each other since the Grand Magic Games, that was expected. Fairy Tail, of course, was all over the place, but Yukino was sure she'd also seen Lamia Scale, Blue Pegasus(*shudder*), Mermaid Heel, and Quatro Cerberus. In short, all of Fiore's main guilds.

Now, however, she was absorbed in watching Frosch. He had found a game stand for a pet company that had a pet frog in a frog habitat as the main prize. Apparently, you got the frog in a small cage, and then the company delivered the habitat to wherever you lived. Yukino didn't really want to win it for Frosch without asking Rogue first, but then again, as we mentioned earlier, Rogue would do anything to make Frosch happy. So Yukino took out her small bag of jewels and walked up to the stand, Frosch happily jumping up and down behind her.

She was not expecting the young woman running it to widen her eyes and squeal.

"OH MY GOD! Are you seriously Yukino Aguria!?"

Yukino wasn't able to answer for a second. Contrary to what she had thought from Jiemma's actions, the crowd had been quite impressed by how long she lasted against _Kagura Mikazuchi _and the fact that she was courageous enough to bet her very life. And her constantly hanging out with Sting and Rogue didn't help, as she was often in the news for both whatever she did with them and Sorcerer Weekly's obsessive belief that they were in a heated love triangle. They had literally even run a poll to determine who their readers thought she should end up with. Much to Yukino's relief and Sting and Rogue's amusement, it was literally 50/50.

"Um..yes, I-I am."

"WOW! Can I get your autograph!? Please!"

"I..I suppose so…" Yukino stammered, neatly signing the woman's arm. She squealed. "Oh wow! Thanks! Oh right, you wanted to play for the frog habitat?"

Yukino nodded, slightly scared, but nevertheless gave the girl some jewels and tilted her head, staring at the balloons. Apparently she had three to hit three balloons if she wanted the grand prize.

"Go, Yukino!" Frosch cheered, running over from the stand to jump around at her feet. The other girl cooed at the little cat's antics, bending down to get a closer look. Yukino, meanwhile, took aim and threw a dart. She was quite confident in her abilities in throwing, due to Sting's insistence she learn how to throw daggers. This turned out to be a mistake on his part, as she had promptly used the skills he taught her to knock him into the pool repeatedly.

In her defense, he _did _spend half his time doing the same thing to her. Honestly, she wondered how he ever got paperwork done. Probably Rogue.

_Pop! Pop! Pop! _Finishing her reverie, Yukino flung the darts at the balloons, easily popping a red, yellow, and pink one. The girl looked very impressed. "Wow! You're as awesome as I thought you were! You're the first person to get it all day!" She ran behind the counter, probably to grab Yukino's frog habitat. Frosch was jumping up and down again with his usual adorable smile. "Yukino got Frosch a frog!"

Yukino decided not to point out to the obviously clueless girl that the balloons were placed so it would be incredibly hard to get three, and the darts weren't properly sharpened. The girl returned from her counter with a small frog habitat containing a bright blue, ribbiting frog. "Now, you've gotta be careful, this one likes escaping. See you!"

Leading Frosch, Yukino cheerfully waved bye to the energetic girl. "Now, Frosch, what do you say we track down- oh, Lucy-sama!"

The blonde-haired Celestial Spirit mage was arguing with a shopkeeper, apparently about the price of a dress.

"I used to be a heiress, I tell you, and that is in _no way _real silk, so you better reduce this price or I'm gonna- Yukino! I was hoping to see you here! Oh, and is that Frosch? Hi, little guy!"

The shopkeeper took Lucy's distraction as an opportunity to scurry back into his shop, but the blonde caught him red-handed. "I'm not done with you yet," she hissed venomously, before turning right around to embrace Yukino. Yukino hugged her back, but shuddered a bit. Lucy could be scary at times, especially when she caught Natsu being an idiot. Speaking of which…..

As she pulled away from the hug, she asked, "Where's Natsu-sama?"

"Why does everyone assume I'd be with him?" Lucy grumbled under her breath, but answered, "He'd looking for fire with Happy, and I was happy to take the opportunity to shop uninterrupted. Honestly, he's always whining about how my clothes-shopping takes up our time together! It annoys me to no extent!"

Yukino hid a smile. "That sounds like a very couple-ish thing to say…"

Lucy flushed red. "It-it's not like that! Hey, look, Frosch, what's wrong?" she asked, quickly changing the subject. She had a valid concern, though, as Frosch was holding his tail and looking scared.

"Yukino, Frosch's frog escaped!"

"Oh, no!" Yukino nearly shrieked, noticing the container was opened. "Sorry, Lucy-sama, but we'll have to talk later!" Especially since she had just seen the frog running around that corner.

She ran off, Frosch running desperately behind her, leaving behind a very confused Lucy.

"Uh….bye? NO! GET BACK HERE, SHOPKEEPER!"

Yukino almost felt sorry for the trembling shopkeeper. Almost.

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"Why do frogs have to be so small?" Yukino asked the world in general, as she peered around the the corners of market stalls and under the various good-holding tables. A very worried Frosch was helping her, as he had put it, holding back tears for the frog's sake.

Apparently she had been heard, as two boys' voices answered, "Not nearly as small as you, and not nearly as pretty…."

"Frosch, shoot me." Yukino muttered in an unusually direct tone, which wasn't surprising, as she had suddenly been surrounded by sparkles and hearts, along with none other then the Blue Pegasus Trimens. Well, two of them, Ren was missing, presumably with Sherry.

"Would you like a drink? Perhaps a margarita over lunch?"

"Do you need a little brother?"

"We'll be happy to provide either!"

"No, I need a frog." the Celestial Spirit Mage told them with a hint of irritation, she didn't have time for this! Especially because Frosch was beginning to really look panicked, and if he started crying only the higher powers knew what Rogue would do…..

Luckily for her, the Trimens' favorite pastime involved assisting beautiful women.

"You need to find a frog? What for? What does it look like?" Eve questioned her, as Hibiki pulled up his Archive. "Um, that's not really necessary….and it's Frosch's new pet, and it was blue….."

"Of course it's necessary for us to help a lovely lady in distress! Now, let me see…." the Archive Mage quickly typed several commands. "Ah! Your frog is hopping around by that fountain in the middle of the park near Sabertooth! Now, about that margarita…."

But unfortunately for the three professional flirts, Yukino had already run off, Frosch in tow. "Thank you, Hibiki-sama, Eve-sama!"

The two looked at each other. "We need a new flirting ground…...want to go find Ren?"

"No, Sherry will chase us off with one of her creepy dolls again for interrupting their 'couple time'...personally, I think she's just jealous."

"Well, she's the one who decided she liked the guy whose job it is to flirt with people."

"You're being unusually blunt today, Hibiki? Lucy reject you?"

"No, the wonderful redhead by the name of Erza! She chased me off with words and swords, both sharp to the ears!"

Eve winced. "I told you she wasn't a good target…"

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"Frosch, do you see anything?"

"Frosch doesn't see the frog anywhere! Frosch is worried!"

"Don't worry, we'll find him!"

The fountain had proved to be a fruitless search, but passersby had said they saw a frog fitting the description bouncing around by it earlier and that it might still be near, so the two were looking through the various bushes for any sign of Frosch's new pet. While they were looking, three familiar faces came walking over to them curiously, probably wondering what they were doing under a park bench.

Yukino was also curious. What the heck were Mirajane Strauss, Orga Nanagear, and Gajeel Redfox doing together?

"Yukino! What are you and Frosch doing over there?" Mirajane asked cheerfully, dashing over to lean under the park bench and give Yukino a big hug.

"We're looking for Frosch's frog….what are you three doing together?"

"Lookin' for a karaoke bar." Gajeel explained gruffly.

"They threw us out of all the ones in Magnolia." Mirajane explained sheepishly, rubbing the back of her head. "I'm assuming by us you mean the other two?" Yukino asked quietly. "Oh, no!" the other girl replied.

"Apparently her ability to transform into Ichiya was 'too disturbing'." Orga told his guildmate with some irritation. "And what'd you mean by that? Gajeel and I are _brilliant _singers."

Gajeel obviously agreed with the godslayer, as he nodded smirkingly. "Gihi."

Yukino and Mirajane both sweatdropped. _Ah, well, it'll be a while before they're stripped of that notion…_

"So you said you were looking for Frosch's frog, Yukino?" Mirajane asked kindly, though Orga interrupted her. "How'd you let the crazy Dragonslayer let you take the cat?! He treats that thing like it's his **child!**"

"He got dragged away by Sting…." she explained amusedly. "And yeah, Mirajane-sama. I won Frosch a frog at a carnival game….but it got out of its cage!"

"Really! That's awful!" Mirajane told her sincerely, looking sympathetically at the furiously nodding Frosch. "Fro thinks so too!"

Gajeel and Orga rolled their eyes at each other, but volunteered, "Well, we did smell an unusual typ'a frog over by the weapons stalls. You might wanna check there."

Yukino grinned, getting up. "We'll try there, then! Thank you, and good luck with the karaoke!"

"We don't need it!" Gajeel and Orga yelled in unison. Mirajane simply giggled embarrassedly. _I think she's right….._

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The two people Yukino and Frosch were _not _expecting to find at the weapons stall would definitely be Wendy and Chelia, Charle tagging along behind them. "I didn't know you two were interested in weapons like these….." the white-haired teenager said, looking over the sharp and very spiky maces, swords, and clubs.

"Natsu-san was here a second ago...but he went to find Lucy-san….something about a shopkeeper." Wendy told them, while weighing a huge baseball bat shaped club in her hands. They certainly looked right at home, with Chelia questioning the manager about dagger prices and Charle examining a little katana.

Yukino winced. "She must have gotten really out of control."

"Ehehe, sounds like Lucy-san…." Wendy laughed nervously, obviously afraid of the blonde's infamous temper and resulting kicks/punches. She had done it to Sting on more then one occasion for interrupting her and Yukino's shopping, and Sting spent the next two days with an icepack on his head.

Frosch jumped over to Wendy, looking concerned. "Frosch is looking for his frog, and Yukino is helping."

"Your frog?" Chelia asked, looking over from her conversation curiously. "I could have sworn I saw him a minute ago...was he blue?"

"Yes!" Frosch cheered eagerly. "Did you see him?" Yukino asked, also eager. She really wanted to find this frog and go catch Sting and Rogue, wherever they were.

"I saw it." Charle told her seriously. "It was a few minutes ago, it hopped by here, in the direction of Sabertooth's guild hall. If you want to track it down, you should hurry."

"Yay! Frosch is going to find his frog!" Frosch exclaimed, tugging on Yukino's shoe. "Come on, Yukino!"

"I'm coming!" she laughed, reaching down to pick up the little Exceed. "Thank you for your help!" she added, as she ran off once again chasing the darned blue frog.

"You're welcome!" Wendy yelled back at her, as Charle shook her head. "Honestly, first it was the frog cat, and now it's a frog….why can Sabertooth not keep track of their amphibians!?"

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Yukino, Frosch in arms, practically flew down the alley ways to the home of Sabertooth, the guild hall. She staved off several more attempts to engage her in conversation, only stopping to tell Lisanna where Mirajane had gone("And really, don't go, you'll injure your ears) and to inform Kagura of Millianna's whereabouts(and nearly being forced to join Mermaid Heel in the process, the swordswoman could be rather…..overenthusiastic).

"Frosch! Do you see it?!" she shouted, for the frog-cat had suddenly jumped out of her arms and ran over to hide behind a bush. She joined him, seconds later, and could clearly see a blue frog staring at another bush. "Aren't you going to go get him, Frosch? Frosch?"

He was deep in thought, if his expression was any indication. After nodding to himself several times, he turned to Yukino. "Yukino and Sting and Rogue let Frosch find his own way back to the guild hall when he got lost, so he could learn! Frosch thinks we need to let the frog learn how to get back on his own, too!"

Yukino nearly _broke_.

She honestly hadn't even thought the cat was capable of such thoughts, as he generally acted as though his intelligence was, well….below average. But this was obviously proving her wrong, the green Exceed seemed as good at ideas as she herself could be. Smiling gently at Frosch, she said softly. "That's a great idea, Frosch."

Following the frog on its path towards the guild hall, Yukino was incredibly surprised to find, that through pure luck or coincidence, the frog was hopping directly towards the guild hall. She found it a little suspicious, actually, but she was glad. She wasn't sure how much longer she could have run around looking for that frog.

Finally approaching the guild hall, Frosch finally decided to leave the shadows and retrieve his frog, carefully bringing it back to Yukino, who placed it in its cage and closed the door tight. "There we go!" She went back into the guild hall, only for….

"Hey, Yukino, what's that?"

"STING EUCLIFFE DON'T OPEN THE- STTTIINNNGGG!"

In the subsequent death, destruction, and eventual frog-finding that followed, no one noticed a white-haired woman slip out of of the guild hall in the chaos. She grinned.

"Glad I found that frog earlier! Being able to copy it and get the both of us back to the guild hall certainly made Yukino's day a bit easier…..I better go find Gajeel and Orga before they start singing 'Fergalicious' again!"

And with that, Mirajane Strauss walked off to go kill two different slayers.

**Review!**


	33. Wendy and Lucy

**I'm back from Europe! And I wrote a bunch while I was gone, so I'll be publishing things as I type them up, as everything's currently in my notebook.**

**And yes, this is a literal thing that happened between me and my sister. I'm Lucy, she's Wendy.**

"I wanna kidnap a baby turtle."

"You want to _what now_?"

It was after their latest mission, and Erza was currently in the mayor's house with Natsu and Grey. Natsu had gone overboard with his fire attacks and hit Grey, who had instantly retaliated and the two ended up causing more damage to the town then the people they were hunting down. Knowing what the red-head usually did in situations such as this, Lucy and Wendy had "taken a walk", otherwise known as running away as far as they possibly to avoid the swords it was certain Erza would be throwing.

Charle and Happy had stayed behind, hoping to prevent another slew of property damage. Makarov was close enough to a heart attack as it was, and it had been made unspokenly clear that Laxus had elaborate plans to slay whoever triggered it.

Lucy was 99% sure it would be Natsu and Grey no matter what Erza and the Exceeds did. Actually, Erza would probably be one of the ones triggering it, but no one was going to tell her that.

The blonde and blue-haired girls' walk had taken them to a long fence overlooking a waterfall that fell into a stream, creating small pools as it wound around the many rocks dotting the landscape below. Wendy had wanted to stop and look at it, and Lucy had obliged, and the younger girl had been staring at the pool (containing several baby turtles) thoughtfully before turning to Lucy and announcing that she intended to kidnap one.

"I want to kidnap a baby turtle." Wendy repeated solemnly, giving Lucy a look that said she was completely serious.

"Why do you want to kidnap a baby turtle?" Lucy asked helplessly, staring down the ravine at said amphibians.

Wendy gave Lucy a strange glance before returning her attention to the turtles. "Because they're cute, obviously." she said, as this were something Lucy certainly should have known. Before the blonde could answer, she continued cheerfully, "It'll be easy! I'll just climb down the ravine and grab one from the pools! There's so many, nobody's gonna miss just one."

Lucy sighed. "Wendy, turtles are fast swimmers. As soon as they see you coming towards them, they'll jump in the water and swim off. You'll never be able to catch up."

"Yes I will!" the Dragonslayer insisted obstinately, running off to prove her ability to catch turtles before the older mage could say anything else.

Lucy could only watch as Wendy scampered down the nearby flight of concrete stairs and dashed along the rocks, displaying an agility most children her age lacked. Unfortunately for the blue-haired girl, Lucy was proven correct as Wendy attempted to sneak up on the baby turtles and leap at them, hands outstretched, they were already in the pool of clear water, swimming to the other side as fast as their little fins could carry them.

The blonde girl was prepared to meet a disappointed face with pat on the head and a light-hearted I-told-you-so. She did not have a plan of procedure for Wendy's determined expression and purposeful walk.

"The turtles won this round," she conceded, glaring down at the animals now once again sitting on the rocks, "but all I need is a few tools and they'll be unable to escape my grasp." She held up a hand, counting down on her fingers the aforementioned tools. "Let's see, definitely a net, rainboots are a must….maybe some bread for bait, hmm….ooh, a glass tank to put it in would be a good idea as well…." Wendy trailed off, looking thoughtful.

"Wendy, you can't kidnap a turtle." the Celestial Mage told her desperately.

The bluenette spared her a confused look. "I know that."

Lucy was now the confused one. "Then what are you talking about-" The other girl wasn't listening, having already ran off, heading in the direction of the nearest shop. The blonde, sensing trouble, chased after her. It was no easy task, as her teammate had quite the head start on her. Eventually she caught up, only to see Wendy finalizing the purchase of a net, rainboots, bread, and a glass tank. "Wendy, you said you weren't going to kidnap anything!"

"I said I wasn't going to kidnap turtles." the younger Fairy Tail mage replied, leaning down to yank her foot into a rainboot. Reaching over towards the other one, she continued, "I said I was going to kidnap _baby_ turtles." Slamming her feet against the ground several times to ensure the boots were properly secured, she dropped the bread and the tank in the net, slung it over her shoulder, and marched out to complete her turtle abduction.

Lucy stood there for a few seconds. "Oh."

A lightbulb then lit in her head, and she instantly jumped to her feet, her eyes widening.

"Wendy! You can't kidnap a baby turtle, either!"

**Wendy, Wendy, Wendy. Lucy's got her hands full. I'm still freaking out over the chapter, too. **

**NATSU. WHAT IS UNDER THAT BANDAGE. END ALERT END ALERT SOUND THE SIRENS**


	34. Wendy and Gajeel

**The continuation of Wendy's Turtle Adventures! I haven't updated in forever and it's short I'm sorry please don't hurt me**

There were times, many of them, when Gajeel didn't understand children. This was one of them.

Attempting to find a Salamander-free place to train, he had chanced upon a lake in the woods directly outside of Magnolia. It would have been perfect, had it not been for the fact that the only female Dragonslayer was kneeled besides it, staring intently at the water's surface.

"Wendy?"

He was ignored. Gajeel disliked being ignored, and so marched up to the little girl and firmly tapped her on the shoulder. "Oi, Wendy! What're you-"

"_Shhhhhhh!_" she whispered fiercely, flipping her head around and slamming a finger over his lips to shut him up. "You'll interrupt the ritual!"

Gajeel was extremely confused. Pushing her hand away, he asked (without lowering his voice at all, "The hell you talkin' about? What ritual?"

Wendy gave him a glare that would make Erza Scarlet proud. "_Be. Quiet!_" she whispered again, though this time it was more of a hiss. "I'm trying to summon my turtle minions!"

Gajeel blinked. Twice.

Noticing the abject confusion that was obvious on Gajeel's face, Wendy rolled her eyes and explained. "I'm the turtle whisperer, see? And this," she added, grandly gesturing to the lake, "is my turtle army."

"..there aren't any turtles." Gajeel flatly pointed out. Wendy gave him a long-suffering look and an exasperated sigh.

"There _were_," she said slowly, as if to make sure this time he understood, "before _you_ scared them off."

Gajeel was no expert on kids, but he figured this was when he was supposed to apologize. Luckily for him (as Gajeel Redfox _despised_ apologizing, and sucked at it too), Wendy beat him to it.

"It's quite alright, though," she said, waving off his impending apology and adopting a business-like tone and expression he just knew she learned from Charle, "They'll be back soon enough."

"When...oh." True to her words, as soon as she had said 'enough', little turtle heads began poking out from the water as they began swimming in the two Fairy Tail mages' direction. One, two, ten, fifteen..._how many was that?!_

Gajeel was not expecting this. When Wendy said turtle army, he expected a few baby turtles who Wendy had managed to befriend. He had not imagined about three hundred turtle heads who he swore had glassy looks in their eyes hypnotically making their way towards his young friend.

Now they were all crowded in the water around Wendy's knees, pushing and shoving to nudge her as she ran her hand over their smooth green shells. "See? They're my personal army!" she exclaimed happily, giving him a huge grin.

Gajeel sighed. For all her maturity and magic power, she really acted like the kid she was sometimes. "Kid, I hate to break it to ya, but you can't have a turtle army."

"Why not?" the bluenette asked, tilting her head sideways.

"Turtles don't understand human speech."

He would have said more, but a sudden feeling of dark foreboding struck him as Wendy continued to smile just as brightly as before. Without falter, she jumped to her feet, raised a hand in the air, and proceeded to scream something Gajeel would not have expected to hear coming out of Wendy Marvell's mouth, "TURTLES UNITE!_ Sacrifice the unbelievers!_"

The turtles literally (literally!) leapt out of the water at her call, presumable to catch Gajeel and use him for a sacrifice. Gajeel did not stick around to find out as Wendy cackled.

And considering that the fearsome Black Steel Gajeel spent the next_ six-and-a-half_ hours hiding from three hundred turtles thirsting for blood, the world was once again reminded to keep Wendy Marvell happy, no matter what the cost.

***sings* lalalallalala revieeeeeewwwwwwwww thanks!**


	35. Gray and Lucy

**Guess what? I'm alive! And I actually have a legitimate excuse this time. School started, and as I'm not only on the tennis team but in all honors classes and have to get up at 5:15 AM for the bus, I have all of fifteenish minutes to write per day, if that. So updates are probably going to be few and far between, especially considering my writing style seems to be evolving. I'm really sorry this took so long. Hope you enjoy it anyways! **

"Lucy! Hey, Lucy!" a whisper was heard, floating into her ear.

Lucy turned, only to see Gray Fullbuster peering out from behind a pillar. Glancing around as to make sure no one was watching, he snatched her hand and pulled her next to it with him. Lucy was fairly annoyed, as she had been in the middle of enjoying one of Mira's delicious milkshakes.

"What?" she hissed, giving him a glare that spoke of _this better be important because I want my milkshake, dammit! _Her raven-haired friend nervously tapped his fingers on the wooden wall next to him and took a deep breath. "I need a favor."

Lucy looked at him for a second and groaned. "Alright, what'd you do to piss Erza off this time? I'm not distracting her again." The last time she had done that, the swordswoman had ended up reading the beginning of her manuscript, which Lucy wasn't _nearly _close to being done with yet!

"No, it's not Erza!" Gray frantically assured her, though he glanced around again as if making sure the red-head wasn't actually mad and looking for him. Lucy figured it was a reflex. She waited for him to tell her what he wanted, and when he hesitated, she rolled her eyes and glared again. "Then what is it?"

Gray looked at the ground and muttered. "You know Juvia pretty well, right? Like, the kind of stuff she likes?" he asked, sounding almost embarrased. Lucy could feel her mood flipping involuntarily. _Oh oh ohhhhhhhh. _

"Yeah, we're pretty much best friends." she managed to say nonchalantly. _It's gonna take all my willpower not to tell Mirajane about this. _She wouldn't, though, that would be cruelty beyond imagination and something she'd never willingly inflict on one of her best friends. "What about it?"

"Isortofneedtobuyheragift." Gray stammered out, before quickly and immediately rushing to explain. "I mean, it's not for any particular reason, she just made me that awesome scarf and I was a jerk to her when she gave it to me and so I thought it would probably be a good idea to get her a gift back." He gave Lucy an almost-pleading look, as if begging her to understand. Lucy wouldn't tell Mirajane, but she certainly wasn't above teasing Gray to death.

She made a show of flipping through an imaginary calendar. "Oh? Sure it's not for an anniversary or something? I'm almost positive today's your 478th or something along those lines..."

Gray gave her an extremely unamused look and she snickered. "It's an _apology gift. _Nothing. Else."

"Aw, you care about Juvia's feelings! That's so sweet!" Lucy cooed, clasping her hands together.

"I just don't want to be a jerk! And shut up, the demon woman's watching!" Gray whispered, sounding like he'd much rather fight Tartaros again then have Mirajane the Demon Matchmaker overhear this particular conversation. Lucy, now outright laughing, grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the guildhall, somehow managing to escape without Juvia shrieking about love rivals, Natsu attacking Gray/dragging Lucy off for a job, or getting hit by a chair from the brawl going on. This was a momentous achievement, in Lucy's eyes.

Once they were safely outside, Lucy turned back to her friend/victim, still grinning. "Well, _I _think it's concern."

Gray grumbled. "Oh, shut up and help me. I don't know what the hell she would like. What do girls like, anyway?"

His blonde teammate shrugged. "Depends on the girl." She pulled out a communication lacrima, typing a few things in on the screen. "Our first order of business is to make sure Juvia won't find us, though. It would be a serious problem if she did."

The lacrima beeped softly and Cana's face appeared on the screen. "Lucy! What's up?"

Gray gave Lucy an alarmed look. "Cana? But if you tell her-"

"Can you distract Juvia for a while, keep her away from Magnolia's shopping centers for a little bit?" Lucy asked, pushing Gray's face away from the screen with her free hand.

Cana's head tilted to the side as she noticed Gray, and her expression morphed to one of slyness. "Ooooh, _I _see how it is." Gray's expression turned to one of terror and Cana began to laugh. "Your expression totally gives it away! Good luck with this one, Lucy! I'll distract Juvia, sure. We'll go out for drinks or something!"

Lucy and Gray both shuddered. "Please do not get Juvia drunk. Trust me, that didn't end well." Lucy told the brunette, remembering Juvia's alcohol-induced shenanigans from their training session before the Grand Magic Games.

"And don't tell anyone about this!" Gray yelled as Lucy's finger hovered over to the off button.

"Alright, alright! We'll have fun!" Cana laughed, waving an alcohol bottle in the air as her face flickered. Satisfied, Lucy stuck the lacrima back in her bag and turned to Gray. "There we go!" she said cheerfully.

Gray scowled. "She's gonna tell someone. Probably Mirajane." he complained.

Lucy snorted. "Everyone will know you gave Juvia a present as soon as you give it to her. You're already dooming yourself by the act." she reminded him, already heading down the main road towards the mall. "Coming?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm right behind you." Gray sighed, easily catching up with the other teenager. In truth, he would have much rather not consulted anyone at all and just bought a gift for Juvia and given it to her, in private, but as well as he knew the water mage (which was very well), Gray had always sucked at giving gifts. Adding to that that the only girls he had ever given gifts to were Erza and on occasion Cana or Lucy (who were easy because swords, alcohol, and anything frilly), and he regrettably knew that he was going to require help with this endeavour. Figuring that Lucy, the girly-girl and least likely to tell anyone would be the best option, he had consequently sought out her help. She was willing to help, but her price was teasing. Lots and lots of teasing.

"We could bake her Juvia bread. I bet she'd _love _that."

"That idea was dead before it even came out of your mouth." the ice mage deadpanned, following behind her. While he spent a surprising amount of time shopping compared to a typical member of the male species (what? He had an image to uphold!), he didn't spend much time in the mall per say, and was therefore completely dependent on Lucy to lead him around.

"What about we give her a scarf, too?" Lucy suggested, a gleam in her eye.

"If you're about to suggest we buy a matching scarf or embroider my name/face onto it, I will kill you here and now."

"You wouldn't dare touch me." Lucy happily told him with absolute certainty. Considering Erza, Mirajane, Cana, and maybe even Juvia might come after him if he dared touch a head on Lucy's head, Gray needed no reminders. And that wasn't even counting Natsu, and the guy could actually be somewhat insane when injuries and Lucy were combined. And Lucy said _Gray _was dense. Watching her and Natsu interact was almost painful.

Then again, he was sure she'd say the exact same thing about him and Juvia, and so chose not to mention it.

"So where're we going?"

"The lingerie store." Lucy told him without a hint of sarcasm.

"_Lucy_."

She gave him a confused look. "I'm serious. Juvia loves lingerie."

Gray groaned. "First of all, I did not need to know that. Second, I think Erza's cluelessness and complete lack of tact are rubbing off on you, which is a shame, she's crazy. I can't give _Juvia _any kind of _lingerie_!"

His blond friend stopped and considered for a moment, before laughing. "That'd probably give her the wrong idea! Or right idea..." she added, giving him a suggestive look. Gray granted her a long-suffering one back.

"Please do not joke about that."

"Alright, alright, I'll quit it." Lucy snickered, thankfully turning away from that particular store's direction. "Though I must say, you seem fairly comfortable in this part of the store. Any reason I should know about?"

Gray shuddered, not even taking the bait this time. "Erza didn't really have any female friends when she started shopping...there. So I'm sure you can guess what happened."

Lucy covered her hand with her mouth as she walked, obviously attempting not to cackle at the image. "That must have been interesting."

"It was _awful._" Gray corrected, nearly crashing into Lucy as she stopped short in front of an umbrella shop.

Gray immediately shook his head. "She's got like a million already, and I'd _never _give Juvia an umbrella, y'know?"

Lucy nodded understandingly. "I figured. I wouldn't give the girl an umbrella either. Now, if we turn right here..." his friend muttered directions to herself as she dragged him down an escalator and through five halls. "Here we are!" she proclaimed, proudly presenting a cheerful-looking boutique with mounds of blue clothing. The shop owner and employees waved as she walked in with Gray, making it obvious that she came here a lot.

"Juvia's favorite color is definitely blue, especially considering that's all she wears." Lucy told Gray happily. "So I thought, maybe we should buy her something blue!"

The raven-haired boy shrugged. "It's as good an idea as any." He then noticed the devious look on Lucy's face. She looked like she was trying extremely hard not to laugh.

Gray sighed, walking over to the nearest rack of blue, painted fans. "Go ahead, spit it out. I'm already mentally prepared."

"Well, I mean, brides always have to have something blue to wear to their weddings, don't they? This'll definitely be a useful present for you and Juvia!" Lucy cackled, nearly falling over with laughter.

"You think you're _sooo _funny." Gray muttered resentfully under his breath, knowing that absolutely no retort would cause the blonde girl to take that back. Instead, he focused on the fans. Would Juvia like a fan? He had never seen her carry one, then again, she did like being fancy, and Gray could have sworn that fans were associated with fanciness. Lucy had said something about having one when she was still a heiress, anyway, so they probably were. He turned to ask her about it, but she was way too busy gushing over some sky-blue purse and obviously would be no help.

It didn't matter, anyway. All of the fans had little flowers or stupid motivational sayings or some deep quote from a poem Gray would probably know if he had been to school on them, and besides, none of them felt very…..Juvia.

Taking a glance back at Lucy to make sure she hadn't absolutely fainted over whatever the hell she was looking at now, he allowed his eyes to rove around the store. Shoes were out of the question, that just seemed like a weird gift to give. He also immediately ruled out anything with hearts, roses, or anything else that suggested love, as that would instantly set off one of Juvia's vivid fantasies and Gray wasn't sure he could stand another narration. It wasn't that he minded the girl herself as many seemed to think, but her imagination and never-ending displays of affection could be a bit off-putting. At least she had quit the stalking a long time ago.

As the ice mage pondered over racks of jackets in various shades of aqua and turquoise (already knowing he wouldn't be buying any of them), a grandmotherly-looking shop employee approached him. "Buying something for your girlfriend, dearie?"

Gray scowled. "She's a friend." _Just a friend. _"She made me something and I figured it'd be nice to get her a present back."

The old woman cackled. "They all say that, don't they? Now, what's her favorite color? I'll assume it's blue. We have a lovely assortment of furred hats over here that are _soo _in style, according to my granddaughter…."

* * *

"Why did I agree to this?" Gray moaned as he was dragged away from the employees by a laughing Lucy. It had been four hours and they must have made him look at _every single piece of merchandise in the entire store, _but of course there was either nothing in Juvia's size or Gray was positive she wouldn't like it. The employees waved a cheerful goodbye as the two walked off, obviously unaware of the hell they had just put Gray through.

"You know, for 'just an apology present,' you're _really _putting a lot of effort into this!" Lucy sang, giving Gray a knowing smirk. Unable to think of an appropriate response, Gray simply grumbled denials under his breath as Lucy (not listening, of course), examined the store directory.

"Ooh!" This is going to be interesting. "Accessories! This is the best jewelry shop ever! I'm sure you'll find something here!" Lucy squealed, though Gray suspected this was partially because she looked like she was planning to buy at least twenty pieces of jewelry for herself as well.

"That's what you said about the last store." Gray pointed out, causing Lucy to glance over at him with a glare. "Oh, do shut up. You _asked _for my help." she retorted, turning past an ice-cream shop towards to aforementioned jewelry store. The first thing Gray noticed was the abundance of giant, glittery necklaces and rings in the store windows, and he internally groaned. If there was one thing Juvia didn't seem to like, it was excessively fancy things. Her tastes (except in displays of affection) seemed to be much more simplistic. Nevertheless, he allowed Lucy to happily skip into the store, following with much less pep.

Instantly, your usual Perky Jewelry Store Employee® came rushing over, bursting with enthusiasm and glitter. Gray was instantly annoyed. Lucy instantly became best friends.

"Hi there! What're you two looking for today?" she asked cheerily, bouncing up and down where she was standing. Lucy lost no time in informing her all about the situation, and of course the employee (whose name was the most Perky Jewelry Store Employee® name ever, Kailey) instantly took it to be romantic. Even though it wasn't. At. All.

"Aw, that's so sweet! So it's like a gift exchange!" she exclaimed, quickly glancing around the store and ignoring Gray's protests. "Let's see….ooh! I know!" She immediately headed to the left of the store, towards a couple shelves heavily laden with overly glittery necklaces, rings, and bracelets. Lucy pushed him in that direction and gave him a smile before skipping off towards the section that was entirely pink. Like literally, even the shelves were pink. Following Kailey, he found himself in what looked like a Valentine's Day clearance sale. Hearts, flower symbols, and sparkles covered every inch of the tables and wall hangings, and there was lots of pink and red. Gray's eyebrow twitched.

"Um….." he asked, gesturing to a particularly large and sparkly necklace, "do you have anything less….Valentin-esque?" Kailey looked disappointed.

"Are you sure? These are excellent gifts for that special girl in your life!" she tried, giving him a wink. Gray's other eyebrow started to twitch.

"I'm _very _sure." he told her, putting an extreme accent on the _very_. Kailey sighed heavily.

"Alright, if you insist…ah, let's go here!" she cried, grabbing his hand and dragging him across the store, Lucy giving him a cheerful wave as he was dragged past her pink section, and he ended at another part of the store, one with much less bling. Gray let out a sigh of relief. He could tell that Kailey had been tempted to stop at the giant hats section.

She bounced along behind him, spouting useless information about the various pieces of jewelry as Gray examined the shelves for something that seemed Juvia. He barely cast a glance at the dark-colored gems, instead heading directly for the light blue and white ones. Dark didn't fit Juvia - she was much too cheerful and _light _for that. Some of the heart necklaces were pretty in Gray's limited knowledge, but that would give Juvia the wrong idea and while Gray had finally stopped kidding himself and admitted that he enjoyed her company immensely, he did not enjoy her tackling him and declaring her love for the twentieth time that day (which would definitely happen if he gave her anything with hearts.) So hearts were out.

Flower-shaped gems were weird and square shaped ones looked funny. Gray was beginning to wonder how the hell the girls always found jewelry that looked good in such a short amount of time. This was _difficult._ Although, he thought, examining an admittedly-lovely blue-white bracelet, a lot of things looked good on Juvia, so it shouldn't be this difficult. Then Gray realized just what he was thinking and immediately focused all mental power on jewelry.

Shopping was hard. Lucy seemed to have bought at least seven necklaces and a purse, as she came wandering over with several bags hanging on her arms. "Any luck? Ooh, these are pretty...no, no, Lucy, you need rent money!" she berated herself aloud, peering into the display case Gray was examining. "Which one are you looking at?"

Shrugging nonchalantly, Gray waved towards a silver necklace. It was a simple chain with teardrop-shaped gems (half ice-blue and half a bit darker) placed every six chains or so. Lucy oohed and aahed for several minutes before calling Kailey over to take the necklace out of its display case. It was even prettier out from under the glass top of its case.

"What do you think?" Gray asked, holding the necklace up to the light.

Lucy clapped her hands excitedly. "Get it, it's perfect! And then I can borrow it from Juvia!" she exclaimed happily, causing Gray to snort.

"Sure, she'd lend a necklace from me to her 'Love-Rival'." he reminded her, causing Lucy to playfully punch him on the arm as he walked up to the counter.

While Kailey punched the numbers in, Lucy examined the necklace again before snickering. Gray was almost afraid to ask, but he couldn't help himself. "What."

"You know…" she said, snickering some more, "the gems on this are the same color as your ice and Juvia's water when she summons it. Any particular reason?"

Gray flushed red and glared at her. "No! It just fits her!" he tried to explain, realizing that his defense was just making Lucy laugh harder as they headed out of the store, purchases in hand.

"It just _fits her, _oh?" Lucy cackled, following him out of the store. "So your associated color fits her? On a necklace with her own? So much for not a romantic gift!"

Gray scowled. "Lucy!"

She just snickered again. "You'll never get rid of me. Until you admit your eternal love."

"Really? I don't know, Lucy, considering how you keep smiling at Natsu like that, you might have some eternal love to admit as well." Gray shot back with a smirk. Lucy's ears turned red.

"This is your gratitude for my shopping help!?"

"You didn't even do anything! You just shopped for yourself!"

"I provided moral support!"

"In the form of teasing!"

"Necessary to the ship. Mira's paying me in milkshakes, you know." Lucy told him smugly, crossing her arms.

"I'm going to kill you." Gray deadpanned, raising a hand as if to perform magic. Lucy just sent him a smirk.

"But then Juvia'd probably get mad at you, and you _certainly _can't have that!" she laughed, grinning triumphantly at the instant blush that lightly tinted Gray's cheeks.

"That's it!" he shrieked, furiously chasing her down the street as she cackled.

"Aw, come on! You can't have your true love _angry _at you!"

"SCREW YOU, LUCY!"

"I don't think Juvia would like that much!"

Oh, she was _dead_.

* * *

When they got back to the guild, absolute chaos reigned again. The source of this chaos seemed to be the Thunder Legion and Laxus, who were running around in absolute panic as Bixlow's babies attracted every bit of metal on their person. It was extremely entertaining, in Gray's opinion.

Lucy gave him a wink as she headed back to the bar, where Mira once again had a milkshake ready with an evil gleam in her eyes, and Gray got a horrible feeling that she was about to be informed of every little detail on that trip. Nevertheless, Gray waved goodbye and headed towards Juvia, who was in a corner with a hysterically laughing Cana, looking somewhat bemused but also entertained.

As expected, Juvia lit up at the sight of him. "Gray-sama!"

Cana grinned. "Yo, Gray! Everything go alright?"

"I"m going to murder Lucy." was Gray's response as he dropped into a seat between her and Juvia. "Was _this _your distraction method?" he added, gesturing to the magnetic babies and the panicking guild members. Cana snickered, which Gray took to mean yes.

"Distraction?" Juvia asked curiously. Was that what Cana hadn't been telling her?

Gray awkwardly tapped his hand on the table and handed her a velvet blue bag. "I was sort of a jerk to you when you gave me that scarf, and I figured it would be nice to make it up to you." he muttered, dropping the bag in her hand.

Juvia was stunned enough that she forgot to conjure up a ridiculous fantasy of Gray proposing to her and them getting married that very night. "This is for Juvia?" she asked, pulling out the ribbons and revealing the necklace.

Cana whistled. "Damn, Gray, for a girl you apparently aren't in love with, that's a seriously good present."

"You're as bad as Lucy," Gray told her, still looking at Juvia, who was examining her present. She glanced up at him.

"So Gray-sama had Cana-san distract Juvia so that Gray-sama could buy Juvia the necklace?"

"Uh, pretty much, yeah."

Juvia smiled softly, clasping the necklace around her neck. "Thank you, Gray-sama." she said quietly, running her fingers over the gems. "It's beautiful."

Gray was honestly extremely surprised. He knew Juvia would like it, but he had expected a tackle and a shriek of 'Gray-sama I love you!' (several of them, in fact). He had not expected a _calm _Juvia. It was….rather nice, actually. Gray may or may not have really liked this Juvia. And come to think of it, he had never seen her smile like that before…..

Then Cana sent him a wink and he internally shuddered. From that, it was fairly obvious Cana was behind this sudden change, and Gray was now imagining the various stories she must have told Juvia while bringing about this change. Cana Alberona was not someone you really wanted to trust with your deepest secrets (which Gray had done), and he was now seriously regretting that decision.

He dared glance over at Juvia again and immediately noticed that 1.) the necklace looked really really good on her and 2.) Lucy was holding back snickers. Gray felt his cheeks heat up. Oh god. He was not blushing. No, yes he was.

Lucy fell off the stool in typical overdramatic Lucy fashion, cackling hysterically as everyone glanced at her in confusion. "_I rest my case!" _she laughed, wiping tears from her eyes. Gray punched her, sending her flying back into a wall, which restarted the brawl with Laxus and the Thunder Legion (still being chased by the magnetic babies) smack-dab in the middle of it.

"That hurt." she complained, giving him a pouty stare from where she was sitting next to the now-broken wall. Gray raised an eyebrow.

"You deserved it."

The all-knowing smirk she _had _to have gotten from Mira returned. "But I was _right._"

Gray had an internal argument on whether to try retorting, and very quickly came to the conclusion that it would be completely and utterly useless. "Fine. I admit. You were somewhat just a little bit right. Now shut up."

Lucy thought for a moment, and then her smirk widened and she caught Cana and Mira's eye. They seemed to understand the entire conversation from just that look (girls were so strange that way. How did they do it? Was it a secret girl language that girls were required to learn? More proof that Erza wasn't a girl at all- she was as confused as the boys were.)

Lucy grabbed Gray's hand, yanking him off balance and unable to do anything as Cana screamed over the commotion, "OH JUVIA!"

Gray gave Lucy a long, sad, pleading look. "Are we not friends?"

She snickered. "It's for your own good." Damn her. Lucy Heartfilia really was ridiculously smart, for a girl who had been a pampered heiress until she was seventeen- she was always right. In a way that actually made some sane sort of sense (unlike Erza, who was always right in the my-sword-speaks-for-me way).

How had he lived without being friends with this girl for so long again?

Happy was floating in front of both of them now. Gray barely had time to curse before the irritating blue furball warbled out, "So Gray llliiiikkeess Juvia in the same way Lucy liiiikkkkeees Natsu?" he asked, totally innocently (or so he seemed to think).

The two didn't even have to look at each other before they sent Happy flying six ways to Sunday. Truly, their friendship was magical.

**Did I actually go and make a My Little Pony reference? Maybe. **

**(And what's this? A chapter without Crime Sorciere [read: Cobra, Meredy, Angel] at all? How did that happen?) The next chapter will cover Cana and Juvia's prank and the conversation they had about Gray, because I'm sure you're curious (you can thank Chartreuse if you are, they're the reason I'm writing that part lol). Anyway, this has been my favorite chapter to write so far, plus I'm really trying to accurately write Gray, so please do review!**

**ALSO- for those who would like to follow me on tumblr, my url is thefourteenthdarkone. Leave yours in the review if you've got a tumblr and I'll check it out!**


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